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    Wow! Just wow. Last Monday I had double eye surgery. Ordered to go off my three times a day as needed Rx for ibuprofen ( twice the normal high dose OTC) Used in addition to other meds for my chronic pain and to held with my migraines. I had horrible migraines Tuesday thru Saturday. Jus stated Aimovig for my migraines ( ALL the research even that of the makers of Aimovig say it can cut the #s of Migraines in half monthly after 4-6 months. I’m a mess. My migraines are awful. I get 8 pills per my insulrance for 1 month. My practitioner is well aware I stockpile. Because I get cluster migraines- & if I can’t take all thre ibuprofen, coffee, and 1 migraine pill a day- or if they are horrible I take 2. Add it up by Friday I had taken the Aimovig earlier in the month but had 1 migraine pill left. Despite orders from my eye surgeon 2 days post surgery I’m taking the ibuprofen, drinking high octane coffee, and taking my rescue migraine medicine and all 3 of my low dose narcotic pills. Interestingly enough for 15 out of 30 days it’s ok if I take 3 of thes low dose narcotics but the other 15 I can only take 2. I’m running seriously short because I’m not comfortable taking all three of the highest dose ibuprofen you’ll even get in a hospital. One eye is horrible the other had a procedure to stave off a tear or blow out in the eye that still sees. She has turned on all the lights in the exam room- despite her tech making it as dark as possible with 1 light on. My chronic pain in my neck and shoulders are awful- because of the post op positioning and the rest of my chronic pain is worse than usual. I’m crying because She’s telling me Aimovig is 100% effective in eradicating all migraines about 2 weeks after injection and she’s fighting with me telling me the person at my insurance co, after reading her referral for physical therapy won’t go far, if at all, because she never put in my conditions and why She, the practitioner, thinks it will be helpful & maybe more recent ( than 5 years ago) contrast MRIs would help. She had written the referral only stating that “ the patient wants…” And that’s probably why I got only 4 weeks 2 years ago. She says I need psychiatric help and meds- like she expects someone with chronic pain has gone off the rails- having horrible migraines and overall increased pain isn’t from the surgery, post op positioning, etc. She writes a 1/2 ass second PT referral- I ask her to put at least a 2 month date stamp on it because I’m not seeing well, have no idea whether this eye surgeon will have the same physical restrictions and in the summer- 2 botched surgeries in my bad eye, and I’m not seeing well at all- so seeing my eye surgeon again a few times might be required before I can get PT and would she like his name and number. She finally says, in not so many words, that at the beginning of Jan I need to see the pain doc. Then Tuesday I go to the eye surgeon- the sight in my bad eye is, no change, horrible but has gotten much worse in my good eye. He tells me the migraines are due to anxiety. He’s been an eye surgeon since his residency. Having been in the medical profession I know a few things. Stress and anxiety can make regular headaches worse but are Not the cause of migraines but the pain from one eye and the extreme strain to try to see anything clearly along with everything else- especially severe light sensitivity in both eyes can. I kindly remind him anxiety doesn’t produce migraines but the worsened sight, extreme sensitivity to light, head and neck positioning all together could. He actually agrees. He admits though my eye structure in my good eye is perfect- him lazering part of my eye to tighten it could have caused problems with how images and light are now distorted ( fine before the surgery) He never warned me of this and it wasn’t in any papers I signed. I have a call into his cell because at night I have severe astgmotism- the lights are crazy and the depth perception is gone determining how far away cars or traffic lights are. I got home, driving incredibly slowly and carefully. He was better than the pain practitioner. I admit seeing badly in both eyes is both terrifying and anxiety producing. But to be shoved into ‘ You may be drug seeking, you need psych meds, and your migraines are all from anxiety- Well it brought back every time I’ve seen a doc who dismissed my symptoms, refused to run tests ( that when they were run found a bio- physiological problem) & used the ‘ crazy lady’ routine. All because I wasn’t all put together and not complaining or nicely correcting them on centuries old- just put it down ( to quote Freud but still used by multiple docs today) as a hysterical woman. I know a man would have been treated differently in both situations! It’s as belittling as the old way men used to assume women were dumb when they went to buy or get a car fixed. Probably some still do. WHY? Because Ihave breast? No. Because it’s easier to pigeon hole. A patient than to listen carefully- a female patient! Uggh. Flashbacks and feeling like they’d rather disrespect me and my concerns and paste a label on me. Did you know Nurses get the most psych training in school and rotations before getting their RNs and it’s extremely minimal. Most docs and PAs will admit they got 1 day to 1 week of psych theory in school- yet they’ll still use labels they don’t even comprehend instead of taking 5 or 10 more minutes to HEAR you! I guess the 10 minutes per patient regardless is true. It’s been said by many docs and practitioners brave enough to come forward that billable hrs- seeing 3-5 per hr is what companies demand. What price are we paying as patients to pay for/ or part of our insurance and still have most docs pushing us out the door ? A lot! Unless you have premium insurance , a doc that can afford to listen, or both! What a flippin week. Just pray my eye surgeon either recommends what type of glasses will take care of my sight problemS. And I guess I’ll deal with the pain doc with kit gloves so my meds aren’t taken away or lessened and my Primary can at least write a Rx for me to see a spine and joint doc to get new MRIs done. Yeah I both need and want PT. It sucks not working and of course I didn’t get SSDI because I didn’t have people in my life then who knew docs that could get it for me- because that’s what you need in my State- connected docs! Thanks for letting me vent! I was doing well with ‘docs’ for a long time after a lot of docs who pigeon holed me and it took months or years to get the right care!# Doc PTSD Returns # between insurance reimbursement and the goats was on drugs we’re screwed # pray I can drive again at night!

