Benzos

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My wonderful child J. has had GAD and constant panic attacks for two months. We have seen an awful neurologist and a helpful psychiatrist; he and I are in therapy. Tomorrow we visit Cortica to rule out being in the spectrum (or rule in). I love my job; I love my children, J and N. My husband tried his best to help, but I had to push him. I feel the emotional, medical, and physical burden is on me. Last night, J had an adverse side effect on a new Benzo. He hallucinated for 5-6 hours. As a consequence, my husband ruled out benzos. We are waiting for the SSRI to kick in, but it might take three more weeks. Today the whole family worked from home, no school. We are exhausted. He asks me: why me? What did I do to deserve this? I do not want children because I do not want to leave this legacy. He is nine years old. I suffer from depression and anxiety. They are under control with meds, but I a making a U-turn. I feel alone and do not know where to go from here. Thank you for reading. #GAD #Autism #SensoryIssues #exhausted #y #SSRI #Medi #Benzos #mother #NeedSupport #Children #PanicAttacks #hard #choices #needsleep

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Socialization

Looking for advice- unfortunately, about two years ago when my anxiety was unbelievable, I got prescribed Xanax and did indeed become addicted. Very much so. It’s taken almost two years now but I’m almost off. My brains coming back. It’s exciting and also completely terrifying. I haven’t been able to work because of withdrawals, but I’m well enough now to at least get out into the world and start trying.
I miss life. I miss people.
The problem is, in my past, the people I had in my community as friends were not nice people. It’s not a great neighbourhood and holds a lot of dark memories from my past.
I don’t have many people to rely on or even see and it’s led to (along with other things) a huge crash in self esteem and confidence.
What are some things I can do to get out and be social without committing to a job yet? I’ve thought of volunteering but any other ideas are also helpful!

#Benzos #withdrawal #Xanax #valium #Socializing #BPD #social isolation #CovidIsolation #selfisolation #Newfriends

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Bpd- Rant lol #firstpost

I swear to god, any time I try to mention bpd in public or tell even the closest people, people still look at me like I’ve lost my fuxking mind. Like don’t worry y’all im not fucking contagious. Im a kind kind soul that really struggles and feels a lot in this world that is quite frankly terrifying. Im tired of being told that “I don’t bpd” by my mom, im tired of always overthinking and realizing how everything I did screamed bpd and I didn’t even know what it was. And I’m mad. Im mad that therapy isn’t free and im mad that mental health is still so stigmatized, especially bpd, and especially in black culture. Kanye’s story for example. It makes sense.
Im still team Pete all day lol he learned to manage his bpd which is awesome but yeah.. sorry, needed to rant… I am in recovery ❤️ DBT daily. Found out I had bpd after I’d been tapering off benzos at an extremely high dose and now im really aware so I needed to ramble, lol. Thanks everyone! Look forward to the day I share my story! 🙏🏼❤️ #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BPDDiagnosis #BPD #BpdRants #Benzos #Hope #Healing

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#Anxiety #PanicDisorder #PanicAttack #Benzos #Ativan #scared Doctor isn’t going to renew benzo script after five years of taking them.

What do you do when the doctor takes you off benzodiazepines abruptly? I have been on Ativan for 5 years daily and all the sudden I can’t get a refill. I have no insurance and am able to go to a clinic that does not prescribe scheduled meds. I am scared already knowing that I am going to hurt. I am trying to relax, ground, meditate, etc. But I am already freaking out and find it hard to cope. Very difficult and was looking for advice. Thanks.

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Maybe Pregnancy Isn’t in the Cards for Me

I have been on #Benzos and #Antidepressants for so long that I don’t know how I can ever get off of them to be #pregnant someday. After months of trying to be accepted by a psychiatrist due to every doctor not taking new patients, I was able to schedule an appointment with one, then the minute I told the receptionist that I wanted help weaning off #Klonopin I was told that the doctor doesn’t help patients do that, he helps them manage prescriptions. She cancelled my appointment and told me if he changes his mind, they’ll call me back. They didn’t. I feel so helpless and that I’ll never be able to carry a child and be a mother.

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What is the highest dose of #Xanax or #Benzos a dr has ever allowed you?

My psychiatrist has been giving me 1 mg Ativan 3x daily as needed. So 90 a month. It used to be that I barely got thru the script or had some left but since the narcissistic abuse, they barely touch my anxiety. The thing is they don’t help the obsession and that’s what causes my anxiety... I have a friend w a Xanax script who will give me some but I know that’s slightly more addictive and dangerous w alcohol, etc. just wondering what others get as therapeutic doses of #Benzos , #Ativan #Xanax etc. I do have #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder and #PanicAttacks ...