healingisnotlinear

With the hope of helping others, CaringBridge users have been sharing for years their paths toward healing. CaringBridge invites you to read the stories of ordinary people plunged into serious health crises talk about what has made them whole again. bit.ly/3hAwQak #Healing #HealingVoices #healingisnotlinear #Caregiving

I just spent over an hour crying over my situation. I have so much internal conflict about it. Some part of me feels bad for my abusers (because they were family) but another is angry and feels that they should be held accountable.

I’ve cried over what I had and what I’ve wanted. I worry about what will happen to them later on in life. I’ve been told that they are still my family even though they abused me. I am not saying that I am justifying their behavior but some part of me mourns them.

There are days, weeks and months where I feel like I have it together and then, like tonight, I fall apart. Healing is messy, but I have to admit that part of me feels better for letting that all out, all that hurt and toxicity. Hopefully I will have a better day, week and month than tonight. My healing journey is my own but sometimes I feel so lonely.

Have a goodnight fellow Mighties. Thanks for reading and responding.

#AbuseSurvivors #Healing #healingisnotlinear #Relationships

As an #Incestsurvior I tend to beat myself up over everything little thing. I tear myself down, rather than build myself up. I have a very negative internal dialogue, which I assume stems from years of abuse. I have a lot of self hate and blame regarding what I’ve been through.

Recently however, I’ve started to look at things from a different perspective. I’ve reminded myself of that facts of the situation (such as I was a child when the abuse began and my parents were supposed to protect me). I’ve been reading about the effects of trauma and about others experiences with trauma. It makes me feel less alone and more validated.

I’ve been coming to the realization that I need to show myself some grace and compassion. For example, when I get triggered or overly emotional to NOT beat myself up and realize that it stems from the trauma. I’ve made a decision to see myself as a survivor and not a victim. I’m determined to work on more self love and care, giving myself the things that I did not receive before.

I often bulk at kindness or compliments because I have this strong distrust that it’s either fake or they want something from me. I am determined to work on this also. To any trauma survivor that needs to hear this: You need to snow yourself compassion and grace. You are working towards healing. It is not pretty, but it is possible. Utilize your resources. Reach out if you need to.

Don’t further traumatize or disrespect yourself by not practicing self care. I hear you and I am rooting for you. What you have been through does not dictate who you are or what you are capable of. Though it gets hard, keep fighting. You are worth it. Life is worth living.

Breathe and love yourself ❤️
#truamasurvivor #SexualAbuse #Selflove #healingisnotlinear #MightyTogether #PTSD #BipolarDisorder #CheckInWithMe #ChildAbuse #Grace

It’s okay to not be okay. Healing is anything but linear, with a lot of ups and downs. I try to not be so hard on myself when I do slip up. I’m learning to accept myself even on my bad days. On days where I don’t see the point and don’t want to get out of bed. I feel like I’m moving in the right direction but sometimes I feel stalled from all the complex emotions. Managing #PTSD and #BipolarDisorder is enough work. I’m still working to establish a routine. But I just have to remind myself that it’s okay to not be okay. Does anyone agree? What has your healing journey taught you? #TraumaSurvivors #SexualAbuse #Narcissiticabuse #healingisnotlinear

Hey Mighties! Thanks to all that comment/read my post, I very much appreciate it. After recently cutting my mother out of my life, I’ve been experiencing some difficult emotions. Being so emotional is mentally and physically wearing me out. I grieved the “loss” of my father and now I am experiencing the same thing with my mother.
I am trying every day to heal and see the positive in my situation. I have a loving boyfriend, a few great friends, a steady job, a roof over my head, I am working towards a masters degree, and I have a great therapist. However, I am searching for the positive even in the darkest places. When I am overcome with the desire to lash out or harm myself, I try to remind myself of all the good things I have going for me.
But this is easier said than done. I am also trying to forgive my parents and accept them as they are but that too is difficult. How can you see the positive when all you see is negativity? What are the positives in your life? How do you count your blessings? We are in this together. #healingisnotlinear #Positivity #Trauma

Society tells us that we need to respect and honor our parents, but what do you do when that parent is toxic or abusive? Recently, I’ve had to go no contact with my mother because she was not respecting my boundaries and need for validation. Though I feel some level of guilt, I also cannot be around someone that hurts me by victim blaming and tries to manipulate me into doing what she wants.
I’ve put more effort into healing and working on myself. Though it hurts that my mother chooses to not support me I have to do what is best for myself. I cannot heal from my trauma if I put myself in situations in which I am still being hurt. I am very appreciative of my mother but I need to stick to my truth and rely on myself. Slowly, I am gaining a family that is outside of my own. It saddens me to realize that I have two abusive parents but I know that cutting them off is for the best. Healing is not beautiful but is worth it in the end. #SexualAbuse #toxicmothers #healingisnotlinear #PTSD #Bipolar

So I’m working on being more comfortable being myself now that I moved home. I’ve heard that my family members thinks that being off at school has changed me... little do they know this is the person who I wanted to be all along. I spent so much time trying to be the person they wanted me to be for far too long. Now they treat me like a stranger. I am still me just me being who I want to be. Being back in a toxic environment makes it hard for me to heal from it bc it’s always something that comes back to remind me I’m still hurting. It’s a struggle and I’m constantly trying to escape. I don’t want to just escape. I just want to move on. #Depression #healingisnotlinear #toxicparents #FamilyDoesntGetIt