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    #BPD #ADHD #TreatmentresistantDepression

    #hospital#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder Uhh 😬🥴 I've been struggling horribly for the last year. My confidence is 0. I'll be 38 in 3 weeks and I can't even hold a job. My marriage is a s!!t show and I've been trying so hard to fix it that that's all I'm doing. My first grandchild was born 2 weeks ago and I can't even concentrate on him or my daughter.
    How do you completely start over? Rebuild your life with no education, no family to fall on while living in a podonk town that's got NOTHING to offer. #MentalHealth #Suicide #s #borde #insom

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    × " A Rough Stressful Day At Work I'm Not Cut Out For The Restaurant Industry " × #MentalHealth #Depression #anxeity #s .A.D#Insomnia

    × " Today Was A Crazy Day... I Had A Male Customer Yell At Me Over A 20 Cent's Diffrence Over 1 Taco.... Then Another Customer A Woman... Yelled At Me Too... She Took Out All Of Her Anger Out On Me... Because Of Her Kids Driving Her Nut's... Why Can't People Be Prepared When They Order... Then I Had Another Customer Hold Up The Line For 15 Mins.. Because They Couldn't Decide On What To Eat... We Have An App Use It.. I Almost Had A Breakdown At Work... I Truly Hate Dealing With People... " × #StressedOutDay ☆ S.K. ☆

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    × " Who Is SKADI KVITRAVN.. " × #I 'amUnique#AndILiveWithDisabilite 's

    × " I'am The Kind Of Person Who Is Mysterious And Opinionated... Shy... Introverted... With A Dry Sense Of Humor... I Will Open Up To People 1-1... Not In Group Setting's.. I Live With #ChronicPain #CerebralPalsy #P .T.S.D#s .A.D#Depression #Anxiety ..#sexualassultsurvivor#formermilitarywife..#mother ....I'am Kind.. Supportive..And Have A Huge Personality.. That Come's With A Massive Pure.. I Work Hard For The Thing'sThat I Want Or Don't Have In My Life... I Deserve Alot " × 🖤 ❤❣❤🖤 Sincerly, ☆☆ ☆ SKADI KVITRAVN ☆☆☆

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    Spring time #bpb #DID #PTSD #Bipolar #Anxiety #Migraine #Pain healing #arthitis #s #suicideattempt #deppression #

    Trying to keep up the face for people but sometimes it is very hard to do . Has anyone else ever felt like they have to put on a mask to the outside world .

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    × What's Your Favorite Type's Of Music? × To Help You Distress x Relax ?#ListSomeOfYourMusic .

    × My Different Type's Of Music Are Unique To Fit Me x My Personality And My Mood. ☆ 1. Payton Parrish • 2. WARDRUNA ▪︎ 3. SHAMAN'S HARVEST • 4. TRIVIUM • 5. The HU ▪︎6. HALESTORM ▪︎7. Art Of Dying • 8. In This Moment • 9. Like A Storm ▪︎10. Five Finger Death Punch ☆ There's More But So Far That's My Music List For My Episode's. #P .T.S.D#s .A.D#Anxiety #Depression

