Sleeping Sickness

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Recently, i am having terrible sleeping problems.. I mean i can't sleep the whole night.. But, the whole day i feel sleepy.. When it’s night, my sleep just disappears.. My psychiatrist prescribed me a specific medicine for my sleeping problem.. But, sometimes it seems not to work.. The whole night i am just awake.. My lights are off, i close my eyes and try to sleep for a long time but i can't.. That’s why, i can't even function properly in the day.. It’s also affecting my health.. I feel like i wanna sleep but i can't.. It’s bothering me a lot.. Also whenever i try to sleep, i feel so suffocated and i am even afraid to close my eyes sometimes for this.. My chest gets heavy and i can't seem to breathe.. If anyone here has any solution or some experience like this please share.. I really wanna know how you guys cope up with this... #Depression #MentalHealth #Anxiety #SleepApnea #SleepingSickness

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Believe and trust yourself, put yourself first!

I want to share some feeling here with you as I know many of us has experienced this.
Some weeks ago i was really bad, had #Anxiety , was #sleeping #bad, feeling bad, and so on, I guess you perfectly know this situation.
And during that time i thought i have a paranoia or sticky thoughts.Feels like some good friends in the workplace are cheating behind me, that something really bad is going on around me.
I thought it just seems to me, that people can't do such kind of things so I blame myself to have this unhealthy hesitations. I was trying not to fix this kind of action, I made me think "Maybe she has a bad day, or some personal issues", "She could not do that to you", "Maybe it's just a lack of empathy, nothing personal".

However, after some time this all turned to be true, every single thing, every single action turns to be a reality.
I don't want to tell a whole story here.. but now I have to find a new job.

So, all I want to say: Before blaming it on your emotional health, let yourself think that some people can really hurt you and make problems for you. It's not your sticky thoughts.
Believe and trust yourself, put yourself first and don't let them harm you!   #Anxiety
#Thoughts   #Paranoia   #SleepingSickness

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Sick and Tired #SleepingSickness

Without my #Cats informing me that their meals are due, my schedule would no doubt consist of something akin to one of a night-worker.

Instead I subsist on a few hours sleep per night ( #Insomnia ). The evading rest with possible #SleepApnea combined with loving nudging mewing causes me to become more and more exhausted each day.

Today my batteries couldn’t continue (the image of swapping them around in the TV remote to eek out a few more moments of functionality comes to mind). By 11am I was feeling nauseated and dizzy.

My fatigue was exaggerating my #Autism as my subconscious couldn’t muster the ability to use #SocialMasking and the #Clumsiness attached to my #Dyspraxia kept causing me to constantly collide my flailing limbs with inanimate objects. #Forgetfulness is the bane of my life which is even worse when I am not just responsible for myself #Carer #AutisticCarer but it had reared itself up with surprising frequency in the 4 hours I had been awake so far.

I decide to be kind and relent on my usual rule of not napping when I can’t sleep properly at night, and give myself a few hours: followed by a relax in the bath listening to my favourite podcasts.

A quick recharge before real life had to continue.

However, when my alarm went off it was like my body was heavier than normal, my vision was unfocused, and my usually over-active mind was filled with one thought: #Sleep

My “kitten” kept watch over me like a little furry nurse-maid, giving me a quick nuzzle and a loving purr the few times I opened my eyes. Until the next meal-time eventually stirred my limbs into shifting into actual movement.

I thought about taking the evening off; having that bath, burning some incense, and catching up on of those long-recorded programs...but an email that I had forgotten for for the nth time reminds me that that nap was probably as selfish as I can be today.

It’s now nearly 7pm and I’m still going to have that bath ... but after dealing with reality once more.

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Cry cry

I always can rate how my day has gone well by how many tears I cry. Some days can be positive but some I can think nothing of myself.

Sometimes I can cry over the smallest things and then over apologise for being so sad. It’s hard for those who don’t know the situation but are quick to judge.

But sorry for what? Sorry for being sad? Sorry for being me?

How does anyone else cheer themselves up when you get triggered?

#BadDay #52SmallThings #AnxietyTriggers #Anxiety #Depression #breakdown #SleepDeprivation #SleepingSickness #Lifestyle #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth #MightyQuestions #Other

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Not AGAIN? WHAT IS ENOUGH?

I am starting work in 2 days time. I am losing my sleep since last week. I dont know whats wrong with me. And today I am having panic attack every single hour. I cant relax. Whats wrong with me? My hands and feet are shaking like mad. I am breaking out in cold sweat. I am having fainting spell. I feel like vomiting whatever medications i took. i cant breathe normally. My head is spinning like crazy. I am hearing negative of my trauma pasts that I cant make it, I am stupid, I am a failure.... I dont know what is really wrong with me. Flash backs of whatever nonsense i went through is back.

#MajorDepressiveDisorder #PanicDisorder #Anxiety #Migraine #PTSD #SleepingSickness #SleepDisorders

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