Sinus Tachycardia

I am so sick of healthcare providers blowing off my concerns and not explaining things to me. When I had COVID, no one thought it mattered that my oxygen levels were dropping at home when I was moving around because they were fine at the clinic and hospital while I sat there. No one will tell me why I supposedly don't need to be concerned that my heart was enlarged on my last CT. And the doctor I saw after the hospital because I couldn't get in to see my primary, blew off all my concerns and told me that either all the issues were caused by dehydration or that it wasn't an issue at all. Didn't matter that my labs showed I was not dehydrated, and that it's not normal to have a pulse over 120 for 8+ hours straight. And the acting like I'm exaggerating the memory and cognitive issues I've had since getting COVID is driving me nuts too. Plus, I've been dealing with this stuff for years because I usually don't wheeze when I have an asthma attack so most doctors assume that because there's no wheezing I'm fine and just making it up. Or having to explain to doctors that I am immunocompromised so that infection they think is going to clear up on its own definitely won't.

So still having a ton of issues that need to be handled. But I don't have anyone to go to appointments with me, and I don't have the energy to fight with all these doctors who don't know me and won't listen to me/take me seriously. So now my friends and coworkers (and probably soon my family) are on my case because I am putting my foot down and refusing to be seen by any healthcare provider who doesn't know me. At this point it means I have to wait longer to get seen to address all this stuff, but I honestly would rather wait and risk something happening while I wait so I can see a healthcare providers who knows me and my history and will listen to me and explain things well. So have to wait almost a month to see my primary, but I did at least let them put me on the wait list in case there's a cancelation sooner...I think the scheduler thought I was nuts for taking that appointment since heart issues are one reason I need to be seen but I'm over it.

I finally told someone that I am so fed up with this crap, that this is a hill I'm willing to die on. I shouldn't have to fight to be believed and taken seriously as a patient. #COVID #SinusTachycardia #Hypogammaglobulinemia

Hi all! I’m Autistic and I’m looking for someone in the Autistic community (or not necessarily Autistic, all are welcome!) that perhaps would be able to relate. I’m labeled as “high functioning” (I hate functioning labels with my entire soul, but that’s for another post) I identify and remember people I meet by the sound of their voice. I have a lot of difficulty visually recognizing people, even people that I know very well, just by appearance. If a friend changes their hair colour, I could probably walk right by and not even recognize them. I feel really bad about this, as it’s not intentional. All my memories, how I learn and retain information is associated with sound/music. I hum/sing constantly and I have and can pick out perfect pitch.

I haven’t been out very much due to my poor physical health but on Sunday my husband and I took our dog to a park outside of my town. A woman started talking to me and we chatted for almost 20 minutes. I recognized her voice immediately but could not identify who she was by looking at her. As we left the park, it clicked. I had met her one time in September of 2015... I even remembered her name. My husband, who by now, is used to my neuro-typical brain and my memory/savant-like mind, was even taken aback.

I just feel so strange, alien-like. It’s not like I could say “hey I know you, we met once back in September 2015”.... that, I’m sure would scare her half-to-death. I find it challenging to maintain new connections/friendships because of my memory and abundance of knowledge about many things, that no one my age really cares to hear about. I keep my mind and interests to myself but it gets pretty lonely. I enjoy intellectual conversation sometimes but I also can be silly so Its hard for me to find friends who have the same kind of balance. I’m fortunate to have enough friends who I’ve known for ages, but my friendships are very one-sided, not really fulfilling. I’m the one who listens and helps, but it’s never reciprocated. I’m the only one without children (so by default, I’m left out). I try my very best to ask questions and take interest in my friends’ lives, be the best “Aunty” to their children but it’s so hard when my friends don’t take interest or ask anything about my life or things that are important to me. I’m not sure if that sounds selfish, but that not my intention. I’m so happy to hear about other’s lives but it can get mentally exhausting when my only purpose in a conversation is to listen and I feel like my friends take advantage of that.

Just wondering if anyone can relate or have these types of feelings and issues around connecting with people. It gets pretty lonely, so it would just be reassuring to me knowing that I’m not the only one. Thank you in advance to those who choose to like or comment. 💛😊 #Autism #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #EatingDisorders #irritablebowelsyndrome #GERD #SinusTachycardia #DegenerativeDiscDisease #Endometriosis #Migraine #ChronicPain #ChronicFatigue

So, I just got home from yet another stay at the psych ward today, and as I looked at my discharge paperwork, I see this listed on my diagnoses: "Factitious disorder imposed on self, recurrent episode" and "factitious disorder imposed on another, recurrent episode," which is very confusing. I guess by "another" they must mean my mom, as she believes in me? I can't think of anyone else, as I don't really have anyone else, except my dad and my neighbor, who's my only friend.

Anyways, that pisses me off, especially as it's listed alongside real diagnoses (bipolar type schizoaffective disorder, autism spectrum disorder, borderline personality disorder, and bulimia nervosa). But I'm trying to just shrug it off.

My mom thinks she knows the psychiatrist who might've put those false diagnoses there. That particular psychiatrist basically asked my mom if I might be "faking it all".

How am I "faking it all"???? I literally see what I see, I hear what I hear, I think what I think, I've been through what I've been through, and I do what I do because I'm hurting on the inside at the time. And "faking it all"?? Just because ECT and most meds don't work for me or need to be changed doses?? How am I "faking it all" when my heart rate was literally 147 and my EKG was abnormal (the first abnormal EKG I've ever had in my life) showing sinus tachycardia just from a panic attack?

I only tell the truth when it comes to my mental and physical health. What's really confusing is the psychiatrist said to my mom that I still needed to stay in the psych ward at that time because I "still have mental illness". Okay, now how does that make any sense whatsoever? How can I "still have mental illness" yet be "faking it all"?

**TW** I guess what I've been through doesn't matter. The repeated emotional abuse I witnessed from my dad towards my mom and the time where he raised his fist and almost hit my mom in front of me as a child must be fake memories. My sexual assault must be a fake memory. All those times where I had to use my "coping skills" as a child when my dad would go off on my mom for no particular reason by saying all the curse words I knew with an A at the end while hiding behind the couch must be fake memories. But she, the psychiatrist, doesn't know any of this. She doesn't know in the past. My childhood friend repeatedly holding me down and beating me up for no particular reason (seriously, I did nothing to piss him off ever, I swear) while I cried. She didn't care enough to get to know me that deeply.

Yeah, all I can say is, this psychiatrist is the problem we have in the mental health system today. No one believes anyone until they end up dead I guess.

#SchizoaffectiveDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder   #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder   #Autism   #AspergersSyndrome #MentalHealth