I feel guilty because I contributed to keeping her in the hospital. Her mental health has been deteriorating and they were going to release her after a week but she was saying homicidal and suicidal things on the phone. Had to tell the doctor. #PsychiatricHospitals
Today my mother is coming home from her 2nd #InvoluntaryHospitalization in 3 months for #BipolarDisorder #Mania #SuicidalIdeation #Selfdestructivebehavior . Any #Support and/or #Advice for me as her son who had to do this twice to #help during this time of much #Crisis Note: Please feel free to talk to me like I know nothing at all and am open to all. Grateful for any #ideas or #insights
I've heard of other people who've had a lot of success getting professional help and support for their mental health. So I went to gp, got referred for CBT I waited 4 months. I completed a 6 week program and was told if I felt I needed more I could go back to my gp for another referral , which I did but was put on a 6 month waiting list. Unfortunately it wasn't soon enough, something happened which triggered me to spiral before I knew it, my bf was calling paramedics for my stupid ass. I'm not sure if this is normal procedure for someone who had just tried attempting suicide, but I was sent home from the hospital immediately after being checked over by the doctor. My bf was furious, he drove me back to A and E and insisted they get me to crisis unit , it never happened and we went back home.
It took approximately 9 weeks of my bf, my sister and my mom trying to get me into a crisis unit with my self destructive behaviour getting worse by the second (I feel so ashamed when I look back at what I put my family through). I had multiple assessments within these 9 weeks at various private and NHS hospitals, but I was always told the same thing at end of a 2hr assessment that, I dont qualify for crisis help as I'm clearly very aware of my own mental health and therefore I cant be too much of a risk.
Well after my 7th or 8th assessment, I broke, I've been begging for help telling them I'm not ok, why can I not get help? Why was my cut up and bleeding arms and legs not enough proof that I'm not coping? Why was it this hard to get the help I was asking for ? I ran out of psychiatrist's office screaming, I ran out of the building and towards the oncoming traffic, I dont remember much apart being rugby tackled to the ground by the tiny blonde receptionist. And that's how I got sectioned.
I lost a lot of respect for mental health professionals, I feel they pushed me.
Since being in the psychiatric hospital, I'm traumatised, I dont know why I was under the impression they looked after people's mental health not destroy it more. Its It's now been a year and half since being completely out of psychiatric care. They only ever tried a couple of medications, but I had unbearable side effects from them and due to my physical health complications they ruled out trying any others. My only options are CBT ,mindfulness and meditation.
But I found myself resistant to any and all suggestions, sessions and advice .
Obviously I had to continue going to see my counsellor after coming out of the psychiatric hospital, but the minute I could, I got away from them.
After all, I got all could from them a heavy dose of trauma and then the suggestion to meditate...
I have done more for myself in the past year in half than they ever did for me over 4 years of interacting with the mental health system. . Am I the only one who does better taking care of my own mental health than going the professional route? #mental health #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #PsychiatricHospitals
I have no clue what I’m even doing here. I can’t take this anymore. I’ve almost been a while yet without a psychiatric hospital admission and I feel that coming to a quick halt. It’s been exactly 322 days since I was last in a psychiatric hospital. I keep holding on and pushing myself further and further. I just don’t want to do anything drastic. I’d admit myself the only thing is that this requires me to ask someone to take me and I don’t want to burden my family with that. If I get sent through the cops (Baker Acted) it’ll be worse off. I won’t be able to chose the hospital I go to, I’ll miss school, and still burden everyone. I don’t want it to get to this point. I also don’t want to attempt anything and fail. Also, if I attempt anything and end up in the hospital I’ll lose my therapist. I really don’t think I want to die though. I just want the pain to end and for this crappy situation to come to an end. My baseline is generally suicidal anyways and it just comes in waves of intensity. I’m able to tell when things are getting out of hand and right now I feel as though I’m getting to that place. This stuff always has the worse timing too...to escalate I mean. It’s my mom’s birthday on the 27th and I don’t want to ruin it by being in the hospital although I ruin everything already. The plan is to go out for a meal that Saturday. I hate eating in public anyways so it could be a good thing for me not to be there. Everyone would have a better time too. I’m supposed to see my school counselor for the last time before she goes on maternity leave next week too. I don’t know what to do or how to deal. I’m not asking for advice just wanted a space to share. #SuicidalThoughts #Suicide #MajorDepressiveDisorder #PsychiatricHospitals #collegestudent #Anxiety
#Pain #Depression #PTSD #Anxiety #PsychiatricHospitals #Grief #Hope
As I continue to grieve the loss of my Grandson, Tobias, I realised today that as much as I wish I could be immune from pain, pain is an inevitable part of living. And no one is immune from that. For some it will be physical pain, others, emotional pain. And pain by it’s very nature is really tough, it can be a useful and valuable tool. Pain can help us be more grateful, more compassionate and focus our lives on what really matters. Now, I am not looking for anymore pain. Right now I would love to ditch some. But with Gods help I want to find the meaning and purpose in my pain. I hope this blesses someone.
