Insomnia

Join the Conversation on
Insomnia
48.9K people
0 stories
6.8K posts
About Insomnia
Explore Our Newsletters
What's New in Insomnia
All
Stories
Posts
Videos
Latest
Trending
Post

Mighty Family!!!! I have missed you guys so much and thought and prayed for you daily ❤️

Months ago I was at my very worst. My health had gotten so poor that I was fully bed bound and unable to do anything on my own. I also needed constant care with my memory getting so bad I forgot my name, who my family was, all friends a missing blavk hole where they should have been in my memory. I kept getting lost and confused not remembering basic words and my hands were still excruciating with their inability to work getting even more drastic. My pain was a 10+ though doctors only think pain is a 1 to 10 we know it still can rise to the thousands.

Suicidal thoughts were so bad I was actually planning though losing a best friend's to suicide at 15yrs old still kept me and will always keep me from taking a step no one can come back from that haunts family and friends and leaves things so very messy and heartbreaking.

My so-called pain doctor was still doing nothing after 3 years and countless appointments begging for help I'm any form. He kept me on the same teeny tiny dose for years and wouldn't try any other meds or any other options. I had had no episodes ever of overdose or failing any drug tests but still he refused to help at all despite my first appointment with him where he promised to help me get to where I could shower and dress myself daily.

I wanted to ditch him as my doctor soooo many times despite him being my third and last option since we hadn't been able to find any replacement.
I realized the stress and misery he brought me always and especially after every three month appointment. It wasn't worth the useless dose of medicine I was on. Many doctors left me in a lurch to taper off my meds on my own. I knew how to do it so I called and said I was dropping him as my doctor. From that moment on I felt relief like the biggest weight was gone. Yes my pain was excruciating but my mental health was the biggest mess because of so many doctors refusing to help and leaving me since I was 'too complicated for them'. They just didn't want to put in the work at time.

Why be a doctor if you don't want to help anyone?!

Steadily my mental health improved immensely. I had moments where I was happy though still in pain. Naturally I am a very optimistic and happy soul but moving to a new state and having the cruelest doctors unsurprisingly made me so much worse.

I have a home health nurse that actually wants the very best for me and that was priceless and enough.

And then I got a brilliant and lovely rheumatologist who actually asked intelligent questions, explained answers, and was invested in taking as much time as needed to finish solving my health. He UNDERSTOOD!!! And at my second appointment with him he told us the answers we had been searching for for 17yrs! Since I was 13.

On top of my many inherent diagnoses I had psoriatic arthritis spine arthritis, and rheumatoid arthritis!!!!
The thing that we all thought was lupus but just barely didn't fit was the psoriatic arthritis!
It was the last piece of a puzzle we had tried solving many a time.
Interestingly I had finally narrowed my research to these diagnoses and was months away from figuring it out too.
But I was very happy to have the answers early!

My first appointment with the rheumatologist he gave me arthritis medicine and WOW did it work and so much better than any medicine my hundreds of doctors over the years had tried.
My hands improved!!!! I had feeling in them again and was able to do so much more than I had since I was 16 when I had my waist down reconstruction surgeries that would lead to arthritis all over my body especially to where I was completely unable to use my hands by 17. It was so embarrassing and painful that my body seemed so intent on not working eight. Oh how I just wanted you be normal!!!

And my last but of good news is I at LAST got a new pain doctor after being without officially for three months. My mental health anxiety and depression had improved so that my stress and thereby my pain had decreased to #9 on the pain scale!!! After being a 10 for almost 8 years!!!!!

My new pain doctor was COMPLETELY the opposite of my last one.

From a guy who ALWAYS worse fancy suits and thousand dollar shoes to one in jeans and a t-shirt.
From a guy who never smiled and wouldn't put in time and effort to a guy who smiled the whole appointment and was ready and Excited to put in the work to help me live my very best life!
From a guy who was too proper and cold to one who was so friendly and happy about his job.
From one who was terrified of any teeny hit of using medicine to one ready to take any risk if it meant helping his patients be safe but with less pain.

My new doctor was like the twin of actor Vin Diesel and he was so SO SO tall!
Even better since the drive is so hard for patients to do always, he would do telehealth for two appointments, one in person, and then another two telehealth appointments etc. Yay!!!!! Hallelujah!!!
Lol I was and still am so happy! And he wanted a telehealth appointment a week after the first appointment yo make sure my new meds were the best option.

For YEARS I have wanted a doctor who was there to help always and one who helped me with my meds rather than drop me in a black hole and leave all alone to figure out and guess by myself. To actually be a TEAM and work together to help me help my body so I would LIVE like I had begged all my doctor to help me to no avail! I could have a LIFE that I loved and do fun things and spend time with my family!!!! No more sleeping life away in pain and misery and hopelessness!!!!
It only took 17 years! Haha!

