movingout

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    Community Voices

    Changes

    I'm super scared. I really am looking forward to all of these things, but I feel so anxious.
    I'm basically going to move out (student dormitory, only at home on holidays) and I'm going to visit a new school (that's the reason I'm moving). That means:
    -I will have more dance classes with completly new dance teachers in new studios with new dance classmates
    -new schoolbuilding&rooms
    -new teachers
    -new classmates
    -new living place
    -new living area
    -new town
    -new people everywhere
    -new town
    -new responsibilities, like beeing completly alone responsible for cleaning, feeding myself, doing the groceries, financial organisation, ...
    -working for my mental wellbeing (starting therapy for the first time)
    And I don't like changes. Some people maybe wouldn't believe this because I'm very flexible. But I'm still really not into the idea of changes (this confuses myself).
    Some of those changes are great, for example it means a way less stimulating environment (small town instead of a big city). But it still means new enviroment. I'm also super scared of failing. I could just... not living up to the expectations of
    ... somebody, I guess? I don't even know, I mean, they could be just my own expectations but I don't think that I have high expectations onto myself. Or do I?
    Ahhhh
    #expectations #movingout #changes #anxious #SelfDoubt #overwhelmed

    Community Voices

    Advice?

    Hello everyone. For those of you who know me know about my dysfunctional family. I'm planning on moving out soon and need some pointers and advice on how to make packing up my stuff and taking it out of the house go smoothly. Im thinking I need law enforcement due to the violence from the past. I honestly want to feel safe while removing my belongings and making sure nothing is broken or taken and that I'm not hurt. Idk how to talk to my family since they just choose to hear but not actually understand me. #Advice #movingout #Familydrama #thinkingofmymentalandphysicalhealth #Anxiety #Stress #SituationalDepression

    13 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    How does one with autism handle moving out?

    I'm moving out in July to live with my boyfriend. I'm completely terrified and excited to do so but I worry badly that I will get overwhelmed. My home with my family has been my safe place for so long and now it's time to make a new safe place with my boyfriend. I know I will finally get to be myself(FTM transgender) and live with my amazing boyfriend. I'm still so terrified. How will I be able to handle all of these emotions so I don't get overwhelmed or at least so it isn't as bad?
    #Autism #movingout #Ftm

    3 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Tips for moving out for the first time? What has helped you?

    So my dream is about to become true. I'm moving out on my own now at 25. I'm starting to feel pretty anxious about the whole thing. Not just because it's a big life change but also the how will I cope with everything then? Please let me know if you have any tips for moving out/on your own with ME and chronic pain. I already bought a robot vacuum since I have a dog that's shedding a surprising amount of hair considered she's smaller than the average newborn. Also I'm hoping to get in a dishwasher since it will save a bunch of energy. Please tell me your helpful moving and organising tips for managing a house for the first time. Also I'm thinking of buying a big freezer to freeze meals so I have healthy options on hand when I'm in a flare. All thoughts appreciated!
    #MyalgicEncephalomyelitis #movingout #ChronicPain #Tips

    11 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Moving forward feels a little backwards sometimes

    <p>Moving forward feels a little backwards sometimes</p>
    4 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    I need help from one of you super organized and “go do it” Supermoms, to make me get my shit done!! #Momspiration #Spiraling #Adhdinwomen #messedup


    Recently, I’ve been feeling like I’m spiraling downwards. I’ve been pushing off, important things I need to do, I’ve been making excuses for everything, and my mood is like a tornado, never to know where it will lead me. It’s been extremely stressful these last few months. I need to plan a wedding, in my home country of Germany, with my fiancé, that’s Italian-American with dual citizenship. And let me tell you, I’ve never hated German bureaucracy more in my goddamn fucking life. From horrible opening hours to, OHHH we’re not open on Mondays or weekends. I also should clean up my apartment, which by the way, I haven’t done in weeks. And then, there’s the big clock ticking over my head, that I need to empty out my home by mid April. So I’m running out of time, and my motivation is nowhere to be found. Giving up is not an option, I can’t let my fucked up head, and my unmotivated ass, get the best of me. I know I can do all of this, I did if before! I’ve packed up my whole life, and moved across the Atlantic before, so why shouldn’t I be able to do it now?! It’s just another move, just another episode of my head, not agreeing with my responsibilities, just another way, my ADHD is testing its limits. But I didn’t come this far, to just give in to it now. I’ve fought before and I’ll fight again this time.
    I know I’m not the only one here, to have these problems. Hell, all you moms out there are superheroes to me, with your organization, planning, and executing of all the things you have to manage daily. So can we make a deal for just right now, and you’ll be my mom for a second, and you tell me how to get my head out of my ass, and get my shit done! Pretty please with a cherry on top? #needhelp #Unmotivatedperfectionist #stressmanagement #Anxiety #movingout #Cleaninghouseissues

    1 person is talking about this
    Community Voices

    Any tips for moving out for the first time?

