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I'm stuck

My mind has been so chaotic and I'm always confused. My College life is not supposed to be stressful, my course is animation and I love drawing and anything animation. I thought it would be fun but............. it's just.............. my delusions kept interfering and my voices too and in summary; its distorted reality.

My view of my classroom is that I really can't put it into words but it feels like I am in a different world. It's like so depressing, toxic air is around, I feel anxiety mixed with dread all around the class room's space. Then when I draw in our animation lab, I feel so depressed everytime I stroke a brush in Photoshop. I feel so weird.

The voices are so mean and manipulative. They said "You are a bad artist in the future", "Compare yourself with your other classmates, look at there drawings, yours is a piece of trash".

Then I can feel it inside me, I can feel it in my eyes, my drawings are so nasty. Then I have racing thoughts so negative, then I feel like I am mentally paralyzed for about seconds, then come back to my senses, then come back to stare at the computer losing my focus, while hundreds of thoughts flash before my eyes. I can feel despair all around me........................ How can I fight that? How can I..............

I have my medications but my medications only helped it to lessen the severity, my peak mental breakdown was 9 years ago, after a year of my peak mental psychosis, it becomes more bearable and less severe but the intensity is still on the same line. I have the skill to internalized my fight with the symptoms not to externally deal with it, I have bonus awareness against delusions but........... it is still not easy. Good thing I don't have paranoid delusions but my delusions blends with reality so well............... (I hear voices again right now)....

Should I just maybe let go...... for my college life? Maybe I'll just finish my comics first and drop out of college temporarily, so maybe I can have........... I don't know.......................

#Schizophrenia #MentalHealth

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My Mama\My Person Died

Hi all, thank you for welcoming to this group. My Mama was everything to me! She died on Friday May 19 @ 6:20 pm. She had a stroke in April & died from complications of that. Now, both of my parents are in heaven. My sweet Dad died very suddenly ( within 4 days) in June 2019.

I am, clearly, so relieved that my Mama is not suffering. Believe me, she suffered more than I was psychologically able to see at the time.

I miss her so much & sometimes I am fine and other days I can’t get out of bed.

I just turned 52 years young and I want to live a long and healthy life. Sometimes I just don’t even know where to begin.

Thank you for listening.


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I miss my FP :(

Today my FP left. I’m abroad, volunteering with kids. I arrived two weeks ago, the same day another volunteer arrived. We clicked instantly, and this being my first time travelling alone, I felt attached to him in a way I can’t explain. It wasn’t romantic, it was like he was my safe place. When he was around my mood was instantly lifted. When he smiled at me I immediately felt safe, I knew everything was okay. About a week ago I had a sever panic attack, he was there and supported me through it. I think that is where the attachment skyrocketed. After that I found myself always needing to know that he cared about me. I loved it when he asked if I was okay and when he gave me attention. He would stroke my cheek and smile and my heartbeat would just calm. And then today came, his last day. Honestly, up until this point I didn’t know he had become my favourite person. It wasn’t until we said goodbye and I saw him drive away that I felt the gut wrenching pain of realizing that he’s really gone, and I’ll probably never see him again. It’s been about 6 hours since we said goodbye and I’ve been going through it. I bawl for 30 minutes, write in my journal, feel better, think about him again and the cycle continues. I have been stable with my BPD for a while and that’s why this came as such a surprise. I didn’t even know he was my FP until he left, which made it hurt even more. I don’t know how to get over this. I don’t know how to be okay without him. I’ve known him for two weeks and I don’t know how to move on with the rest of my life now. I know at some point it won’t hurt so much, i just hope that point comes soon. #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

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What types of physical therapy have you tried?

There are so many different types of physical therapies depending on your symptoms and/or specific needs. What is right for you may not be right for someone else, and that's OK.

What types have you tried? Share using either the emojis below or with your own experience!

💖 Orthopedic physical therapy
🌸 Neurological physical therapy
🌻 Geriatric physical therapy
☀️ Pediatric physical therapy
✨ Sports physical therapy
💎 Cardiovascular and Pulmonary Rehabilitation
❤️ Woman's health physical therapy
🐞 Other specialized type (aquatic, vestibular rehabilitation, wound care etc.)
🦋 Unconventional types (dance/movement, functional electrical stimulation (FES), yoga etc.)

