stillfighting

A lot happened with our family and friends the past 5 years.

We had a high schooler graduate,

we now have a high schooler.

We’ve made many memories with friends, hockey and cabin trips.

We welcomed new nieces into our family,

our nephew joined the air force and flew to another country.

We were able to watch our parents retire,

living vicariously through them as they traveled near and far in RV’s.

We built our dream house,

and became part of a community that feels like home.

We celebrated anniversaries in various ways,

from trips to Victoria to the gift of a bidet.

And I would’ve missed it all if I had died by suicide on this day, 5 years ago.

#MentalHealth #Suicide #thankful #stillfighting

So I'm in the process of being interviewed about ritualistic abuse I lived through as a child (I'll try to avoid going into detail of actual abuse and just stick to talking about my situation now)

Basically due to covid (an other reasons) the interviews were put on hold..
the second I wasn't being interviewed more and More memories started coming back again, then I found out they are angling the case Just towards my biological father and Not the ring of powerful child killers he 'worked' with, this leaves me very afraid for my long term safety.

Well now my brain undug at least two other perpetrators I was trafficked to.
it's like the police saying they are just going after him meant my brain had to release memories of everyone else that it Knows need to be held accountable for the things they have done!!

My biggest concern with them saying that (,well there are Many!) Is that the information that I gave them that they Don't want to ask me any questions about.. is the bit that includes all the murder crime scenes I was at or taken to at..
It's the bit that includes all the rich and powerful people, but it's also the bits where my bio father and others killed children!

I'm worried he will end up with just a slap on the wrist and his name on the a register.. when he and at least 15 other 'men' should be going down as mass murderers!!

How can they call this justice?
How can they try and make this Just a historical family abuse case?
How can the system hide such horrors?
How am I meant to battle this All alone?
How can the police put my life in danger and protect serial killers?
What is actually wrong with the world!?!

#Barelycoping #childhoodabusesurvivor #Nojustice #MeToo #Childhoodtrauma #helpme #NeedSupport #warriorsurvivor #WritingThroughIt #emotionalflashback #somaticflashbacks #scared #tired #stillfighting #twistedworld

I've got a stomach bug and have been sick for 3 days, now my fibromyalgia is flaring Massively and I still have constant stomach cramps..

Feeling physically battered makes it soo much harder to deal with the hurdles I have piling up around me..
I feel swamped mentally and physically!

I was giving statements to the police about horrific ritualistic abuse and torture I was put through as a child, they have put the interviews on hold.. they said due to a new strain of covid but then went on to say it's because the lead investigating officer hasn't sent over the rest of the notes I handed in.... So mostly because they are not doing their job again!!

It's been nearly a year since I first came forward, I have been put on hold so many times..
I've given 2 interviews out of likely 8-9 needed and again they stop me..
It's completely disempowering!

It's so wrong that you can come forward about rings of child abusers and murders yet be treated like it doesn't really matter, told "oh I thought you might like to put it on hold for a year.. 5 years, 10 years.."
They want to sweep me and what happened to countless children under the rug.

I sit here asking myself how do I keep going? Keep putting my life at risk to report these crimes.. when the people who are meant to investigate constantly boy you off or gaslight you?
When the system is just so broken that they get bribed to cover up the bodies left in the wake of the rich..
How then am I meant to keep faith in what I'm doing?
All my energy is been plowed into this! reporting it and trying my hardest to take down an indoctrinized paedofilile ring.. alone.

There is No specialist help for people in my situation, I can't even find a uk charity that deals with this level of abuse or has support for my kind of Survivors..
It's a lonely pit of emptiness and people like me are just meant to stand alone??

All I know is trusting the system is more dangerous than poking a sleeping crocodile up the nose!

But I won't give up, I won't be deterred.
I won't let the process effect my mental health.
This experience is supposed to be empowering.. the way the police are dealing with it makes it feel the exact opposite!

It's like being stripped again of all power! any hiding and safe guarding I have put in place over the last 23 years to keep myself hidden from those people feels pulled away from me..
They questioned my bio father 6 months ago now, he has had more than half a year to hide his thorphies and build up a defence of lies.
While I'm still waiting to be interviewed I have to live with the fact they are still free to hurt children..
This feeling of being powerless to stop it is driving me mad today!!

#CPTSD #Abuse #AbuseSurvivors #Survivor #struggling #fibroflare #Fibromyaliga #fuckitall #stillfighting #CheckInWithMe #alone #wheretoturn #PTSD #MeToo #ChildhoodAbuse #Childhoodtrauma

I’m finally 30 years old. Holy shit. I never thought I would hit this age. #stillfighting

#Epilepsy 6 days ago I completed 5 years with my long life companion epilepsy . It’s been really tough . I had a lot of ups and downs , but I survived . I went through hell , but came back stronger . It’s a long journey a very long one actually but what keeps me going is the faith in a better future . I have seen a lot of people who survived and defeated Epilepsy and now are seizures free and I trust that one me and you guys will join them and be finally free .#Epilepsy #stillfighting #StayStrong #Hope

I’d like to share my experience of discrimination against me due to my EUPD diagnosis. I was unconditionally accepted for university to study social work. They then assessed me and said I’m not “stable” because I have a mental health care team. I mean, I have EUPD. The clues in the name. But I engage with my help and support. I worked a job for three years and lived alone for three years. Yet I’m not deemed stable because I was prescribed diazepam 3 months ago due to family issues and work stress. I cry discrimination and they cry policy and procedure. All I can say is, it is their loss. #proud #stillfighting

Hello everyone. This is my first post.
Everything has been going downhill since my only and my best friend, said very hurtful things to me and ended our friendship. It's been just over 2 weeks but I'm struggling to do simple tasks, my pain and fatigue rule my life now. I struggle to shower or wash my hair, this morning I have to force myself to shower and eat breakfast. How can i survive and fight this fatigue that plagues me day in and day out?