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    x IS IT HORRIBLE TO FEEL VERY DISCONNECTED FROM FAMILY MEMBER'S ? x # T.W. 🚨 #MentalHealth

    x EVER SINCE MY DAD DIED FROM CANCER. I HAVE NEVER FELT SO ALONE. I HAVE NEVER FELT CONNECTION'S WITH MY MOTHER. AND NOW MY SIBLING'S. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE NO ONE. I DIDN'T HAVE A REAL RELATIONSHIP WITH MY MOTHER SHE WAS VERBALLY & PHYSICALLY ABUSIVE TOWARD'S ME AND MY TWIN BROTHER. AND EVER SINCE I WAS SEXUALLY ASSAULTED. IT'S LIKE I CAN'T MAKE ANY KIND OF A CONNECTION WITH ANY HUMAN. I'M FINE WITH JUST TALKING TO OTHER'S ONLINE. BUT IN REAL LIFE I DREAD COMMUNICATION WITH MY OWN ADOPTED FAMILY. AND THEY GET MAD AT ME FOR NOT TALKING. WELL WHO WOULD WANT TO TALK TO ANY FAMILY MEMBER'S. WHO DON'T LISTEN. TO WHAT I'M SAYING.. I'M LIKE ALWAY'S TALKING TO WALL'S ABOUT MY MENTAL HEALTH. AND IF I SAY THAT I HAVE #P .T.S.D x #s .A.D x # DEPRESSION x #Anxiety DISORDER'S. I'M TOLD THAT I'M MAKING UP THING'S AND THAT I'M NOT SICK. MY FAMILY DOESN'T BELIEVE IN #mental ILLNESS IT'S A STIGMA! THEN WHAT DO YOU CALL A # LEARNING DISABILITIES. I SWEAR SOMETIME'S. I CAN'T TALK TO PEOPLE ANYMORE. #rant

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    x THE LITTLE REASON'S WHY I 💜 WRITING POETRY x #MyMightyFamily

    x IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF ALL OF YOU... YOUR SUFFERING...PAIN..HEARTACHE.. CHRONIC ISSUE'S...ALL OF THAT... I SEE AND READ ALL OF YOUR STRUGGLE'S... THIS IS WHY I MAKE POETRY..TO HELP EASE SOME OF YOUR PAIN... YOUR SADNESS...I WRITE..TO BRING JOY..A SMILE.. COMFORT...TO ALL OF YOU IN NEED OF A PICK ME UP!..WEATHER. IT'S A FUNNY QUOTE..A NORSE POEM..ETC... I ENJOY WHAT I DO ON HERE..IT BRING'S ME...PEACE..AND HEALING..ON MY OWN ROAD TO RECOVERY..FROM MY DAILY CHRONIC PAIN.#CerebralPalsy #P .T.S.D#s .A.D#Anxiety #Depression . You All Have Helped Me So Much With My Divorce...And My Mental Health. SO THANK YOU! SO MUCH I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU SO MUCH. YOU ALL MEAN THE WORLD TO ME. 🌹 SINCERELY, YOUR FAVORITE POET.. SKADI KVITRAVN 🎭

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    My Mum❤️💙

    The most important thing that i learned from my mum is that one should never give up hope.She has been suffering from extremely painful tragiedies since 14 years and she had thought of suicide many times but she has a hope that one day i will be grow up and she will see a day full of happiness.She has never given up this hope.

    I am suffering today but i am sure one day there will be miracles in my life when i will breath the new fresh air and give my mum days full of happiness.
    #Anxiety #PTSD #s #suicideattempt ##PTSD # #Depr #MentalHealth 🍁🍁

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    x Having An Episode Currently...I Try To Tell People How I'm Feeling....Why Bother ? 😤#Depression Episode

    I Haven't Slept Very Well In The Last Few Weeks Lately x My Episode's Are More Intense With Crying Myself To Sleep From My Chronic Low Back Pain... My #CP Is No Joke I'm In So Much Severe Pain.. I Can Barely Walk.. That's Why I Don't Go Out Much. My #PTSD # S.A.D x Are Non 🛑. One Day I'm Happy The Next Day..I Feel So Alone With My Physical 🥀 Mental Disabilities.. My Family Think's That I Make This Up To Avoid Getting A Job And I'm 🛑 I Did Work Before My Marriage Ended x I Wish They Got Educationally Involved In Studying What #cerebral PALSY..#PTSD ..#s .A.D x Are & What They Do To Someone Everyday. I'M 🚫 LAZY NOR I'AM UNMOTIVATED. I Really Feel Like I Can " NEVER " Do Anything Right In My Family..I Will Never Be Good Enough...😔😤😭#Depression Episode

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