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Death of a parent and BPD

just wondering if anyone else has gone through this. My mother unexpectedly passed away and I unfortunately found her. I'm not even sure how I've been able to stay as calm as I have & handle this time. #Loss #Death #mom #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #howdoyoucope

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#chronic Pain #Fibromyalgia #chronic fatigue # Guilt #mom of kids with ADHD, Bipolar, on the Spectrum # wife of a hoarder #sjogrens disease

Hi it’s so great to find a community. I’ve been through a lot. I’m reading these posts from Mom’s of little ones. Hang in there! You’re doing fine. I had 3, worked full time as a Registered Nurse &was always struggling to juggle career and home life. I felt guilty for leaving my kids , felt like I didn’t have the energy for both. I had no idea at the time that I had Sjögren’s disease and fibromyalgia. I was always so exhausted during the whole bedtime routine - bath, books etc which we all loved but I secretly just wanted to get out of the way so that I could flop into bed.
My kids are grown now . 31, 24, & 22. I miss those times so much. I cherished each moment with them when they were little and played with them a lot , but they do grow up so quickly. My husband & I are divorced. We got divorced when they were teens. I don’t see the boys as much . I still feel guilty, but just have to remember that Im doing the best I can. I love them more than life and they love me too.

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Good days

Today was a good day. Still experiencing weird, hard to explain pain. I managed to try and push through it. I made our bed. Did the dishes, finished my daughter’s enrollment for Pre k4. Handled some issues with debt by correcting insurance information. Got half of our dinner started and my husband will finish the other half. Finally laying down on the couch and resting. Appreciate the good days! You’re more than your symptoms. You got this. ❤️🤘🏻 #GravesDisease #hashimotos #Neuropathy #Silentmigraines #ChronicMigraineSyndrome #Fatigue #mom

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Down Dog & Pass it On: Parental Benefits to Baby & Me Yoga

During your baby's first years, they will grow trillions of brain-cell connections, called neural synapses. Brain development can continue until age 25, but babies have the most development up to age 9.

The importance of synapses can not be understated & is a ‘use it or lose it’ function. In fact, toddlers have more synapses than an adult! These synapses grow as early as the first couple weeks in utero.

How babies develop has many layers, but studies show interactive activities are a core component. Parents have many activities to pick from: social, artistic, and a popular choice is Baby + Me Yoga classes. Enhancing a baby’s brain power can be found in many components of a baby-specific class and into toddler or, ‘Tot and me’, classes that are offered.

The most important element of Baby + Me is the parent. Not only are the skills below crucial to childhood development, stress management skills for adults are included as part of a specialized Baby + Me class, and taught from a therapeutic lense. Long-term emotional skills are learned from daily interactions with the parent. Coming to a class is a learning experience for both adult and baby, enabling a parent with tools to use for years to come.

Tailored yoga for your baby or toddler includes the following key ingredients to a healthy baby prime for physical, emotional, and mental development long term. If yoga isn’t for your family, you’ll want to look for these these categories.

Classes that include:

- Emotional resiliency / naming emotions enables less stress growing into the teen years.
- Interactive play shows a child how they can interact with the world, developing social skills.
- Baby massage not only reduces stress and improves sleep, it increases brain size compared to babies who aren’t touched as much.
- Use of funny talk, faces and gestures helps children talk & absorb language. Baby + Me classes add these elements along with nursery rhymes allowing for repetition of information, language, & connection with others.
- Responding to crying seems simple but a parent holding and cuddling, and your day-to-day engagement with your baby, signal emotional security to the brain. You’ll learn tactics to use in and out of the class.
- Being attentive and focused on your child for a period of time each day (throughout the day) builds long-term trust for your baby. Participating in a Baby + Me class allows for that uninterrupted time & short exercises you can do at home.
- Express joy and interest in your baby. Let your body language, your shining eyes, your attentiveness to babbling and baby activities, and your gentle caresses and smiles, validate the deeply lovable nature of your little one.

To learn more about specialized Baby + Me Yoga, or how the parent can improve their own stress & emotional skills for the child’s long term success, you can go to wellandzenyoga . com.

