Canteat

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Jane

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@janestones

Anxiety 4y

I can't stomach today

Maybe if I force myself to eat today I can vomit out the butterflies invading my stomach. #Anxiety #Canteat

Post

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Anxiety 4y

I’m losing it

I have no desire to eat right now. I get hungry sometimes, but I can’t get myself to find food.

I miss people. I miss those awesome loving people I work with, whom I have no idea when I’ll see again. I miss my family, but I don’t dare ask if I can come visit because my stepdad is constantly joking that their house is quarantined to keep the virus out and I’m not allowed in without being tested for that damn virus, even though there’s only one confirmed case where I live and a few hundred where he lives. Yeah, I’m the one most at risk of catching it.

I’m constantly angry with my husband for reasons I honestly can’t figure out, but he’s the only person I get to see anymore.

And my classes being online started today. I put on makeup and a nicer outfit to give me a boost of confidence, but I got five minutes in and I’m already crying. the hunger doesn’t help, but preparing food, even a simple bowl of cereal, sounds worse than starving to death right now.

The best part is my favorite hobby’s, writing and crocheting, don’t require me to leave the couch but for some reason I can’t bring myself to doing either of those right now either.

I’m lost and alone and I’m going to fail this semester because of that damn virus and my damn anxiety. I worked so hard to make this be the semester that I finally passed every class, and then the world decided to go to hell.

I’m so sick of this.

thanks for reading my rant. I just needed to get that out.

#Anxiety #lonely #SocialDistancing #Canteat