⭐ Need more insight and information? Check out this article by Mighty staffer @chronicallymeh here:

#ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #MentalHealth #Disability #Caregiving #RareDisease #Migraine #Stroke #CardiovascularDisease #AutonomicDysfunction #PosturalOrthostaticTachycardiaSyndrome #Spoonie #Lupus #Endometriosis #Cancer #Anxiety #PTSD #CheckInWithMe

Which Type of Physical Therapy Is Best for You?

Maximize your recovery by selecting the right physical therapy for your needs.
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We are in need of a new co-leader for MHC to encourage, empower, & support our members. I make a APPEAL to current members - PLEASE read below!

We are currently looking for a new Co-Leader for the Multiple Health Challenges group. We are growning fast and just passed 2,200 members. This is really exciting to me, however to be honest, I have been very frustrated that there is less activity recently and as our membership grows steadily the number of comments & replies has actually diminished. Our old co-leader Chris is no longer with the group and we need to have others step up and make up for her commitment to regularly respond to posts and comments. This means a collective effort from everyone in the group! I have had numerous layers of serious physical & mental health challenges recently and not been as active as I would like in order to step back and focus on self-care. This is a time having another co-leader to pick up the slack is essential!

My last post about hobbies was actually first posted 16 months ago (when we had at least 1,000 less members) and it got over 200 ❤️ & 👍and 100 comments then! It got only ONE this time. And Laura made a great post about disability after that and it got only two responses as well. When new members open up and post to introduce themselves and then get very little response that is even worse. I fear that new members will see this and not be active moving forward. This is OUR group everybody and it functions best when members support other members. We all have our varied health histories and with them the knowledge and wisdom we’ve garnered along the way! PLEASE let’s share these with each other. Without this empathy and understanding this group is falling short of what I first envisioned when I started the group and what it’s capable of.

For a co-leader I am looking for someone to welcome new members, comment or respond to posts and other comments & replies, and make new posts to the group. It is important for the group to have distinctly different voices to support people because people might relate more to either of us. What is a really good situation is if we both respond to the same posts, welcome new members from different perspectives and provide voices for people that are accessible and relatable. There is a commitment needed that you monitor activities on the group regularly and can respond pretty quickly.

Offering your own posts provides more content for the group. I can assist and support by offering to look at your new posts for feedback and editing before you post if you would like, will comment on your posts to get the responses going to best support your efforts, and I can help finding memes or images.

I look at potential leaders' history of posts and/or comments that have helped and supported others in the past. Willingness to be honest and open about your own health challenges is crucial to best support people.

You will get access to the Community Leaders group and your name will have a “Group Leader” tab next to it up top on your comments and responses so I think people pay attention especially to your activity and wisdom shared from your personal experience. Would you consider joining me on this journey? Let’s have a DM chat to discuss this! Thanks for considering taking on this role!

In service,

#Depression #Anxiety #MentalHealth #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #Chronicpainwarrior #Disability #BipolarDisorder #BipolarDepression #BipolarIIDisorder #Bipolar1Disorder
#ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #ADHD #Schizophrenia #AspergersSyndrome #Autism #Dementia #Concussion #Addiction #AddictionRecovery #Cancers #TraumaticBrainInjury #BrainInjury #LossOfAParent #Grief #Suicide #ChronicFatigueSyndrome #DistractMe #HIVAIDS #MightyQuestions #DownSyndrome #IfYouFeelHopeless #Hope #Deafness #neckpain #BackPain #CongestiveHeartFailure #Migraine #COVID19 #PeripheralNeuropathy #LymeDisease #Diabetes #EatingDisorder #Headache #Stroke #Cancer #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Fibromyalgia #Disability #thankful #grateful #CocaineDependence #drugaddiction #Alcoholism #PTSD #EmotionalHealth #physicalhealth #PainAcceptance #Acceptance #relief #Selflove #Selfcare #MentalHealthHero #TheMighty #RareDisease #MightyTogether #RareDisease

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What tips do you have for attending or throwing a wedding with chronic illness?

Living with a chronic illness can be challenging to manage (as we all know very well), but that doesn’t mean it has to stop us from enjoying and celebrating ourselves and the people around us. This enjoyment can include ceremonies like weddings which, depending on the size and place, can be overstimulating or overwhelming for those who experience low energy and high levels of pain.

What tips do you have for attending or throwing a wedding with chronic illness? What has been most helpful for you in managing your symptoms, communicating with others, and planning for the ceremony?

