HeyEmma

So another day and another room in the house sorted.Going to bed tonight feeling a bit better that I am slowly but surely getting there and the fact that I am really trying !!

Still alot to get done in the house but atleast both their rooms are all fixed and now this is done.
I'm physically and mentally exhausted, my body is in agony and I know I'm really pushing it these past few days but it does feel good being able to go into bed and knowing I've managed to get so much done and when I wake up I'm waking up to it being tidied and sorted and can then focus on the rest.
One little thing at a time I've been giving myself and trying to help my anxiety and depression through the days as I was really at my worst and being surrounded by things I hadn't got done ,mess, daily stuff I should have been doing but couldn't due to my pain or my depression being too overwhelming and it was all making me so much worse especially when each day I don't know how I'm going to feel, how bad my pains going to be or if il even have the strength to do what I have too.

Not slept really now anymore than 2/3 hours for last 3 nights ,it's my second night of new medication so hopefully can get a bit of a sleep ,wake up not feeling as rubbish and sore tomorrow and can try get some more done.
So hopefully tomorrow can be another positive day ♥️

#MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #Selfcare #PTSD #COVID19 #longcovid #loveyourself #GeneralParenting #Parenting #CheckInWithMe #Insomnia #Upallnight #SkinCancer #Endometriosis #Bekind #AloneTogether #HeyEmma

Well after the past few weeks of stressing and overthinking, today I go in for another 3 biopsy surgeries !!Just getting ready to leave and my anxiety is through the roof,I know they're going to be bigger this time and more awkward, also because of where they are will be difficult to heal so have to rest!!

Hopefully won't be in too long and will be able to get home to my bed and then just relax.

Hate this part 😭🙈

#MentalHealth #CheckInWithMe #Insomnia #Upallnight #SkinCancer #Endometriosis #COVID19 #longcovid #loveyourself #GeneralParenting #Parenting #Anxiety #Depression #Bekind #Toxic #Abuse #youmatter #beyou #PTSD #Cancer #HeyEmma

When you finally remove someone who only causes you anxiety and constant negativity it really makes a huge difference. Its as though eventually something just clicks and you see it so clearly.All those times of accepting the crap , letting things go when you shouldn't tolerate it , letting it get to a point where it really just messes with your head and causes so much more anxiety and hurt. It had just clicked and I thought WTF has been wrong with me ??Why have I allowed this to effect me so much ?? Why have I let it tear me apart and loose myself while putting up with it for so long??

When it happens it's like You actually feel so differently about that person now , you just see them for the negative , selfish , maniplulative person that they are.
There's no more chances, you don't even want to argue or fight because it's way past that now your just done with it all.
When there's so many more negative things than positive that a person brings to you or causes you that's when you know its got to stop.

The anxiety feels lighter to handle , you feel like your not trapped inside your own head with it all anymore.

No one should treat you this way but if they do it's such a relief when you finally get the strength to see it as it as and understand that removing them will make your life so much easier .

#MentalHealth #CheckInWithMe #Insomnia #Upallnight #SkinCancer #Endometriosis #COVID19 #longcovid #loveyourself #GeneralParenting #Parenting #Anxiety #Depression #Bekind #Toxic #Abuse #youmatter #narcissist #AloneTogether #HeyEmma

I've been getting Biopsy surgeries for over 5 years now due to the previous skin cancer.Ive had over 30 Biopsy surgeries, I usually just get any done there and then at my check ups ,but my last appointment few weeks ago was told have to have another 3 done and this time I've had to wait .I go in on Monday morning. This has really made my anxiety million times worse because I've had the time to worry, overthink, stress about the procedure , pain,stitches, recovery and then the wait on results.
This time I'm really worried as one of the areas they're going to remove has gotten so much worse over past few weeks which isn't a great sign ,but also I could just be well overthinking it due to being so anxious.

I know I'm really lucky as I've only ever needed the surgeries for my Melanoma which is alot luckier than some people.

I purchased a diffuser today with lavender oil and it has a colour changing effect ,I am using this tonight to try and reduce my anxiety.

The overthinking, worrying, feeling guilty as kids are away till next week now so I can rest for few days after the surgery without them seeing me struggle for first few days, yet I feel bad not going to see them for a bit .While also anxious because my 8yo is starting to question it all and has been worrying so I'm really wanting it to not effect them or make them struggle.