So now I am BACK and back to my happy self. I still have aches and pains full body and I have all my health issues and more besides but I am in a better place than I have ever been.

All of your support and love and encouragement to take time for ME was what I needed. I am so thankful for it and for all of your help over these many years.

Now if only it could get easier to post with no problems like before I would dare to call life quite perfect right now ;) 🙏

So consider this a reminder thar life is worth it! If things suck now, just remember that if one day they come up with something that can help you and your conditions, I PROMISE you will want to be around then to live your best life.

Hold onto hope! DON'T GIVE UP!! Please please don't. Through sheer will and the grace of God I am still here and gosh do I look back now and say it was worth the wait I wouldn't want to relive it lol but having a possibility to go to the movies again and do fun things out in the world with my family? It is priceless! Please hold on. Please. You and your best life are worth it! You are Not alone in this.

I am cheering you on and I am on your side. Your happy is out there! You CAN do this!!!!

#AmplifiedMusculoskeletalPainSyndrome #Arthritis #Asthma #Anxiety #bedbound #ChronicFatigueSyndrome #CheckInWithMe #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #ComplexRegionalPainSyndrome #Depression #Disability #DistractMe #EhlersDanlosSyndrome #Endometriosis #Fibromyalgia #GastroesophagealRefluxDisease #HypothyroidismUnderactiveThyroidDisease #Grief #Insomnia #Lupus #Lymphedema #Headache #PosturalOrthostaticTachycardiaSyndrome #Psoriasis #PTSD #plantarfasciitis #PanicAttack #PanicAttacks #Psychosis #PsoriaticArthritis #RareDisease #RheumatoidArthritis #AnkylosingSpondylitis #MentalHealth #MemoryLoss #MightyTogether #SuicidalThoughts #Scoliosis #Migraine

56 reactions 24 comments
Post
See full photo

Bipolarism - the roller coaster ride that is your life

I think attitude is all in understanding manic-depression. When you are on a high, everything seems important, meaningful, significant (CS Forester ‘Only Connect…’). I think you unknowingly trample all over everyone and everything else because you become oblivious to their existence, blinded by the light of your godhood. You run on the fuel of enthusiasm, inspired by possibilities, then crash on empty (life as worthless, pointless, not worth pursuing – an endless repetition (the daily grind. Is this all there is?), throughout eternity. An existence with no hope of getting anywhere with anything and giving up all hope because of this: the empty, motionless vessel – the rusting hulk going nowhere).

Travel too fast and like a jet plane, your mind shatters into a thousand pieces (Virginia Woolf and her utterances turning from sentences, to phrases, then single words – devolved language, the joy of sound / vibration). It’s like pop songs, where you might not remember the words but you remember the feeling it invokes and its general rhythm or like a joke where you take the story (mystery) seriously but laugh at the outcome (punchline), which reveals the stupidity and meaningless of existence.

Could frustration at not being able to get your body to do what your mind wants it to do, be behind the violent temper and suicidal impulsiveness of the manic-depressive? Is paranoia from insomnia, down to the mind knowing something is killing it but not realise it is itself?

By the way this also applies to society as a whole. Like Ramsay MacDonald, the UK prime minister, I think war is suicide, not murder (destructive in a way peace is constructive).

As Soren Kirkegaard said ‘Life can only be understood backwards but lived (experienced) forwards.’ In other words we are always remembering the known past but imagining the (unknown) future.

Does a negative personality display itself in how it reacts to a situation and is this true of a positive personality also? For instance does a negative personality see what you say as a complaint because they are paranoid? Would a positive personality see it just as an explanation? In other words are we seeing the cusp of reality, where someone like Meghan Markle or Donald Trump (or even Stalin), would see this as an attack upon them personally because they suffer from a persecution complex but a more positive person would just see it as a comment, based upon how the person making the point is feeling at the time and what they are noticing? Does it leave you unaffected or send you into defence mode? Are you as the recipient of an innocent remark, astounded by the violent attack aimed at you by such a paranoid personality?

