trustissues

Slight vent////

As I said above, I don't know how I got so lucky. In what way might you ask? Well, to put it simply, my relationship.

My current relationship it's the longest I've been in. a year next month. And I don't know how they still want to be with me.

I have ADHD, Depression, Anxiety (social), Gender dysphoria, Pedophobia, Abandonment issues (Anxious attachment style), and trust issues which can make relationships hard for me. I get easily attached to people, with that lingering feeling that I'm going to be abandoned. Not very fun.

I've had people (mainly friends) just randomly stop talking to me with no reason. And I mean like, most of my friends ever.

My first relationship was pretty toxic, but I stayed with that person because I felt reliant on them. My next relationship went pretty well until they broke up with me and decided then that everything was wrong with me.

So going into this relationship was slightly scary for me. But I am very, very glad I did. I would not change a single thing about my partner. They love me, for me. We are both aromantic which is nice because I don't feel forced to be romantic. We are both Lgbtq in some way which is also very nice.

We are long distance, very long distance, but they still find time to talk to me. We talk almost 6 hours a day when I'm at school. I know them, they know me, and we respect each other. We understand each other's problems and whenever I need reassurance or validation (which I see myself needing a lot of) I know I can reach out to them.

I feel pretty emotionally neglected by my male guardian, which I hate to admit as he tries so hard to make sure I'm healthy, but is just not very good at helping with my emotional problems and always tries to change the subject or say "Well I know exactly how you feel because ....." and I hate saying this but that doesn't help me at all? Is that okay? Or am I asking for to much?

But I know I can turn to my partner for any emotional validation I need. I've never felt that way with someone.

#Depression #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #SocialPhobia #Pedophobia #ADHD #abandonmentissues #trustissues #neglect #MentalHealth #MightyTogether #GenderDysphoria

Hello everyone, I posted a question yesterday and it seemed to do pretty well so I decided to ask another.

This time I will be asking about books (Who doesn't love a good book every now and then?)

What's your favorite book/book series? (Again, don't feel pressured to answer)

I'll start

I am a huge fan of the series Warriors (Warrior cats) and Wings of Fire as I can relate to some of the characters and in my opinion the books are actually well written.

#MightyTogether #Depression #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #SocialPhobia #MentalHealth #ADHD #Pedophobia #Paranoia #trustissues

Vent////

So I sometimes take online "Do you have -" quizzes just for fun. I never take them seriously (I am not a self-diagnoser) and I recently took a "Do you have abandonment issues quiz" because I was bored. I got "You Most Likely Have Trust Issues."

I sat there for a couple seconds before I announced to myself, 'I have both.'

Which also led me to think 'Its not noticeable.'

If you were to ask one of my parents if I had trust issues or abandonment issues, they might say no. They blame my lack of communication with strangers on my Social Anxiety.

I've talked about this before I think, but I don't like to talk to people because I fear being abandoned. I currently only have 1 friend and a partner who I talk to as I'm to nervous to branch out. Because 1, I am afraid that I will be ghosted again like every other friend in the past 2, I don't trust many people and 3, i am just nervous about starting conversations.

But here's the truth. I mask most of my feelings around my parents. I only recently told them about my Paranoid thoughts. Are they taking it seriously? Oh of course not.

When my mom encourages me to make new friends I just tell her "I'm just to nervous." not about why or about that fact I don't want to deal with more pain that comes with being abandoned. I really can't. And I don't tell anyone because I don't want to seem like some selfish, self-centered trans kid who wants attention from everyone because I can't get my gender right.

I'm lost. I've been feeling less and less emotions lately. When I laugh, I don't understand why. It just seems like a thing I just do without thinking to cover up my pain. And then i find myself going on and on about my life like this and I start to feel bad. Like I'm just taking up space on the platform.

#abandonmentissues #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #SocialPhobia #trustissues #Depression #LGBTQ

I am incredibly hurt. A friend I met here has been ignoring me for no reason. I trusted him. He just...I needed him the other day and he said he'd be there. but he wasn't. #bestfriend #trustissues #Men

I’ve been trying to deal with my overthinking…..I’m so down on myself right now and my bf is doing his own thing without a care in the world…..why is he still with me? If hes talking to other females? I don’t know how much more I can take….

My Story - I have bpd and I grew up in a household that was very unique/Strange. Well onlookers saw us as strange but as a child growing up it seemed very normal. I had no clue that both my parents were narcissistic. But looking back on things my dad was always leaving us mom would always get angry and take it out on me and my siblings. This happened for years. They said I didn't start talking till I was 2 years old, but I can remember dissociating at age 5 didn't know it was called that then, but it really sucked! My mom regularly invalidated me like it was some kind of game or something, but she had her own thing going own from her childhood and would zone out most of the time. This a chapter out of my childhood. From this I have trust issues and abandonment issues#trustissues #MentalHealth #MentalIllness #abandonmentissues #BPD

I refuse to open up about my mental health and childhood sexual abuse in any future romantic relationships. My X used my sexual abuse against me. He also used my mental illness against even though he had bipolar disorder and schizoaffective disorder. I don’t trust anyone. #trustissues ##SexualAbuse #majordepressivedisoder #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #PTSD

How can I deal with my boyfriend meeting up with another girl? For context, she used to be in love with him and, whilst he never reciprocated, she never seemed to get the message. Fast forward 2 years of dating and she still asks to meet up with him whenever he is back home. He often obliges because he sees her as a good friend. He also had a history of not telling me they have met up so I don’t get angry with him but if anything it just makes me all the more paranoid and more suspicious.
He is not willing to cut her off but I don’t know how to cope with the paranoia and anxiety. I trust him with literally any other person but when it comes to her I have 0 trust when it comes to her.
#trustissues #relationship #Anxiety