paranoia

I know that they are both symptoms of #PTSD but they seem to be getting in the way recently. It's little things that startle me not to mention lesser known things like people being upset with me. When triggered I tend to react strongly (and sometimes hurt someone in the process). In DBT therapy I am learning to regulate my emotions but I feel like that goes out the window when I'm triggered. I was diagnosed with #PTSD in 2019 and I take meds for the nightmares but I don't think that does much for being easily startled and reacting strongly. Does anyone else struggle like this?

#Trauma #PTSD #Abuse #AbuseSurvivors

*Not to mention the paranoia that comes on sometimes if I'm really anxious. That just makes things worse. #Anxiety #Paranoia

My anxiety induces paranoia. Does anyone else deal with this? #Paranoia #BipolarDisorder #PTSD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Anxiety or is it just #Psychosis ?

Have you ever had someone trigger you intentionally to see how you react? Maybe this is just in my head. But I’m very reactive. So, for example, someone says something triggering, I flinch. And what I find is some people suddenly start saying related things more and more and more. And I’ll catch them watching me sometimes. And I think they are trying to see if my reaction is tied to their comments. I think they are curious for whatever reason.

But it’s awful to experience. I don’t want attention brought to this. The more they do it the more amped up my nervous system is and the harder it is to be normal. And I know what they are doing. But at the same time I feel paranoid because would someone really do this? They are likely just having a normal discussion and the ptsd is causing my paranoia to kick in because I was triggered. #PTSD #Paranoia

I am trying to understand the occurrences I’ve been having. I feel as if people are constantly speaking badly about me and it’s becoming harder and harder to be in social situations.

It’s stems from being immersed in actual occurrences.

I once spent an entire summer cutting my front lawn with only scissors. The grass was knee high when my dad and I moved in, and we didn’t have a mower. People who came over to visit would make jokes or comments about how our house would look really nice if only we would cut the grass. I would get upset and embarrassed because with no mower and no money to buy one I felt my hands were tied and their remarks unhelpful. After a few of these visits and dwelling on them constantly because that’s what I do, l overthink everything, self loathing, berating myself, becoming so anxious, I become paranoid. Anyway, I found a pair of metal scissors and I went out and sat in the grass and started in one corner of the yard and by weeks end I had finally cut down all the tall grass, but the grass where I started was already beginning to grow tall again, so I would get up early the next morning and begin again. Everyday I did that for an entire summer. I also worked as a cleaner for a realtor who bought old homes and rehabilitated them for resale. I finally saved up enough money to buy a push mower. But as crazy as people found it and me to have cut my grass with scissors (none of them ever thought about helping me by coming over once a week to with cut my lawn or let me use their mower), I found something out about myself. I’m a problem solver. Regardless of what obstacles are in my path, or how crazy I can, and most likely will, make myself, I will solve the problem, eventually. #overthinker #OCD #Paranoia #Anxiety #Depression #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #stop !

I’m having #Mania and #MixedMania episodes at work. I get #Derealization #Paranoia and overly goofy. I think my coworkers see this. Klonopin helps a little. What else can help me?

Fe fi fo fum the giant stomped
Then the doorbell rang
Fairies danced, and crickets sang
Something to sell by the Light of the Moon
All bottled up, and Shining, glittering like gold
A dizzy, spinning dancing to tune
To catch the eye, the ear, and mesmerize
Turn up the heartbeat, and raise the spirits
Lock you in it's fantasy, make you lose reality
The side effects are severe, and Fabintasy is nightmare in reality
You hit the ground, you look around, how had you not seen
The warning was there, but it was disguised, you see
The Rhythm and Melody, LED you away from where it lay
Mixed and mingled in words of romantic play
The lyrics and meanings lost as you danced along
All caught up in the Rhythm, and beat, and the melody
#BipolarDisorder #Mania #psycoticbreak #Paranoia #Delusions