🎂 P.S. Dont know where to start? Check out these tips from Mighty @itselisajeann here:

#ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #MentalHealth #Disability #Caregiving #RareDisease #Migraine #Stroke #CardiovascularDisease #AutonomicDysfunction #PosturalOrthostaticTachycardiaSyndrome #Spoonie #Lupus #Endometriosis #Cancer #Anxiety #PTSD #CheckInWithMe

11 Tips on Making It to the Ceremony: A Wedding Party Guide for Those With Chronic Illness

"I’ve been a spoonie bridesmaid four times."
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Out of options & no support from family members

#ChronicIllness #AutismSpectrumDisorder #Stroke #Disorder #SpinalCordInjury #Undiagnosed #CognitiveDisorders Where to begin. I honestly feel like one of those people kicking a can down a lonely street. I saw the new primary & wouldn't you believe it he was "get him in get him out" mentality. He was pretty rude, didn't know what he was looking at,& told me it's transient. (yeah having steatorrhea with undue fatigue & urinary issues that lasted 18 months is a short term issue, you know what, there right I should just sit here & do nothing.) I've noticed a pattern male doctors have this pride of there's nothing wrong with you just sit there & though it out. Honestly that's what I want to do because no one else cares... Where as the females actually have a tendency to care. I don't know what it is I really don't. But with that aside, I'm done with doctors. There you happy now? I have a physical therapist who has here own attitude problem & is determined to not only get nosey with my doctors but diagnose an fnd issue. Well I have no choice but to agree with her. But, 18 months has done nothing to help the posture so there's that. Now, I'm doing a full vitamin panel against this doctors will (I'm just a burden.) I told him insurance would cover this test completely & that I had a chat with insurance & they said it's covered. Oh, I did complain about my problems porencephaly, laryngocele, spinal cervical degradation, mildly low Igm etc. She recommended a disability coordinator for this mess but now that I don't have a doctor anymore what can we do?

You know as a kid I always wanted to have friends so that I could learn to be normal...well I never got that opportunity, sad, but what can you do? I used to be envious of not getting a diagnosis so as to find my village. That has changed ever since the porencephaly diagnosis in December of last year. Now I don't care so much anymore. I'm uncertain if we will find an issue with my vitamins. I can't wait to come into physical therapy tomorrow & be told your doing this on purpose, knock it off! What a world we live in oh well. My life has gone up in flames because not only do I have to work on my own issues but I have to work on other peoples attitudes.

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What’s a tip you’d share with a student who lives with chronic illness to help them feel ready for the school year?

A new school year is about to begin (or may have already, depending on where you live!) and we want our Mighty students to be ready for success 💪⭐.

What are some tips, advice, or encouragement you would give to someone who lives with chronic illness — regardless of their age? How can they prepare themselves, while keeping their health in mind, for a new school year?

Share your advice with us in the comments below 📝, we might use it in a Mighty article!

#ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #MentalHealth #Disability #Caregiving #RareDisease #Migraine #Stroke #CardiovascularDisease #AutonomicDysfunction #PosturalOrthostaticTachycardiaSyndrome #Spoonie #Lupus #Endometriosis
#Cancers #Anxiety #PTSD #CheckInWithMe

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Hemorrhagic stroke survivor

New here as of today.

I'm coming up on 2 years post stroke. It's been difficult in an area of zero stroke certified Doctors or Physical Therapist.

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Model of Depression

If there is a TOP Ten list of unpopular topics, I believe mental illnesses would qualify.

To quote an answer in Quora: Illness and disease both cause the same feelings of discomfort, pain or unease in people. However, an illness is more of a subjective feeling. This means that there is really no identifiable reason behind the condition. If the condition behind the illness is identified, it is more often referred to as a disease. However, in more generalized terms, we can define an illness as a state where the person has feelings of pain or discomfort that does not have an identifiable reason.

Thus it is not easy to categorize depression as either illness or disease. If it is a subjective feeling that one does not feel well, then that is probably what it is; not feeling OK.

Sometimes one might not feel like walking up from bed but if it is due to tiredness from work and then one recovers the next day, that does not qualify as depression, isn't it?

Then if one were to feel sad for more than two weeks, it is likely a symptom of depression. So sadness itself is not depression, it is the duration and intensity of it that counts. It is more of persistent of several symptoms like anguish, anhedonia and even memory loss.

Till now, scientist have hypothesized several theories of depression like lack of neurotransmitter, genetics and environment. There is no one ultimate cause. So instead of looking for causes, I suggest a Model of Depression (Mode).

In the Mode, we can see how one condition lead to another without pinpointing any single cause as the beginning. Although rumination is not necessary the cause, we have some researches that point to it as major factor for symptoms of depression.