#neuroscience #postpartum #PostpartumAnxiety #mom #MightyMoms #Pregnancy #Stress



My mom pasted away this past Tuesday. Her funeral is this coming Tuesday. She got what she thought was allergies on May 5th and then went down hill from there. It took my siblings and I a month to convince her to go to the doctor because she wasn't getting better. We found out at the very end, she had stage four cancer. How did she not know? How were there no signs or symptoms? I'm having anxiety about going to her funeral because my younger brother is one of those controlling toxic people. I had to block him on my phone because his text messages are abusive and all over the place. I come from an abusive family and I think that is one of the reasons I have pushed them away. I'm positive my brother is going to say stuff to me when I go to mom's funeral. I'm not sure how to handle him. He pushes and pushes until I can't take it anymore. He brings up things he knows will hurt me on purpose. My sister says that's between you and him. Then sa

He says y'all have never gotten along. But she doesn't get it because he doesn't talk to her like he does me. I'm so anxious I can hardly eat. #mom #Anxiety #Abusive #Toxic #nauseous #Funeral #cancerous

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A New Reality in Mom Stress

The postpartum period after delivering a baby is a little over a year, yet we are told often we are supposed to ‘bouncing back’ to normal after 3 months.

The old ways of viewing postpartum causes stress to new moms, with 15% - 20% experiencing debilitating symptoms.

Postpartum stress syndrome is a step below postpartum depression and postpartum anxiety in terms of severity.

“While postpartum stress syndrome can create feelings of anxiety that are unsettling, these feelings do not impede her ability to function or get through the day,”

Yet, the rise of postpartum stress and depression is on the rise, especially since the beginning of the pandemic in 2020.

What is going on, and what can we do about it ?

First, we were doing too much before the pandemic, at least many were. Mothers and caregivers especially felt the stress post COVID 19 with working jobs and then managing childcare or school in the home.

Second, we are adding to the increasing challenges by maintaining the old ways of life and trying to ‘return to normal.” Except, our world isn’t like it was. Women are expected to work as though they don’t have kids, raise children as if they don’t work, and live in a way that resembles a child-free life.

Instead I ask you to honor where you are in your life, especially if you have younger kids under the age of 5. Cut yourself a lot of slack and know this reality isn’t forever.

If you want to “challenge” yourself, ask yourself how you can enjoy moments to yourself, manage your stress, and be present with what is. There are many techniques to help you in 10 minutes or less.

The more we all push back as moms and caretakers, the sooner we can all move towards a new way of being; one where we feel more balanced and not torn in multiple directions.

#postpartum #PostpartumAnxiety #newmom #AutoimmuneDisease #LymeDisease #Stress #Anxiety #PostpartumDepression #mom #MomGuilt #AdrenalFatigue #AddisonsDisease #Pregnancy


