christiansonthemighty

So I saw my therapist today and we covered a lot of things today especially dealing with changing my mindset and learning to accept things I can’t control and how to love and take care of myself and not let what people say or do affect me or pull me out of the character of A child of God don’t give them the my energy and not to let them illicit a response from me especially not a negative response I’m happy with my session today because I want to be a better man of God a better parent and a all around better person 🧍

I’m literally in pieces at the moment I honestly don’t know what to do! I’m mourning over the loss of a marriage and a friendship with a friend who I used to rely on. I’m missing both of them him and her because he was my best friend like a brother to me. And she was my wife I’m struggling with how to cope with not being with her anymore. It’s making me super uncomfortable and sad 😞. Now it seems like I don’t have him in my life anymore either. I’m also struggling because I’m scared 😱 that my first ex wife who’s the mother of my children is going to try and prevent me from seeing my kids. My soon to be ex wife and the mother of my kids are friends and I don’t want to lose the ability to see my children. I don’t even have my best friend to talk to anymore. I feel i don’t even know how to feel anymore? I’m under so much stress right now #Upallnight #CheckInWithMe . I don’t know if wanting to repair my marriage even if that’s a possibility which I doubt it is , is even the right way to feel? Because I don’t wanna go back to arguing or fighting or fussing with her but I do love her and miss her. In the end I want what’s best for her and myself. Like I literally don’t know what to do because I want to ensure I get to see my kids I do know that much for certain because I love them. Also I fear the future and what that looks like for me? I know as a Christian ✝️ that I’m fully supposed to put my Faith and trust in God above all else. It says in the Bible in the book of Matthew 6:33 ….—-> Matthew 6:33
King James Version
33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. So that’s where my focus needs to be. And I’m also at a new job my training is almost done and it’s a nice distraction but that’s exactly what it is a distraction and all that’s doing is delaying the inevitable right? I’m scared to face the things I gotta face head first. Like yes my marriage is most likely over permanently and that hurts to think about. Wanting my own place and a vehicle that’s weighing on my mind too. Just so many things going on in my life right now I’m so anxious 😬 I don’t want to attempt to go to sleep 😴 right now because if I take my meds and try it could send me spiraling 🌀 into a full blown panic attack and I definitely don’t want or need to have one of those anymore. I’m just so lost 😞 like I want to take this to Jesus Christ and lay all of this at his feet 👣. Because I’m struggling under the weight of all of this. I really need someone to talk to right now. #christiansonthemighty I feel so ashamed of myself right now and so depressed 😔

Scars and Healing

Scars by definition are a healed wound. Think about the scars you’ve collected on your body throughout your life.
The painful bumps and bruises, falls and surgeries that formed raised cuts that were once bleeding, and needed tending to in the process toward ultimate healing.
You cleaned, bandaged, checked to ensure there were no infection, and overtime witnessed, and experienced the miracle of healing. A lasting symbol of pain, time, and healing forming a perfect imperfect scar now in its place.
Resurrected Jesus chose to keep the scars in His hands, and feet, even after ascension, as a reminder to us of all he endured for us as a living sacrifice.
A sign of victory over death!
Jesus knew the doubting Thomas’s of the world would not believe unless they saw with their own eyes the scars of His suffering.
A correlation to some of the struggles of invisible illness and chronic pain itself, as some symptoms cannot be seen.
I scan my body over the countless scars,…seen and unseen. Some on my body, and some on my heart, but through life’s suffering, I have been transformed to a scar of healing.
My scars are victory over pain! An overcoming with unabounding strength (chadzek) to persevere in chronic illness, and life’s true purpose!
My countless surgery scars are a reminder of my calling to use my voice, and all I’ve healed along the way.
Each scar was painfully earned through a process of long-suffering and healing; and my voice will give praise, honor, and glory!
In my story, as I sing this song of hope of full restoration, I too, have chosen to keep my healed scars as my testimony of sealed faith to our Glorious Father!
My question to you is, will you keep your scars?

#christiansonmighty #IfYouFeelHopeless #InsideTheMighty #CheckInWithMe #Caregiving #Gastroparesis #BackPain #CentralPainSyndrome #ComplexRegionalPainSyndrome #MightyTogether #christiansonthemighty