milestones

I recently turned 39, and I’m dreading turning 40. Reaching a milestone age is so overwhelming and daunting. I was very depressed turning 30 and seriously considered suicide six months later because of how my life was going. I did a lot, though, to create a better life for myself by building much better self-esteem and confidence, and developing much better self-awareness. However, my personal life barely improved. I’m losing hope in finding love and I feel that time is running out. Once I turn 40, it’s over. I’m trying to stop myself from crying my eyes out, or even curl up into a ball on the floor and sob hysterically. I fear I’m going to suffer a severe depression that will ruin all my focus on life right now. But I feel like a serious failure in life because there’s no love in it.

Does anyone have any advice? How can I cope with all this? #severedepression #BipolarDisorder #Bipolar1Disorder #Love #milestones #Aging #Relationships

Today’s random thought...😊❤️

I remember picking up my boys from pre-school and talking to them.
I asked non stop questions about their day, if they had fun ...and neither one could answer me. (Both were non-verbal)
If I didn’t speak we would have been in total Silence and I couldn’t handle that.

With Autism you just never know what’s going to happen.
It’s bizarre!
My son was able to sing little songs before he could talk...and if I asked either a question they couldn’t respond with a yes or no...
They could only repeat the last word of every question,
ME:” are you happy?”
HIM: “Happy?”
Geez I don’t miss those days...
The youngest is still very limited verbally (he’s 18 now) but when he was little and started getting words he and his brother (also autistic) had these AWESOME BRITISH accents!
“The children”, “the seaside”, “I’m
Very cross!”😂
It was from watching Thomas the Tank and repeating what they heard. Amazingly they used these lines in appropriate situations.
My youngest didn’t say a full sentence till 7years old...
it was “my name is Logan”❤️🤙and still struggles communicating.
My eldest has overcome it all, works, drives, attends college no one would know unless he told them.

You just never know what’s going to happen or when and if they’re going to progress.

If I could go back in time I’d tell myself to STOP worrying about hitting the milestones, STOP comparing my kids progress to others...
cause one day you’ll look back and wonder why you wasted so much time doing it...just enjoy the moment!
❤️🤙😉
(just my own personal thoughts)#Autism #Parenting #milestones #worry #autismmom