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    Struggling #RacingThoughts #Selfharm

    Having an extremely hard time tonight with Compulsive thoughts of self harm. I don’t want to do it but the thoughts won’t stop

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    Does not mix

    #BipolarDisorder #BipolarDisorder #Bipolar2Disorder #BipolarAffectiveDisorder #RacingThoughts

    This is a picture I colored in on an app. Not mine by any case.

    She was a wild woman


    Her eyes blazed

    with a burning fire

    Yet on the inside

    she was a burning mess

    an unstoppable fire

    blazed within her

    full of thoughts

    that would not stop.

    Cycling around

    over and over again

    they will never end.

    The medicine

    keeps them at bay

    if only

    for a little while

    The bipolar beast

    is sated

    in the never-ending war

    Today was a day of pain and never-ending racing thoughts. Seriously, they were all over the place and all concerning my health. Fears of being pregnant, fears of my teeth being loose, etc. None of these thoughts were based in reality.

    That's how I knew they were racing thoughts associated with Bipolar. Thankfully I had some risperidone on hand. That quieted the thoughts down quickly.

    I'm tired of it. The thoughts, the increased anxiety. I'm on birth control and it is driving me up the walls. I know I'm not my illness but it feels like it is taking a bigger part in my life right now.

    It's the nexplanon. Gotta be.

    I'm going off of it soon enough. Thank the fucking lord. Was NOT a fan of the mood swings and constant spotting. (TMI: sorries).

    I just hormonal birth control and Bipolar Disorder do NOT mix.

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    What is your common negative impact when going through #RacingThoughts ?

    At first I honestly thought my constant “squirrel” moments were from my ADHD side. Come to find out, racing thoughts are (for me) stem from my #BipolarDisorder . I never really viewed this as a bad thing.. until I finally realized why I was causing a lot of “hurt” in relationships; work, family, friends, romantic. My huge negative impact of my racing thoughts is interrupting people. When my mind goes 100mph, anything that is said within a conversation that triggers a thought that “needs to be said”.. I interrupt! Why? Because I know I’ll forget that thought easily!

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    How does your #RacingThoughts effect your work life?

    Typically racing thoughts focus on a topic. Tomorrow’s job interview, Monthly Manager Report, Team Meeting… often these are stress-related events. Once that topic is dead set in your mind, the anxiety sets in and the race begins. This happens or can happen when someone enters a manic/hypomanic episode. Personally, when I enter this “episode” I feel weak. Like I cannot focus on the subject at hand. I then begin to think: “well this won’t look great on my employee review”. I have no filter when speaking and a habit of spewing out my “racing” thoughts. This is a good and bad thing. Good for ideas to bring to the table. Then it’s bad when I don’t think before speaking.

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    Just want to vent

    After waiting months to get another therapist that's free once a week, my bro finally found one and she ended up triggering him a lot and sounded very inexperienced. I just wanted to vent on here because it seems as though his symptoms are getting slightly worse. I try not to bring up therapy too much cause i know sometimes he gets mad when I do. But im very angry that there's long wait times for people who need help. It's not fair and is very harmful to people who really need help. The state i live in passed something that was suppose to help reduce wait times but i have yet to see any changes. I feel so bad for him because i know he's struggling and there's nothing I can do but be there for him but im also not able to be in the mood to be supportive 24/7. Sometimes i want to just be in my room and try to give myself a break from the constant mood changes that happen to be negative and angry most of the time and severely sad along with the over thinking that makes the person believe that that's reality when it's really not. It's hard to watch someone mentally deteriorate and know that they want therapy but can't get 1 right away. It's hard to hear the things he says knowing it's his illness but it doesn't take away how much the words hurt. #venting #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #obsessivethoughts #RacingThoughts #Caregiving


    Racing thoughts in sleep?

    Hey, any of my fellow bipolar mighties ever experience racing thoughts or flight of ideas in your sleep and/or in your dreams? Lately some of my dreams are like that, and I was wondering if anyone else has experienced this or if it is unrelated to the bipolar 🤔🤷🏼‍♂️. #BipolarDisorder #Bipolar2Disorder #RacingThoughts #Mania

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    Found in You - A song to start your day.

    'Found in you' is a song about my simple desire to stop and find myself in God amidst the chaos and noise of this world, my mind, and life as a singer-songwriter.

    You can watch the lyric video here

    I hope that it will be a centering song for you, helping you to become aware of the beauty, sacredness, and loving presence of God available to you in THIS moment.


    #Christian   #MightyMusic   #Mindfulness   #jesuslovesyou   #Faith   #peace   #Anxiety   #Depression   #RacingThoughts   #Meditation   #Prayer   #BipolarDisorder #MightyPoets #Hope


    What do i say to my bro about him choosing to be off meds again?

    It's frustrating to me because i remember last time he was off his meds, he got extremely angry every day and was yelling at our parents and me at the top of his lungs EVERYDAY. He also started mentioning wanting to hurt us. His therapist advised him to get back on meds and after that he did. I'm feeling lost because I'm scared for our parents safety if he gets off of them again. Also i'm feeling annoyed because he's just deciding not to take them at all insteaad of slowley getting himself off of them which it's just going to make it worse for him and then we have to be there for him to lash it out on us. Im going to have a talk with him about it and let him know that last time he was off of it that we were all getting into it and that he was even balling up his fists towards me and dad and would mention wanting to hit everything glass and remind him that he broke his door. But i also know this is going to make him feel bad. I almost feel like he should move out if he's going to be off medication just because I work and also mostly our parents safety. I'm going to ask someone else that is a mental health worker how i should talk about it but i also wouldn't mind some feed back from anyone on here.
    #MoodDisorder #Bipolar #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #RacingThoughts #Caregiver