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What Doing Martial Arts As A Person With an Invisible Disability Means to Me
This has been such a learning experience for me, so I’m going to list these in the order that I decided/discovered them.
1. It Means Being Committed:
I was kinda tricked into an 18 month contract with this MMA program, in part thanks to my ADHD impulsivity. However, I feel like it ended up being a good thing, because it doesn’t give me n easy out, and I want to show my kids that they can persevere to their goals, even when it’s not easy.
2. It Means Radical Acceptance:
I can’t do everything the way the kids, or even the other adults might be able to, no matter how much my competitive instinct wants to. The other adults who have actually stuck with the program as long as I have are all fit men with a background in various forms of Martial Arts. I spent the majority of 2020 and the first half of 2021 bedridden from a combination of Fibromyalgia, depression, and some undiagnosed sleep disorder, and I’m obese. It will take time for me to get to where I want to be, if it happens, at all. Thanks okay, because however far I get, I’ll be stronger, healthier, and more confident than when I began, because I already am!
3. It Means Choosing Health:
This applies in SO many ways, actually. Most importantly, it means stopping when it hurts, and sitting before falling over. Now, I’m not saying that I take a 20 minute break when my knuckles get sore from punching the pad what feels like a thousand times in a row. However, when I feel my asthma kicking in, I break for my “2 puffs” of my emergency inhaler, and a drink of ice water. When my knees and ankles start giving out, I either modify, or take a break until the next activity. When I feel like my face is going to connect with the mat at any moment, or I realize I can’t walk a straight line, I go take a break. Usually, it’s less than 3 minutes. Just enough for me to get a second wind and I can hit the mat, feet first, not face planting. 😅
4. It Means Being Prepared:
Not only do I need to have my gi (uniform) and belt ready to go, like everyone else, as well as my kids’, but I have knee and ankle braces, which I wear for support every time, mine and my daughter’s emergency inhalers, water for all 4 of us, and ibuprofen at least an hour before class.
5. It Means Not Needing Approval:
Like everyone else, I have my “Court of Critics”, who judge my health, my productivity, finances, my children’s education, and more. I’ve finally decided I have my husband’s approval and God’s, and that’s all I need!
6. It Means Being Awesome:
I’ve always loved reading books about female protagonists who can totally whip someone’s butt at a moment’s notice. Seriously, how cool is that?
I was feeling really frustrated and defeated, after MMA, tonight, so I decided to write this to put it all back into perspective. 😉
#Fibromyalgia
#Spondylolisthesis
#MajorDepressiveDisorder #ADHD
#Anxiety
#Parenting
