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Facing the week ahead

I have sooo much to do today and tomorrow. And Thursday.
"Normal" people wouldn't consider it much.
But it is for me!
I feel very overwhelmed.
But all the stuff is important.
Some of it is for the kids.
And that's always non-negotiable.
I don't want my kids to suffer because their mom has multiple mental issues.
So I somehow managed to get it done.
A motto of mine.
But it has a cost.
I am going to spend the other days of the week recovering.
Sometimes I feel like that's not much of a life to have.
But I know I am still better off than so many others.
And it's my life, I am going to make the best of it.
And be as content with it as I can.
Starting with practicing gratitude, my self praise and accomplishment lists, and self care.

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I wasnt made for winter, i want my flip flops. ha

I Don't like #Winter time. It's such a long and depressing time. I can't stand the cold and snow. I just feel so down and blue. Sure #snow looks pretty. I just can't stand this season.. I really struggle with this time of the year; ¨)*

¸.•*¸.• ✿´¨).• ✿¨)

(¸.•´*(¸.•´*(.¸. •*Good Night

Sweet Dreams 💙✨💙✨💙

#TheMighty #MightyTogether #Depression #anxiet

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I'M feeling a little down today #sad #anxiet #Depression

Why don't people let ya know they aren't coming? You waste time waiting around. Gosh.. I was suppose to go to a gender reveal party for the group home where my day progrham is for one of the workers. (well in place today cuz they were training new workers today). I waited a hour. no one showed up.Oh well it's not a big deal. Something may of happened. #TheMighty #MightyTogether


My Experience #CPTSD #anxiet y #Depression #Asthma #GravesDisease #graves eye disease #hyperthyroid #Childhood abuse survivor

I was raised by a narcissistic mother who was physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive. She would draw me in with the love that I craved and then cut me into pieces. She made me feel as though I could not live without her. This went on most of my life and I cannot for the life of me understand why I let it carry on as I did. The hardest part to me was when I told my aunts and uncles, her sisters and brothers, how she was and what she did to me, no one did a thing. It was the 60’s and 70’s but geeze!

i am now 60 years old and have been estranged from her for several years. I have a wonderful God, husband, family and friends which make my life full. Obviously my life is much better however I still deal daily with the maladies caused by the fallout. It is a fight not to blame and carry anger and hate however The Lord has shown me a better way that doesn’t eat me up with negative emotions though they obviously still come through at times and life isn’t perfect.

it is good to find a place where I can let my hair down with people who understand exactly what it is like. It’s wonderful to not feel alone but be understood.


visible swollen lymph node in just one armpit?

Has anyone else experienced a visibly swollen lymph node in the armpit that happened overnight? what was the cause?#ChronicIllness #anxiet

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#PTSD #Bipolar2Disorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #anxiet

Struggling with loss

Following up on the last post because I accidentally hit the post button on my phone......
The jist of what I'm saying is it seems like people who have money to spare automatically assume those who don't can't be innocent and care deeply for someone and help that person because they love them like family with no strings......Grandma Rachel and I helped each other. She was there for me in ways that no one else was or could have been. She never judged me for my mental issues. Never. She was always supportive of me regardless of what I was going through mentally. Even though she didn't understand it, she never judged me once. She just offered me unconditional love and support. In my world that was extremely rare!!! It still is.

I find it hard to breathe. I find myself lost. I was limited on communication with her like everyone else was because of who she was staying with....I felt like she should have had a landline put in her room so she could have people from here call her and she could feel free to call them. The man and his wife who took her in for the last year when I could no longer live with her due to having to be my mother's caregiver after her heart attack was her long time adopted son like I was her long time adopted Granddaughter only he was that to her since he was a child. I was her adopted Granddaughter only since 1998.

I got to talk to her at best twice a week for ten minute at the most, many times less than that because she had to talk on this man's personal cell phone. Money was no object for the man and his wife apparently. I'd heard this for a long time, not that it made any difference to me, except if this was the case unless he was deliberately controlling her conversations why not allow her the freedom of having her own landline in her own room?????? She could hear much better on a landline and he knew this. He was only willing to get her a cell phone which she hated and didn't want because it was hard for her to hold and to hear on. I just am having a hard time coming to terms with the loss of her and the loss of the last year I feel like he robbed me of with I being unreasonable feeling this way???

I don't want to be stuck on things that are already done and in the past that can't be changed. I know that's not healthy and doesn't do any good. I think maybe I'm struggling with this right now because this loss is so fresh. Any thoughts on how to better cope with this would be appreciated.

Thanks for being a kind group of people who care about each other 🙏💕💕💕


Mom-work-mental health balance #PTSD #anxiet ##BipolarDisorder

My almost 3 year old son has a little bug that he got from daycare and has been out sick. My boss is not understanding at all that I had to call out of my 5 hour shift at the pharmacy (I never call out) and was unable to find coverage. I know it's getting busier at work and they rely on us but there is only so much I can do if my son is sick and can't go to daycare. I already struggle to pay my bills and I dont want to be worried about losing my job because I'm being a good mom.
Side note: when covid started I was working 60+ hour weeks because everyone else was sick and I knew we needed the coverage. Idk if I'm being over sensitive or what I'm hurt that she seems to not care about anything but herself and the job. #workingmoms #Anxiety #MentalHealth #BipolarDepression
How do you all balance work, parenting and your mental health?

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I am so lost. #Depression #PTSD #CPTSD #anxiet

I am so lost. I suffer from ptsd and cptsd and all I can think of is how wrong I feel and I can not get past it. I took a few too many pills hoping that would help. All it has done is made me feel off. I feel like I am worthless and hopeless and I have no one. I mean I do but it feels like I don’t. I feel like I am n a nightmare and my world is crumbling and I do not know how to get it back on track. I can not deal with this darkness. This pain I side me that makes me want to disappear. A part of me wants to fight but the stronger part doesn’t see the point. I know this will pass. But while I am experiencing it I feel so lost and alone.