sexual abuse survivors

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Boundaries #MajorDepressiveDisorder #PTSD #SexualAbuseSurvivors #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorde

I’m reading my new book boundaries. So far I’m getting the hang of it setting them. As children we wouldn’t dare tell anyone no. If we did it wasn’t taken seriously. During my 4 yrs of being #sexuallyabused by my brother he still did it even though it kept repeating the word No. So, after I set boundaries with mom she asked what my book was about 🤔 the tile speaks for itself I told her. I told her it’s teaching people what they will not allow that’s why boundaries are set. She doesn’t like the fact that I set the boundaries with her. I told her well that’s not my problem and I am not going back on it.

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Gaslighting #MajorDepressiveDisorder #PTSD #SexualAbuseSurvivors #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorde

I just found this on Facebook just a few minutes ago. My mom was basically gaslighting me. She had all these signs except the first one. No fucking wonder why I snapped. I stand up for those who don’t have a voice . The one comment she said still bothers me “You should have told us sooner “ I’m not dwelling on that comment like I did yesterday. I’m using my coping skills. I took a day off from walking today. My son was off so we played games.

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New psychiatrist #MajorDepressiveDisorder #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorde #PTSD #SexualAbuseSurvivors

I took the plunge and switched my mental health dr. I’m actually seeing a psychiatrist I normally see Np. The receptionist clearly stated they don’t prescribe narcotics like #zanax #Klonpin . I’m doing virtual with him but first intake appointment on Thursday. I still have trust issues about opening up to psychiatrist about my #SexualAbuse as a child since at age 12 a shrink didn’t believe me. A psychologist didn’t believe me either. I’m only going to disclose it once I gain trust or if I feel comfortable doing so

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Undiagnosed (C)PTSD

How is this possible??!! I watched Peter Cottontail and when the farmer chases the bunny my chest tightens, I can't breath, the panic grasps me and I begin to cry hysterically. Yet I can't get a Mental Health professional to diagnose me with PTSD let alone C-PTSD. It is the very organization of Mental Health that is driving me to a mental breakdown and insanity. When is it ok for the 'professionals' to become our abusers, tormentors and creators of immense trauma? Am I the only one that feels this is wrong on every level!!?? How is it that it is the very Mental Health system is 'allowed' to do this to innocent victims just looking for help to ease their pains? #CPTSD #MentalHealth #Undiagnosed #insanity #despondant #Trauma #Abuse #AbuseSurvivors #DomesticAbuse #ChildAbuse #ChildhoodAbuse #EmotionalAbuse #SexualAbuseSurvivors #I may look alive #Broken

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*TW* Abuse and the Cone of Silence

I’m watching the Jimmy Savile documentary. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse myself, the thing that intrigues me is how many signs there can be about a person, and even more shockingly, how often society ignores such red flags.

As an example, I reported our garden landscaper to child services for endangering his children some years ago. He had brought his young child to work on our property with an open industrial cutting blade in operation… and as we later found without any insurance. I was deeply uneasy about the child essentially working on our property and eventually my husband asked him to take his kid home because though he was ‘spending time with dad’, he was also doing so unsupervised and anything could have gone wrong. When it became clear that he had no intention of completing our garden, I started to gather screenshots from his social media to pass on to the authorities as evidence. It was then that I found pictures of both kids from when they were even younger regularly ‘helping dad with work’. He even bragged about one of them getting better with their garden skills, amd that is when I decided to raise my concerns with child protective services.

Because if I know one thing to be true; whatever questionable material someone is willing to post online, is the merely tip of the iceberg in terms of what they’re actually willing to do, or have done.

In our guy’s case it turned out money laundering, was also something he was willing to engage in—yet he isn’t in prison or on probation, he’s out there possibly looking to line up the next victim because I think conmen seldom know how to do anything other than con. Manson, Bundy, Zodiac, Madoff, Ponzi, Delvey, Holmes, Shkreli, Epstein, Maxwell, and Savile are all united in the sense that the accumulation of power and a desire to wield the hammer of power is at the heart of all acts of abuse. As the saying goes: absolute power, corrupts absolutely.

Though our conman has been reported via the appropriate channels, the wheels of justice in a country that is supposedly a first world nation, move painfully slow. And I’ve learned by baptism of fire, that the wheels won’t move at all unless you make enough noise—in my case I was forced to act as an unofficial coordinator amongst the victims at the urging of government agencies. Had I not used up my own time in this manner, the case against this person would have never amounted to anything at all.

And yet this is just a straightforward case of a cowboy builder… which begs the question of what hope do the victims of physical crimes stand? Or worse, those that are so vulnerable, that they cannot defend themselves?

Whether it is sexual, physical, psychological, emotional or financial abuse, it seems to me that there are always enablers.

