Suicidal Thoughts

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Suicidal Thoughts
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I'm new here!

Hi, my name is PAWidow2024. I'm here because I want a safe place to talk about my suicidal thoughts without there being any danger of being "reported" and thrown into an institutional mental health situation. I've had thoughts about and wishes to exit the planet since I was a young girl (I'm now in my late 60s) but relationships have always kept me from it. Now, after the death of my sweet husband of 32 years, I have no close relationships to keep me here. No children or grandchildren, no close friends. I live in an area where I don't fit it very well (I'm non-religious, left-leaning and childless) so all my efforts to date to find "friends" have not worked out. Also, I'm essentially a loner/introvert so that impacts my friend-making efforts too. I just really think I would benefit, though, from being able to candidly discuss my current thoughts with someone who can understand all these different factors.

#MightyTogether

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Self sabotaging behaviour

I’m the one with EUPD amongst other mental and physical heath conditions and I can’t seem to stop self sabotaging my relationship with my wife. I love her unconditionally but she is pre menopausal and I think that how she is feeling after nearly 2 decades of looking after me is catching up with us and I’m worried she’s going to leave me. I have suicidal thoughts and self harm, but I cannot get past these thoughts and I’m feeling so lost.

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