1 reaction 2 comments
Post

The system #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #OppositionalDefiantDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BipolarDisorder #CheckInWithMe

So my psychiatrist forgot to prescribe me one of my psych meds and now I’m out of them and I tried on different occasions today during business hours to contact her and inform her that I needed a script sent over and to inquire if she could prescribe me a sedative to help with my chronic insomnia and I got absolutely diddly from her because I have been up for almost two days I desperately need some sleep #Insomnia and now I’m at the emergency room praying that someone here will help with just enough medication 💊 for a few days to continue to try to get in touch with her. I do try to understand that she has more patients/clients than just me but my needs and concerns should be valid and I need help I’m trying to prevent a manic episode and avoid getting arrested or institutionalized because I’m out of meds

2 reactions 4 comments
Post
See full photo

When i thought i was over it ...... #CheckInWithMe #Trauma #PTSD #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Parenting #selfcare #Fibromyalgia

When you think you had gotten over a past trauma and those thoughts had been gone from your mind for a long time so you eventually thought you'd moved past it and were coping ......Only for today something to happen it and it has hit you like a truck going full speed!!!!You instantly go back to that specific point in you're life that you had tried so hard to overcome.You feel overwhelmed and overcome with so many different emotions.it actually physically takes your breath away while you feel sick with anxiety.You have been going through so much recently and some very challenging things yet this has completely knocked you, you're head is pounding hours after and the non stop overthinking is not helping.

This is something which completely caught me off guard today and has left me feeling physically and mentally exhausted......

#MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #CheckInWithMe #Fibromyalgia #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Endometriosis #PTSD #PTSDSupportAndRecovery #selfcare #Insomnia #Trauma #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #PostTraumaticStressDisorder

E-motion Diamanti - Italia

Emotion è un'azienda specializzata nella vendita di diamanti, gemme preziose e nella produzione di alta gioielleria in oro 18 kt. Spedizioni assicurate e tracciabili in tempo reale in tutto il mondo.
5 reactions 1 comment
Post

No sleep #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #Insomnia #OppositionalDefiantDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #CheckInWithMe #Depression

So I didn’t sleep at all last night and I need sleep 😴 everyone does and I don’t get to see my psychiatrist until next month but I can’t wait that long I need something prescribed for treating #Insomnia a medication 💊 specifically for that disorder I just hope I can get in touch with my doctor and see if she will help

7 reactions 2 comments
Post
See full photo

#Insomnia #BPD #Anxiety #Fatigue

Wow... what I long night. This is the second night that my good old brain kept me wide awake. My thoughts are so loud and scattered. I feel everything, and every movement takes so much effort. So the plan is to take it easy today and be gentle with myself. I thought this quote was hilarious! (sorry if some people don't get my humor)

29 reactions 9 comments
Post

Psychiatrist #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #OppositionalDefiantDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BipolarDisorder #Insomnia

So my new psychiatrist 👩‍⚕️ changed my meds around and they were helping get sleep now I’m not sleeping so good why do they always have to mess with stuff all because she didn’t agree that I should have been taking Xanax I hate life 😞

1 reaction
Post

Sleep 😴 #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #OppositionalDefiantDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BipolarDisorder #Insomnia

The medicine 💊 that I was on my psychiatrist switched it and now I feel like I can’t sleep 😴 anymore and I really don’t like it because what I was on seemed to be working but she didn’t like what I was taking so she changed it why I am always having to suffer in life

Post
See full photo

What does your “normal” look like?

Welcome to one of our favorite topics behind the scenes at The Mighty: the general concept of “normal,” what society implies when they say or use the label of “normal,” and most importantly, how our health conditions present for each of us and translate to our own personal definitions of “normal.”

So here’s what we’re asking: Think about a typical day in your life — it could be a high-symptom day, a moderate-symptom day, whatever you experience most regularly (maybe it’s even complete relief from emotional or physical pain!) — and describe what it’s like. Do you always have energy in the morning? Do you usually wrestle with insomnia? How’s your appetite? Do you follow the same routine day in and day out? Do you consistently take naps? Go to treatment?

However “normal” shows up for you, we’d love to hear about it. (And remember, however you are in whatever way you are, it’s enough!)

#MightyMinute #CheckInWithMe #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #RareDisease #Disability #Caregiving #Autism #ADHD #Grief #Parenting

59 reactions 26 comments
Post
See full photo

I’ve been on this wave length recently

I’m her— she is I —we’re working on it.

This week I’ve got plans of action, and posting here will leave me accountable — I hate going back on my word.

To focus on the things that I used to love again and reconnect with myself.

Really try to work on my sleep routine #Insomnia and finding a routine is difficult but… we will move along. If you have any tips please sos.

I’m the woman of 1000 journals and I’m going to attempt to create one based on daily shadow journaling.

I’m trying to get my mind back to a normal routine is the basis of week one.

I may start a night jog routine to burn my excess evening zoomies but my main concern is really figuring out a basic routine with my time of day being consistent.

I hope everyone has a beautiful week ahead of them #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

6 reactions 4 comments