    My boyfriend and I have been together nearly three years and we are thinking about taking the next step and moving out.
    We both have stable jobs and are trying to prepare for what we would need to do. Anyone have tips of things to think about and watch out for? or even tips to make the whole process smoother? #Anxiety #helpneeded #help #movingout

    2 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Adulting is hard :)

    Cons of going away to uni: you have to do your own laundry
    Pros of going away to uni: you can just chuck all your clean socks and pyjamas in a drawer without pairing or folding them properly :)
    Got back yesterday to uni from going home for the week (loved not having to do dishes or think about food very much) so unpacking today... This just makes me smile.
    #ChronicPain #smile #ChronicIllness  #EhlersDanlosSyndrome  #movingout #wegotthis #uni

    5 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    I didn’t come this far to only go this far

    I have chronic pain, mild hypermobility that’s not clinical because I don’t bend in the “right” places but that’s still a pain in the ass and a couple other things that doctors are still scratching their heads at and coming up with names for that literally mean “oh yeah that’s been hurting for a while”. I didn’t make it all the way to conservatoire to only get to conservatoire. I’ve pushed through so many flares to get here (including one that meant I couldn’t play for a week before my audition for my first choice), I don’t know why I’m struggling so much now, but I honestly don’t know whether I am physically up for it and it makes me so sad. I worked my ass off to get here and the idea that I might even have to consider giving up… I’ve been in a flare pretty much since I got here. A consultant suggested (about a year ago) that I might have hEDS but that there’s no point pursuing diagnosis because it wouldn’t change the help I had. I really wish I had now. I’ve moved half way across the country and I can’t play and I haven’t finished setting up my support system because the GP lost my form and I haven’t had the motivation to follow up because I’ve been feeling so rubbish. What are they going to say that’s any different from the three years anyway? My back and shoulder hurt really bad, but I know the questions they’ll ask in A&E and going won’t be any help, and I don’t know about how to sort the physio. I’m scared there’s something actually physically wrong with me instead of just things that look like injuries but turn out to be just a flare. So yeah. Just hiding in my room to avoid my flatmates who don’t know anything about what’s going on with me (they are lovely people I just have no idea how to explain it to them or bring it up; I had to miss a rehearsal earlier this week and one of them asked why and when I said "long story, I had to go to the physio" and started to think about explaining he was like "it's ok, you don't have to explain", like thank you so much for just going with it and not wanting my entire life story of why I had to miss the rehearsal you lovely human being) and writing this in a vain attempt to make myself feel even a tiny bit better and distract myself from the fact I have a major competition audition in two days.
    #CheckInWithMe #Undiagnosed  #ChronicPain #Ihavenotgotthisatall  #movingout #ChronicIllness

    2 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Anger and Grief and Dealing with Pain

    So I posted for the first time yesterday and I’m just going to say, it is surprisingly therapeutic to write down and share my thoughts on pain. I know not everyone likes to read these sorts of posts (I definitely have periods where I absolutely hate anything and everything supposed to be motivational in anyway) but I thought I’d give it a go and see if it helped me deal with my pain and having just moved away for the first time. This is the third time I’ve tried to write this post. For some dumb reason I kept accidently clicking something that took me off the page so I wrote it in Word this morning instead.
    Like a lot of us on here, yesterday I saw the post that said “I sat with my anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief”. This got me thinking about some words of wisdom from a very good friend of mine a couple of months ago while I was in a rubbish place in the middle of, and mostly caused by, my exams (honestly I am so glad I don’t have to do written exams anymore, they are literally the only time I ever sit and type for that long in one go and it’s hell). He said that the best thing that I can do to keep moving forward with my viola playing is to accept that my pain is probably always going to be a part of me and that there’s going to be days when I can’t play and that beating myself up about it is not helpful. At this particular point to be honest, I was at the stage of “yeah sure”.
    Now thinking back on it, and on yesterday’s post, I guess there’s a lot of things we have to be angry about. Angry we can’t do everything we want to, that other people don’t seem to have a clue what we did just to get to the starting line this morning, that there doesn’t seem to be an answer for why we hurt (I personally have a lot of diagnoses which are basically doctor speak for *insert body part here* has been hurting for a while).
    Realistically I can see how this could be translated as grief - we are grieving for all the lost things we want to do and can’t. However, I also think that accepting the anger for what it is is ok too. Yes, I am angry that I can’t play that three hour quartet rehearsal without significant pain when the pain level was just about tolerable for the same thing four months ago. The problem is that getting angry causes tension, which makes pain worse for a lot of people, and crying generally gives you a headache (it’s still necessary sometimes, I know). So the question for is “what I am going to about it?”, but also “how can I deal with it on the days that I physically can’t?”

    She believed she could
    but she was in pain
    …so she did it a little differently and you know what?
    the world went on and it was okay.

    #ChronicIllness #ChronicPainn  #movingout   #movingforward   #Undiagnosed #wegotthis

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