For Jimmy Savile it was the BBC, the media, and his connection to public figures such as the Royal Family to all manner of celebrities, that likely stopped the CPS from investigating him several times throughout his career. For my conman I had every ‘bloke’s bloke’ in the village tell me off for “ruining” this man’s livelihood , including many verbally abusive messages from one of his mates undoubtedly with the intention of intimidating me. And yet I was not the one who had chosen to defraud members of our village to the tune of over £50,000, though I’m sure the true figure is likely much higher. And so many people who I got in touch with, told me that they’d simply written their financial loss off as a bad experience.

Here is where I take issue. For if every person before me had reported this man, chances are he would not have been free to continue his grift for as long as he did. And, it seems people don’t give much thought to elderly people who if conned, cannot simply go out and earn more money—they go without basic things like food and heating during the winter. Which in my mind to have contributed in any way toward the suffering of another is frankly unconscionable, even if the link is not direct, our failure to act on knowledge is to enable someone.

For my part I wish every person who looked the other way, was were forced to wear a Cone of Silence for upholding the Code of Silence that goes hand in hand with all instances of harmful conduct. If I witness a crime, flee the scene, and refuse to give testimony, then I would be perverting the course of justice (a fitting, yet unintentional pun).

This is not to say that the person committing the crime is not solely to blame for their actions, or to shame the victims. I’m saying that for every Jimmy Savile; there is at the very least one person who knew something and failed to do anything about it. The look the other way mentality that allows many abusers the freedom to keep abusing.

Abusers do not truly act alone, the Code of Silence becomes their co-conspirator and in my opinion those who areof sane mind who enable abuse of any kind should be held to account for their silence. And we as a collective society set the stage for perpetrators to more easily get away with abuse by upholding idioms and credos like “bro code”, “snitches get stitches”, “don’t tattletale”, “what was she wearing”, “stay in your own lane”, and that festering old chestnut “it’s a family issue”.

It is for this reason in my opinion; that as long as society continues to justify looking the other way in this manner, abuse will be here to stay.

#Abuse #AbuseSurvivors #DomesticAbuse #DomesticAbuseSurvivors #EmotionalAbuse #PsychologicalAbuse #SexualAbuseSurvivors #SexualAbuse #ChildhoodSexualAbuse #ChildhoodEmotionalAbuse #Trauma

3 reactions 4 comments

CPTSD and pyschadelics

I'm a bipolar and undiagnosed cptsd sufferer. I am an ex child protection social worker
I'm completing an MSc in adult mental health and am really interested in treatments using pyschadelics
Anyone had any success alleviating symptoms with these all #CPTSD #BipolarDisorder #Csa #Fibromyalgia #SexualAbuseSurvivors #SuicidalIdeation 🧙‍♀️❤️🙏🙂

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I want to confront a few of the narcissist that have thought I kept their secrets out of them being better than me. I kept the secrets to protect others who could not deal hearing the truth. I don’t want an apology and I’m not wanting to do this to cause any troubles. I don’t know if I can let move on from the trauma if I don’t say my peace. I have taken the time to seek out and participate in long term mental health therapies. I put in the work to love myself again. I know that there will be deflecting and I will be ok with it all. I just want to say what has been on my heart so that I can move on. I guess I’m asking for a second opinion if it’s a good idea or am I just being triggered not thinking clearly. Thanks #CPTSD #PTSD #Anxiety #SexualTrauma #ChildAbuse #ChildhoodTraumaSurvivors #SexualAbuseSurvivors

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I’ll Never Understand #MightyPoets

I’ll never understand why he did what he did to me.
I’ll never understand why she didn’t protect me.
I’ll never understand why she abandoned me.
I’ve been told that it’s better that way- not knowing.
I’ll never understand why I won’t get an apology or an explanation- I have given up trying.
I’ll never understand why they chose me.
I’ll never understand. But maybe that’s the point.
I’ll just never understand I guess.
And that’s okay.

#Abuse #PTSD #SexualAssault #SexualAbuseSurvivors #EmotionalAbuse #abandonment #Poetry #Trauma

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Does writing about trauma help you?

Writing in detail about my trauma is very unsettling but I also find it to be very liberating. Because I experienced sexual abuse, going into detail drags up bad memories but it also puts a lot into perspective. Does anyone else do this? Does it help at all? I also experienced emotional abuse.

#SexualAbuseSurvivors #Trauma #PTSD #EmotionalAbuse

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I am about to disable DMs

Seriously, guys! The Mighty is NOT a pickup site! If one more person brings my physical attributes into an inbox conversation, I'm disabling my inbox and, if there is no option for this, I will just never open my inbox again!

Seriously! There are some of us with unprocessed sexual and/or relationship trauma and your comments about our physical attractiveness is super triggering!!!

#creepy #catfisher #SexualAbuseSurvivors #Relationshipabuse