physicalhealth

I honestly dont know how much more life can possibly throw at me. My fiancé broke up with me, ended the tenancy so I ended up with 1 month to find somewhere, now in temp accommodation so far away from my support network and familiarites, council are being useless, new local council will take 4 months to sort Custom Domain by Bitly support, so likely will end up without food or in debt, unable to afford things to allow me have somewhat of a "normal" life (disability needs). And my ex and my step son (which he's apparently not anymore, known from 2- now 9), are off on holiday to Greece today! One min my ex seems like he stills cares and was saying he still loves me, then the next is saying his son isn't my step son anymore and ignoring/ avoiding me...its just messing with my head. I know in someways the break up was needed as he's avoidant AS and I'm anxious (moving to avoidant) AS. He's not interested in putting in the work, and I just feel like im not good enough or worth it. He says he knows he needs MH support, but I don't feel he'll ever actually seek support. Ive been seeing stuff on instagram about how if work is done, we can both become secure together
It makes me want to hold our hope and hopefully we can try again but also I want to become a secure AS myself and i know realistically i cant do that while still waiting for him, my mind is just so mixed, as i want both....I struggle with small changes, so all these changes just has my head spinning. Even how im reacting to the break up is different (been in counselling for four years) and I'm so confused by my reaction. I feel like I should be sat in a corner crying, but I'm just plodding along each day and feeling like im Masking. But I don't know how much more energy I have before I do break down. And im scared that I will break, as i really dont want too. But its also so confusing that im not and if i dont. Not necessarily asking for advice... just needed to write it all out.

I have made several posts about the situation with my son so I won’t explain that again. On February 25th we go to court to remove him as my guardian. I have petitioned the court to let me be my own guardian again. Even with the complications from my current struggles with insomnia, I am capable of making sound decisions for myself. My morals and values are intact. I am very anxious to get this over with.

Speaking of the insomnia - I sleep less than 3 hours per 24. At least 2-3 nights a week I don’t even get into bed. I am following a healthy sleep guide that says bed only when sleepy. I started having bizarre episodes where my whole body jumps as if I was startled awake - but I was not sleeping in the first place. When I ran it by my PCP and now also my Psychiatrist, they both mentioned researching microsleeps. According to my research, they start when you are so sleep deprived that your organs are in danger of damage and/or failure. The human body needs to go into regular sleep cycles to rejuvenate all of the body systems regularly. I am going to be started on a new sleeping med called Belsomra when the prior authorization goes through.

I have also started to take some food extracts to assist meds I am already taking. Replace deficiencies revealed in blood work. And hopefully replace some prescription meds. I take 127 prescribed pills every day! The only thing both doctors asked is that #1 I only start 1 new extract a week. And #2 I notify each of them when I start something new so they can help track any side effects and/or benefits.

I have so many physical and mental health based dxs that I need to address. Doing it one at a time with single ingredient extracts when possible. With my autoimmune disorders, it can cause a different reaction or need a higher dose to accomplish anything. I am being careful and checking with my care team before I even purchase any extracts. The way I am doing this is very expensive. But how can I put a limit on my health and even my existence. I need to find some sort of quality of life- something I don’t think I have ever had. Anyway, this is the direction I have chosen at this time. I hope and pray for positive effects.

Those are the major updates I have to offer at this point in time… #Insomnia #MajorDepression #foodextracts #Court #microsleeps #Sleepmed #Guardianship #autoimmunedisorders #sounddecisions #organrisk #consultdoctor #Update #numerousdiagnoses #physicalhealth #MentalHealth #PTSDSupportAndRecovery #healthysleephygiene

Quotes that help you in everyday life or during a hard time. #Quotes #MentalHealth #physicalhealth #Support #quote #sayings #helpful #Selflove

Things have been changing so much. Everyday is so tiring. I've been making so much progress with my diagnosis journey yet everytime I have a small set back I doubt everything. Like what if I never have a positive test result you know. I just want this to end especially since others things in my life keep going sour.

Does anyone have any advice on how to manage my diagnosed depression during this journey for a diagnosis.
#MentalHealth #Depression #Diagnosis #physicalhealth

This Christmas was a little rough. Getting covid five days before Christmas ruined a lot of plans. Instead of baking cookies with the family or visiting my grandparents, I was stuck at home. It was rather lonely not being able to spend time with anyone which was what I was really looking forward to. So, here are a few things I did to keep the loneliness and bipolar depression away:

Sleep - I mean, come on, I had covid. Watch my favorite Christmas movies/shows/specials - There are many of these on the internet for free. Talk with friends and family - Just because I couldn't go out and see them doesn't mean I couldn't interact with them. Self-Care - Making sure I was taking my meds, eating right, and staying hydrated. Then, I also added a little something extra like doing my nails and cuddling with my pets. There's always something to do that can help with your physical and mental health. Hope these things help you like they helped me. Stay well this holiday season!

#COVID #MentalHealth #physicalhealth #Bipolar #Anxiety #BipolarDisorder #Depression #Grief #MightyTogether #CheckInWithMe