Still on a journey #selfcare #MentalHealth #Bipolar #mom

When I first found myself struggling with my moods I was flip flopping a lot and I got given a diagnosis at 16. Didn't know what to really do with the term bipolar disorder. I just partied on in my late teens and kept wondering why I was such a mess all the time. Wasn't till I was maybe 19 that I started seeking out more help and someone to chat to about what I was dealing with. I didn't get a lot of good advice right away. But I did learn about what I was dealing with both from my dr and myself researching it. Honestly if I had gotten advice right out the gate I'm not sure how I would have responded to the information..or reacted to it. I sure know how I reacted to the news, I felt frustrated and soon found out there wasn't a magic one pill to help make it all better. It's taken me years to maintain a balance in my brain where I could at least feel level. That came with finding a medication combo that was beneficial for me. Before that time trying medications made me feel like a lab rat with trial and error on meds. It was very frustrating and a defeating process at times. I soon realized that this was a journey and not a one stop and go bandage. There have been and always will be good days and bad days. Living with bipolar is no easy deal.
At first I had no tools to manage it. My first was medication and with that came side effects and that was a whole new territory. I had my family Dr, a psychiatrist and a counselor which I accessed through our community. For those who think it's expensive for counseling it is, which is why I looked for help in my community. I've done one on one therapy and I had an addictions counselor to discuss my love for alcohol and marijuana. It took time for me to realize how those two things in the way I was using them weren't serving me well. That was how I coped with my diagnosis at that time but that's a whole other story. When I found group therapy in my 20's that really pushed me to my boundaries. I gained a lot of tools from seeking out mental health care through group therapy. It also challenged my anxiety of people because it was in a group setting. Very beneficial for me in the long run. I didn't always view it as such at the time though, even skipped sessions on occasion. I am always learning and reflecting on life it's part of the healing process. Group helped me learn about myself. Helped me learn to be more self aware. I learned about mindfulness and the tools you can use from tuning into yourself. Asking yourself why and getting curious when your triggered instead of just reacting to a situation eventually you can pause and respond to it. But you know I really wish someone had told me how hard it can feel some days, to get 'er done with a mental health journey always ahead of you.
Like this mode of life is very much my life. It gets tiring, it gets old at times. To help fight that fight I have with myself even after year's of therapy and management with my drs, I've learned for me that self-care is so important. When you are feeling off and your day is looming before you, or your simply stuck in a funk. Do take your medications, feed yourself, and fuel your self with good things. Basic care of your needs is your starting point. Brush your teeth, shower, eat, wash your face. See how you feel, reach farther, go for a walk. Clean up your home if that makes you feel better and accomplished even a little. Being productive helps me when I'm in a state of being stuck in the mud.. not going anywhere fast and am sinking slowly. Some days I need to be creative like writing, drawing or painting. Or I'm singing and dancing with my daughter. Those things are good for her and I. Self care has taken on a different look for me as a mom. It's a bit harder to have "good" energy left for me like when she is down for a nap. Now I say good energy cause I give my daughter and husband my good energy first. I soon realized I needed some "good" energy for me too though and have been working on a balance of things for my family and I. So some days I nap too. That is also meeting a need of mine if I'm tired it's okay to sleep. It's okay to rest instead of doing the dishes. Dishes aren't going anywhere, time is. If I choose to sleep it's cause I need it and I still have to tell myself that it's okay to take a break from chores and errands. If I have the energy I'll focus on the self care in her down time and when we are together I'm doing all I can for her, then me 2nd. I know I need to take care of my daughter but I also know with my mental health it's so important to match those needs for me too. Can't live off coffee all day though some days I try to, till I remind myself I need to eat too . I'm in my 30's and I've been on a mental health journey for 13 years. I was at my worst point in my early 19-20 days. Now I'm a first time mom, I struggle with depression, anxiety and bipolar disorder. I take medication to combat the brain/chemical part. But I very much know the rest is on me, and I feel like I give decent advice to those I care for when they feel down and out. It sure helps to take your own advice on your bad days.
Being aware of your self enough to implement changes to make yourself feel better. The whole day doesn't need to be that bad try and fill your cup, don't just keep draining it. Be your own friend and take care of you. Some times it's harder to do, but routine helps. Helps me to be consistent and show up for myself. Definitely a journey and with a little one in tow and having a healthy happy baby and I'm happy too I sure feel grateful for the tools I've learned and am able to use on the daily. I strive to be my best self each day because that's what I and my family deserve. It's not always easy and some days I have to force myself into care for myself but I try not to feel guilty if it takes me a little extra time to figure things out. I'll get there, I've come this far I tell myself. I can do this.


A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes

Hello my friends. Yes... It is me again.

Today i had quit my job that I was hired at about a week ago. I barely could make it through my day yesterday evening. It was quite awful because of the fact that I had stayed late, and did not get to go to sleep until closer to midnight. I struggled because I had to take #Medicine for my #Insomnia . I know how much I have been struggling for years with this disorder. The job started out kind of fun, but was lacking proper training. I realized that most employees were new, and kind of just thrown into the mix of store operations. One of the managers had a #personality clash with me. She came off very harsh, and snippy which made me so #nervous . I was #Crying about it, and could not seem to get myself out of that #worry .

I read somewhere that those who have #BipolarDisorder also have a connection with #Insomnia . Some may have reason to believe that it has to deal with a wandering mind due to a hypomanic episode. Yet, I think they fail to understand that it is not always the reason why.

I have a serious case of #DeathAnxiety that does not seem to go away. It has gotten better since my father had passed away, as I feel a little more comfortable with the facts that this happens to us all. However, I am still struggling. Each day that passes is another day completed of my life and I do not know when God will call me home. There is this weird feeling that I get in my chest that creates this #Weird thought process. I feel this hallowed out sensation in my chest, and I also experience a feeling like I need to whine or cry or yell "I do not want to die." Sometimes I call out for my #Dad who is no longer with me. Therefore, I noiced I have reached out to my #mom a whole lot. I #cherish the time that I have to live.

If you have made it this far through this message, I thank you.
I really would love a #reply .

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Will someone please share your thoughts?

My Mom recently died, on February 16th. We were close. With Mother’s Day only a few days away, I’m missing her.

Have any of you lost a mother you were close to?
Would you please share some of your thoughts?
Did you find any “strategies” or ways of looking at life that helped you grieve on that first Mother’s Day without her? Thanks! 🥹