Memories

He pretended to be clueless and confused today, https://again.I was already in a panic state to him coming home.it is https://bad.I have confirmation now, that his friend decided to hack everything and this has, been happening for over a https://year.I am livid..I have proof now and I feel like it is 100times more sick,than I https://imagined.I find out about the house https://soon.The chance of them letting it go are https://slim.I warned him and he became angry,asked too many specific questions when I https://flipped.Each time, I caught https://it.Within two hours both me and my sons phones were acting https://up.Then another txt acting and attacking https://me.These people have no idea how hard I will fight for what is https://mine.I spent years,never having anything scheduled, no celebrations,no family traditions,no safety for my https://son.Absolutely no protection,at https://all.He wanted me to stray,pushed me, made plans, arrangements and then became my enemy,when I told him I always,chose https://him.Saddest story of a marriage I've ever https://heard.He had the man have his friends hit on me,say things as I walked by,follow me,endlessly.He has full links to my https://family.His own mother told me to take the money and https://run.She told me the truth last year, moved away and now states she never told me that.it is munipulation and lack of courage from my https://husband.He did the same thing to me twenty four years https://ago.I can't believe I took him back, let him raise my son, put me last for sixteen years, and I let https://him.He know said he never loved me.
His male friends and their wives,can, have https://him.He is going to play IT his way, as he always https://has.He wasted my time and spirit,instead of being https://honest.I will never forgive these https://people.And I will fight,just as I always https://have.I built this house with https://him.I sweat,bled for nothing but a ceiling over my head,which he feels is enough for https://us.A unfinished house that triggers his family, so much that they leave...They told https://him.They told him and he'd promised but he can only still give the minimum and make sure his reputation https://stands.He didnt care and noone can ever know the https://truth.His pride,bigger than his empathy or https://family.He truly does not https://care.He was told how to hurt me and two years I have taken it. BUT,now I'm out,completely.Everything he has done has been https://exposed.From spending,gambling,lying,avoiding family and the sabotaging munipulation is the saddest display I have ever https://saw.He believed if I have the capacity in one area Im faking my TBI,and AVM https://issues.His peers are ignorant,loyal to a fault, to my diagnosis and where I am in therapy.my sessions were listened to through zoom.it is unrepairable and grounds for divorce times ten!He has no clue what he has https://done.He was not allowed to touch the settlement and he https://did.He knew what he was doing prior to a separation. He wanted separate, he knew you cannot sell your house with a dependant on disability,without informing them,ecspecially when one is seeking a https://seperation.He knew about the studio and slipped,everything has been orchestrated in my https://life.He has changed the narrative to imply a dissociative mental state every two weeks,to me, as if I don't live it every second of every https://day.How can a person do this to someone?And expect them to walk away without their tail between their legs?

It was years ago when I broke up with a person, with whom I had been strongly attached, that I was thrown into a state of deep depression. To this day, I remember the depression and feelings of worthlessness after this person left my life. For the longest time, I kept running my life with the belief they would come back until ultimately my life changed.

One of the hardest parts of the process of letting go was learning not to compare myself with the person who left. It took strength and time to learn not to look for them and to change my focus on someone or something else.

After about three years, with support from others, my life changed and this person became just a memory. If I had compared myself to how this person was doing through those three years, I would have never made it through the difficult process of letting go and finding my new self.

There is a lot of strength in letting go, but there is even more strength in learning not to compare. Change, that is, true change, almost always happens inwardly and over a long time.

A friend of mine used a great analogy that I would like to share. At one point in your life, you may have been the water in the glass that was full, but once you were placed in a bigger glass and no longer filled it to the top, you became disheartened. Nothing truly happened to you, but the cup became bigger so you have more ways and room to grow.

It is important not to become disheartened in times of growth because God uses those times to groom, shape, mold, reveal, heal, and enlighten you. Be thankful that you now have a bigger glass to fill, and be thankful that you don’t have to compare your glass to the glass that is next to you #growth #Relationships #Memories

This is my first Christmas without my Mom. I miss her so much; but my mind is free to remember all the happiness and fun she and my Dad gave our whole family at Christmastime.

I’m so lucky to have good memories!
#Christmas #Memories #Parents

Things could have turned out completely differently and this makes me so dizzy.

So many stuff my mind's showing me at the moment.

I am here by chance.

I did nothing to come here; just went with the flow; I built nothing to come where I am now.

If it wasn't for all the people I would have been still eleven.

I feel like my youth years just went without me really living them. Now I should be an adult, but I haven't lived what was supposed to come before (or - I lived it while being tossed around).

There's so many stuff I can't do now.

I just wish I had more friends and more stability.

I really wish I had the time between one people and the other to take a break and find my balance and myself within all the confusion.

I am consistenceless; I'm based on void.

[makes me a bit scared]

Wondering what I'm doing next. Let's see.

🌚

#Photography #landscape #Autumn #Memories #past #Present #future #Life

Does anyone else, who finds it difficult to make memories 'the traditional way' with their children (eg too unwell to run around with, go on holidays or go on days out) find it really upsetting to watch them grow up?
when you haven't been able to make the same memories as everybody else?

Or feel like you have been robbed of being a traditional parent, and being able to enjoy their preschool years at home together, because as you were too ill to fully embrace this special time?

My youngest has just started school properly after reception (kindergarten) and the past 3 years I've not been able to make memories with him in the way that I did with my elder son (12) before i fell ill 3 years ago.

He was my little man and we did everything together.

Now I realise 3 years has been lost and wasted to bedbound illness and suddenly my baby is no longer a baby like before, he is almost 6. Though we cuddle and play quietly often, I feel heartbroken and sad ill never be able to 'redo' those special times.

Can anyone relate? As im struggling to move on from this

Any advice very much appreciated, love Grace

#Children #Family #Love #Memories #sad #mummy #ChronicIllness #CFS #ME #UCTD #longcovid #Parents