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All through my childhood, and now my youth the one that I desperately wanted to change was my #skincolour .... The way I look has been the source of all my problems, or at least that's what my parents thinks.... My anxiety and zero #bodyconfidence has started since and I don't know how to stop this ! How to stop this low feeling that I always feel whenever I see myself in the mirror ?! Why can't I stop it?! Why can't my parents & my relatives stop being so mean about my body?! Why ?!

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5 weeks post op!

Took this afternoon. Actually feeling quite proud of myself. It's been a bloody hard few weeks, with lots of hiccups. But I'm getting there. Had a really smooth bag change last night. I've not been feeling myself, mental health wise, but today I've been feeling more positive about it all.
#Urostomy #Ostomate #FowlersSyndrome #InterstitialCystitis #Ostomy #OstomySurgery #EndTheStigma #MentalHealth #spoonielife #bodyconfidence #I#icandothis


how am I going to deal with my body shaming mother over Christmas break in a warm place?

my family has planned a trip somewhere warm near the water for Christmas and I’m going to be in a swimsuit hopefully (or at least doing my best to) enjoy myself.... but my mom my whole life has commented on my body and how I would look better if I was skinnier, more fit, worked out a part of my body, etc.... I have recently put on about 30 pounds (I’m 5’0 tall... so it’s quite a bit on a small frame)... I the last time she saw me in a swimsuit she made comments and faces.... I have no idea what to do... this has caused me a lot of anxiety and pushed me towards eating disorders in my past (for which I have been recovering from over the past 3 years with help from my amazing partner)..... what should I do? please help.... #BodyShaming #bodyconfidence #BodyPositive #BodyImage #Anxiety #Depression #EatingDisorders #anorexiarecovery


My Body

My body it's supposed to be my temple so to speak, I'm supposed to feel confident and pride in this body of mine, but yet I feel like I'm in a cell trapped inside a body that I dont feel comfortable in. So how do you love yourself? Do you hate yourself less or try to love yourself more? Unspeakable things come to mind as I look in the mirror, at a body that I want to shed from because society doesnt look at me the way they look at the prettier thinner girls, they see this! a person who's wearing oversized clothing to hide something that shouldn't be shamed a tummy, thighs, love handles, or stretch marks, sometimes not even a body of overeating or unhealthy life styles, just from health issues or even from carrying a beautiful soul for 9 months.
Not even the thoughts of losing weight, but changing the body you were once comfortable in because society makes you feel weak and vulnerable, you want to look good not only to the people who see you in public, but to the person you love the most because you feel worthless and unacceptable because of how you look, wanting to fix how my body looks making it thinner and plumper in some spots making certain places bigger or less unperked. It feels so wrong to think, but yet it feels so right because maybe if I looked a bit more presentable I'll feel better about how I look. new clothes or hair wont fix it, but a body transformation because being 135 pounds again and fit them clothes would be everything, but why was it even then I felt the same way? It's not my anxiety or depression because why would I care so much of this maybe it is though and I dont want to admit it.
My body is my temple and I want to change it my motivation sucks right now and I know diets dont work, its going to take the long way, hours of hard work outs and eating no sugars or unhealthy carbs, but even when I reach that goal I know I still wont be happy again, why? Because being bigger or smaller than size 25 wont matter because its in the eyes of the beholders, being 5 foot 3 and a size 23 they would still consider me over weight, my breasts still not as perky as they once were without a boob job would be unacceptable and non pleasing, and my lips looking lifeless without one more pinch of filler because fuller is better. doing numerous butt workouts and tummy tucks still wont get rid of that mama pouch, but you'll still look hotter than before right?
society is falling into beauty and cosmetic surgarys so if I dont have any am I really at my best.
My body is my temple so do I want to change it my way or the way society wants me to.
Ceara Poitras
#body #Anxiety #Depression #Thoughts #Acceptance #loveandhate #bodyconfidence #Love #hate #mybody #yourbody #Society #Selflove #Selfhate #cosmetics #surgaries