Yesterday while I was pounding away on the treadmill a friend rang to see how I was, not knowing I was in a psychiatric hospital. He asked if he could visit and today he came. What a blessing. He affirmed me, prayed with me and for me. Hugged me. What a gift. My congregation doesn’t know where I am. There would be too many questions. So great to have a friend who loves, without judgement or cliques.
Is it just me who refers to my psychiatric hospital as “the loony bin” or myself as a “nut job” or “crazy” or whatever I can think of.
I suppose if I call it/myself that first no one else can #Crazy #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #PsychiatricHospitals
Quick reminder that everyone’s experiences are going to be different so if you go to a hospital, your story will be different than mine!
I’ve talked about what it’s like going to the ER for psychiatric evaluations and now I’d like to discuss what it’s actually like once you’re in the psychiatric hospital.
Typically the first thing they do is check your belongings and take any contraband which can include: medications/vitamins, electronics, strings/belts/shoelaces, and anything sharp like paper clips, blades or glass. The show you to your room and you get settled in.
Meals generally go: breakfast at 8, lunch at 12, dinner at 5 and there’s usually snacks available in the kitchen area for any time of day.
Meds are in the morning and at night for most people but some had meds throughout the day as well.
Vitals were first thing in the morning.
The psychiatrist and their team which could have simply been a nurse or a whole group of people including nurses, therapists, medical doctors, medical students, and patient care coordinators would meet with each patient individually in the mornings Monday-Friday. The only time you’d see the team on the weekend would be if you were admitted during the weekend or Friday afternoon. This meeting is where meds and general treatment plans were discussed such as discharge dates and any progress or lack of progress being made.
Groups were run by either group therapists or mental health workers. Some were CBT based others were DBT based, it depended on the hospital. There were anywhere from 2 groups a day to I’d say 5 or 6 a day with weekends being pretty quiet and just hang out time.
One place I went had a computer but no Facebook was allowed.
Phones and tv were allowed any time that groups weren’t happening or during quiet time which was 11 pm - about 7 am. Some places had time limits on the phones other places didn’t.
There were board and card games as well as arts and crafts.
Different hospitals have different level systems and those levels determine privileges like going off the unit with the group, going out with family/friends, or being allowed to have shoes.
Nurses would check in with each patient each shift.
Checks were every 15 minutes meaning a staff member had to visually observe you unless you were in the bathroom in which case they would knock and you’d say your name.
At my last hospitalization they had made a new rule where each shift change the nurse would come in and do a room check to make sure nobody had secured any contraband.
You have to ask for pretty much everything including deodorant and soap.
The units I have been on were pretty tame. There were a few meltdowns but nothing major like some other places I’ve heard of.
Visiting hours varied depending on the hospital. Generally the visiting hours were longer on weekends.
I’m sure I’m missing something so if you have any questions about what I’ve written or want to know more about something just comment your question.
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