In another we are looking at all factors that could play together towards the experience of depression. When we look at the Mode, it gives a map of possible reasons and conditions that lead to depression.

Thus a depressed person could make an educated guess that his back pain could be a factor and then the person could work on healing the pain. So instead of over-thinking about why he has serious back pain and merely takes painkiller, he could explore possible solutions like acupucture.

The Model helps the person to better understand his own erratic thought and negative emotions like anger and anguish that could have serious long-term consequences if it is not dealt with proper interventions.

By looking at the Mode, the intervention for depression is not always talk therapy or medicines, it could be healing the physical pains too. Then we could also learn to relax the tensed body through massage or yoga as a form of interventions.

In the end we are looking at a holistic way of dealing with depression rather than just talk therapy and medicines.

Although we have problems in life, it is the way we look at the problems that is the problem too. So when we keep looking at depression as strictly mental illness, then we have limited options about how we can deal with the problem. In fact cognitive behavioral therapy is premised on the cognition, the way we think. Nonetheless negative thoughts seep into our minds unconciously and we keep replaying the thoughts and then we feel the negative emotions and back to the same thoughts like a broken record called rumination.

Then we might have narrow perspective on the problem: I am the problem or I cannot handle the problem.

The Mode offers us a different lens of looking at the same problem: I see the problems and find different ways for interventions. Then you must affirm that you have the power over the problem.

The Model of Depression is not a model of cause and effect. Rather it is acausal in looking how one type of condition could possibly affect other conditions based on widely available researches. In the model, a patient with stroke could feel bodily pains and discomfort leading to disturbed and insecure minds. The stroke patient could ruminate about her/his condition and that propagates mental anguish and bodily pains. Then the person could ruminate over his or her stroke. Thus depression could be seen a manifestation of mind-body conditions.

Researches have shown that rumination is prevalent in patients with clinical depression. Thus the repetitive negative thoughts been linked with symptoms of depression such as sadness, low mood and tiredness. Certainly it is linked with anxiety disorder. In the long run it could also lead to dementia and even Parkinson's Disease.

The model could help patients and anyone to be aware of how one bodily pains could also lead to mental disturbance to depression and the whole circle could continue until an intervention in implemeted.

The model also help us to understand why certain intervention like taking medications could reduce the symptoms of depression. If we were to look at the biological aspect of our bodies, medicines could affect neurotransmitter and thus the functionality of our synapes in the brain.

By now, we know that bodily pain could lead to depression and vice versa. Thus it might be helpful to reduce or massage away our bodily discomfort. Personally I am fully aware of that and I have gone for acupuncture to heal my stiff muscles and numbness in my fingers.

Since research points to strong link between depression and rumination and it is bi-directional; that means one could lead to another; we could also reduce rumination as an invervention.

Could one feel down due to lack of stimulation from hormones like oxytonin. Therefore exercise could release the hormone into the bloodstream and lead to less symptoms of depression.

This model helps us to pinpoint all possible interventions at our disposal in dealing with depression.

We know some depressed people suffer from memory loss. Is rumination or the state of depression itself contributes to the loss?

In a 2012 study, researchers tested sick and healthy people’s decision-making on a driving simulator and found that sick participants demonstrated significantly slower reaction time. This is in line with prior research showing that just feeling ill is associated with slowed memory and worsened mood.

So, our memory, reaction time, and mental health all appear to suffer when we’re ill and have higher levels of inflammation. In fact, when it comes to mood, the scientific connection between inflammation and depression has become quite robust.

Although we could not ascertain the exact causes of depression, the Mode provides us an overall view or map of all possible conditions that would present within our mind-body system for someone to show the symptoms of depression.

In terms of emotions regulation, it is interesting that Identifying was linked both to years in treatment as well as modalities in psychological treatment, but Processing (not Identifying) was linked to well-being across the general population.

Various modalities of treatment, including CBT and psychotherapy have a long history of enabling patients to identify emotions and understand their meaning within present and prior contexts. Expressing emotions and being able to communicate them is also a valued concept. However, Identifying was not linked to life-satisfaction scores, and Expressing was not a significant predictor after controlling for prior trauma variables.

This suggests that psychological treatments may want to focus more on processing emotions than only identifying them. There may be false beliefs, where the goal of treatment is simply to identify emotions and understand their meaning. However, these results suggest that without the capacity to modulate and refine them, well-being will not be increased.

Thus there has been a research and development of a digital therapeutic app (Nuowave) to fill the gap in treatment that is based on emotion processing, neuroplascity and music/sound therapy (proven to reduce symptoms of depression).

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