Everything is really overwhelming justnow ....
Just wish I could make my head stop or even slow down for a bit and be able to relax

#MentalHealth #CheckInWithMe #Insomnia #Upallnight #SkinCancer #Endometriosis #COVID19 #longcovid #loveyourself #GeneralParenting #Parenting #PTSD #Cancer #Anxiety #Depression #Selfcare #Toxic #Abuse #youmatter #beyou #HeyEmma

I'm really going to try , not tonight as I'm gutted that I wasn't able to go out as I know it probably would have been a great night and I'd have enjoyed it once out ,well that's my positive thinking I may felt uncomfortable and overwhelmed and came back home because not are the last time I was out with the girls or in any environment like that.

But I'd have been happy I went atleast and tried that's a massive step I'd say.
But the fact I got all ready and then let my head ,and all the negative stuff and my insecurities get the better of me I'm gutted !!I'm angry qnd frustrated at myself that on top of everything else I couldn't do it ! Especially after always saying no for so long recently and feeling a little excited qnd got myself all ready. The fact I am now currently in bed I am gutted at myself , frustrated and angry that this is another thing now I am suffering with because of all the health changes.

Mental health is sometimes just absolutely debilitating and far too overwhelming!!

#MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #Selfcare #Toxic #Abuse #youmatter #beyou #loveyourself #Bekind #Insomnia #SkinCancer #narcissist #AloneTogether #Endometriosis #Upallnight #CheckInWithMe #HeyEmma #longcovid #Insecure #COVID19

Well for the first time in absolutely ages and I mean ages , I agreed to meet up with the girls in town .I actually felt excited I got all ready like full ready ,changed my outfit about 4 times done my hair ,face everything !!I am now currently back in bed with my pj's on watching Netflix!!
My health's got so bad and some of the effects physically I just hate .Weight loss, severe hair loss,fatigue, my constant sickness and especially my confidence .I used to be happy with myself and how I felt and looked.i was content .I didn't really bother about anything.Itd not even about anyone else's opinions it's about how I feel when I look at myself ,all the changes that I notice.My scars that can now be seen ,especiallythe large one on side of my face I can no longer hide with my hair down due to how sever the hair loss has been can't even put it down properly anymore and that was like my comfort blanket in ways .I just absolutely have lost myself altogether. My crippling anxiety has been very bad the past week anyways so that's definitely not helping , but I was handling that and got ready and felt good until I stood and looked at myself 😭😭😭😭😭.

Hope everyone is having a safe, happy day 😊

#MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #Selfcare #Toxic #Abuse #youmatter #beyou #loveyourself #Bekind #Insomnia #SkinCancer #narcissist #AloneTogether #Endometriosis #Upallnight #CheckInWithMe #HeyEmma #longcovid #Insecure #COVID19 #lost #overwhelmed

How has your week been ??
Has there been anything you're struggling with particularly this week ??
Has something made you smile this week ??

#MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #Selfcare #CheckInWithMe #HeyEmma #loveyourself #Bekind #Insomnia #SkinCancer #narcissist #AloneTogether #Endometriosis #Upallnight #COVID19 #PTSD

Advice Addict ♥️

Hey everyone I had made a new group,
Would love for anyone to join if they would like.
I have a few groups with lots of members and I'm hoping can get this group to be another safe place for us all ♥️

It's more of an "Agony aunt" sort of group.

It's for anything at all , any questions or situations we can look for support or advice for or even just share our daily struggles,funny encounters ,relationship issues or parenting journeys even just our daily life's.

#MentalHealth #CheckInWithMe #HeyEmma #Anxiety #Selfcare #Toxic #Abuse #youmatter #beyou #loveyourself #Bekind #Insomnia #SkinCancer #narcissist #AloneTogether #Endometriosis #Upallnight #longcovid #COVID19 #Depression #PTSD #

Hey Mighties.....

Advice Addict ♥️

I've made a new group and I'm hoping it can be a support for anyone needing it and also for a space for my own rants and issues and to get support I know I sure as hell could do with it at times and I'm always encouraged and feel grateful from the support and people who I've ever connected with on this app.

It's a space for anything from family issues , parenting, funny situations, daily issues,health journeys,or just q space for anyone feeling alone or needing to talk anything at all 😊

Hopefully it can be a good thing for someone ♥️

#MentalHealth #Anxiety #PTSD #HeyEmma #Depression #Selfcare #Toxic #Abuse #youmatter #beyou #loveyourself #Bekind #Insomnia #SkinCancer #narcissist #AloneTogether #Endometriosis #Upallnight #CheckInWithMe #WritingThroughIt #Selftalk #loveyourself #GeneralParenting #Parenting

Hey Mighties .....

How are you today ?? How has your week been ?

#MentalHealth #HeyEmma #Depression #Selfcare #Anxiety #CheckInWithMe