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Trying not to be envious

Some days I really question what the point is anymore. I try not to be envious or bitter towards others. Especially if the other is family.
I have always felt like the black sheep of the family. Yes i’m very introverted, shy and people sometimes takes my silence for not caring. I have always hated family gatherings because it means i have to be social.
With that being said i’m not sure how to feel or think when i found out my parents, sister and her family are planning a vacation in Alaska. No one asked us if we would be interested or not. This will be the 5th year in a row that they all have vacationed together somewhere other than a local lake. Ya we might not be able to afford it but would of at least like to have been asked.
We moved to where my family is, wife hoped would heal the rift between my family and me, to be closer. After 6 years we are talking about moving back to where her family is. Ya they her family annoys me but at least they make the effort. #angry #CheckInWithMe #bipolardisorder2 #BipolarDisorderII #hurtfeelings


#MixedEpisodes part 2: Do I REALLY have #BipolarDisorder Tho?

*My previous post was just a real-time, stream of consciousness post during a #mixedepisode .
I was diagnosed with #BipolarDisorder in 2008. Since then, I intermittently go through periods where I wonder if I really have bipolar. Maybe I was misdiagnosed. I have #CPTSD (complex PTSD) as well, and some of the symptoms mimic #Bipolar .. But something always happens that snaps me back to reality- that I do, in fact, have bipolar disorder. I'd had a #Telehealth appt w/my #Psychiatrist that morning, and she pointed out that I seem to be in a mixed state based on her observations, and what I was telling her. She has never said that to me in the almost 2 years we've been working together. She's mainly seen me #depressed , because I have #bipolardisorder2 , so I mostly experience #Depression .
I'd wanted to talk about what I've been experiencing on here, but just couldn't find the words. I've actually been trying for weeks to write a post. So yesterday, I decided after like 12 hours of fruitlessly trying to figure out what to say, that I was just going to do a real-time stream of consciousness post.
I've gotten to where I've accepted this diagnosis, most of the time. However, it's hard to deny it while in the throws of your thoughts turning into nonsensical scrambled eggs, and (sometimes) in a small corner of your mind being aware that your thoughts might not be logical, but not being able to stop it. ❤️


Living the manic life

Hello mighty friends. I've been in quarantine lock up for 9 days now, just a few more to go. At first I was bored and sick and sleeping all the time. Now I'm crawling out of looking for things to do. I feel the mania setting in and I need some quarantine tips on how to help manage it better. Thanks friends 💓


Been a year since last posted here.

As the title says, been a year since i wrote a actual post instead of just replying to people’s posts. Have lurked here but could never write something. Something inside always stopped me.
So what been life... survived my punishment and am still at my job. Been a constant change of coworkers as people think what i do will be easy or like tv only to find out it’s not easy or like tv. But at least the boss been around more, on every shift but mine so still don’t talk face to face.
Besides my normal monthly visits i now have a telepsych who has been helping me with meds to find the right combination. Still have moments where the cocktail of pills doesn’t work to point i need it and i have a bad low.
Kids are allowed back in school which lets me sleep during the day. Down side is i am not sleeping and my son is having a very hard time. We are going to have him evaluated for possible mental health diagnoses like my wife and i have.
All in all last year has been ok, ignoring the stuff going on in the world. #bipolardisorder2 #checkin #CheckInWithMe #Life #Parenting


What do you do to make yourself feel better when you are feeling the effects of cognitive decline caused by your medication / disorder?

I have accepted that I am going to deal with cognitive decline if I am going to take medication for my mental health, but managing the emotions attached to events that happen in relation to this issue has been difficult, what do you guys do to bring yourself back from the deep end when this happens ? #BrainFog #bipolardisorder2 #RapidCyclingBipolarDisorder #Anxiety #cognetivedecline #PTSD #GAD



When I was first diagnosed with Bipolar 2 disorder, I was trying to get out of a depressive episode and also on the wrong medication so I wasn't doing well and didn't understand what it meant but now as I start stabilizing on new medication and therapy. I find that the diagnosis makes sense but also scares me. I don't know how to accept it and I worry about my future. Sometimes the more I learn about it the more it scares me. #BipolarDisorder #bipolardisorder2 #MentalHealth

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#BreakingtheStigma #BipolarDisorder

Hi Mighties💪
so I decided to DO my APA Research Paper on #BipolarDisorder bc I know alot of people that have it and My fav band The Amity Affliction's lead singer was just diagnosed with #bipolardisorder2 and he is such an #Inspiration bc he sings from his ❤ and has the courage to express his #MentalIllness in his songs. I just want to be the ☀️⭐ #light in someone's life. #Psychologyclassislifechanging 💯💯💯