I think I have to give up my cats. I can't afford to feed them regularly, and they're getting thin, especially one in particular. My boyfriend quit helping when he lost the house. I'm going to start looking for rescues tomorrow, although my cats are mostly older and not likely to be adopted. I keep crying. I love them so much, and they love me.
This is part of a message I sent to someone, in regards to when I went to feed them yesterday. I have former neighbors who watch me when I go there:
I was worried at first, because one of my cats wasn't showing up. I put some food and water down, and just as I started to leave, two of my cats showed up (but not the one I was expecting). I put out more food. While I was there, people were watching. I saw the people across the street, especially. At one point, a car drove up, put her emergency lights on, and went to the door of the house where they were watching me. The guy let her in, and a few minutes later, she came back out, got in her car, and left... Sort of. She drove a short distance to the corner (my boyfriend's former house is the last one on the street), then she got out of her car, leaving it on. It looked like she went around her car, but I didn't get a good look. I was keeping an eye on my cats, making sure they were eating. Eventually, she left. Other cars drove by while I was there.
When I left, I found the cat I was looking for, but I also saw a bunch of kids just standing in their driveway (I doubt they all lived there), watching me. I drove back to the house, with about three cats following me, including the one I was looking for. I put down more food and petted her. Eventually, I left, and the kids were playing basketball. They stopped while I passed by. This was around midnight, I guess. I went to the other cats, fed them and gave them water, and eventually left for the night.
Now, my boyfriend is asking me to stay in today to save him money so he can give me money Thursday (housekeeping day) to go out. I felt so much better getting out today, except for the people harassing me. I got up a bit late, too.