Adviceplease

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Considering #Career #Counseling #MentalHealth

(Photo from my recent vacation)

Having recently come to the conclusion that I cannot continue in my current #Job beyond the next 5 months, I have been stuck in swirling #Uncertainty . My job is making my mental health worse, but poor mental health makes it very difficult to look for a new job.

Last week, my therapist suggested that I consider working with a career counselor to help me work through some of my questions and challenges. I just had a free consultation call with a potential counselor, and I think I might go forward with it.

Naturally, it is even *more* expensive than my regular therapist, but she seems to have a system where she feels confident about what can be accomplished in her packages of 3 sessions or 10 sessions. I tend to have the view that my situation is just so complicated that no one could possibly help me break through all the muck and mire that quickly, but I recognize that that view may not be accurate.

I know that I need to do something different because just continuing to do the same thing has not helped me gain any forward momentum . I'm a bit afraid to spend so much money and just end up back where I started. I know part of that is the #Depression talking - "everything is bad and nothing will ever get better" - but it is a difficult mindset to overcome when trying to make a #Decision .

Have any of you ever worked with a career counselor? What was your experience like? Would you recommend it?

#Adviceplease

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How did you know? #Undiagnosed

How did you know something was wrong and how did you know what questions to ask your doctor?

(For context, I am in my mid-thirties.)

15 years ago, I was working a heavy janitorial job one summer and I developed serious pain in my hands and wrists. It was so bad that my hands were screaming if I just tried to grip a zipper and zip up a hoodie, for example. I tried physio therapy, but it made a minimal effect. Then that same summer I was in a car accident and got soft tissue damage to my left thumb and wrist. It took nearly seven years for that to more or less get back to normal. Even now, if I knead bread, chop a lot of veggies, scrub the bathtub, etc. both my hands feel stiff and sore the next day.

I first started to notice some knee and hip stiffness 5 years ago. Nothing major - just couldn't comfortably sit with crossed legs (crisscross applesauce) on the floor anymore. Since 2014, I have also been having some difficulty with swelling in my feet, ankles, and lower legs during (mostly) long flights or bus journeys. Now, the swelling happens within just a couple hours in a car or if I am on my feet in the kitchen for more than three hours. I think I have some permanent swelling at the top of my knees, too.

Last night, I spent an hour catching up on washing dishes, and when I woke up this morning, I felt like I'd been hit by a truck. I know people say that when you hit your thirties, your body starts breaking down, but this can't be normal.

Both my parents have arthritis and my paternal great aunt had multiple sclerosis. There is also a lot of cancer (many different kinds) within my family, including immediate family members.

In October, I convinced my doctor to requisition a blood test and he did an "autoimmune panel", but he hasn't followed up. One of the values was slightly out of range, but, knowing him, he would probably just dismiss it. I get such bad anxiety doing phone appointments with him that I certainly don't want to call and ask him to follow up.

So. Should I be concerned? Is this just normal body-falling-apart-in-my-thirties?

#Undiagnosed #Adviceplease #Arthritis #MultipleSclerosis #JointStiffness #Diagnosis #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder

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Help #Autism #Relationships #ADHD #Adviceplease

So, if a it crazy that I FOR REAL think that I am high functioning autistic but am 45 and never been diagnosed. I have been researching it more and more since I have been in a more serious relationship because it seems to ‘show’ more now that I am not focused on only me. Up till now I had the perfect job for my situation and other than I just stay home and do me…how I like….but now that isn’t always something I can do. I have always known I was different but I just lived on my own doing my own thing in my own fashion so it worked. Now I have to share life and all the things that get to me are getting to me!!! And if this is the case how does a 45 year old even try and be diagnosed. As a kid I was diagnosed ADHD and I NEVER fit in anywhere. But now I am adult and can’t afford much so what do I do????

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After some advice

A couple of weeks ago I restarted trampolining after 15 months off due to covid. The sessions have been FANTASTIC and I am so happy to be back. Unfortunately I believe its having a knock on effect on me and I don't quite know what to do.

I have non-radiographic axial spondyloarthritis, a form of inflammatory arthritis that predominantly affects my spine. I believe trampolining is causing an increase in pain in the days after which is manageable. The bigger problem is my sleep. I feel amazing after training and am buzzing. I get a lot done in the afternoon afterwards because I have energy. (Tramps is 12-2pm on Saturdays). Sundays I've been sleeping in because I've crashed and then having a chilled out day. I then go to bed a little late at 10pm ish (9pm is ideal for work). Monday morning I'm a bit tired but get up OK and have energy like normal. After lunch I get sleepy but push through. Then as soon as work finishes I CRASH. I crash and sleep, like full deep should-be-the-middle-of-the-night sleep. Waking up is hard. Then of course I'm wide awake and buzzing again and can't sleep at night (cue posting this at 1am). Last week this continued for several days. If I try to stay awake in the evening I am a total zombie and can't cook dinner or do anything. It feels like my body clock shifts forwards by a few hours.

Has anyone else experienced this type of reaction to exercise? Did it get better with time? Any tips on managing it?

I'm going to try a lunchtime nap tomorrow to see if that can help reset my sleep schedule. It's sometimes difficult to fit in though as I have a lot of meetings atm, and a 10 or 30 min nap just isn't enough. I need at least 1hr30 to get a full sleep cycle in. I did that last week when I eventually fit it in on Thursday and it helped. It's not a sustainable option long term though :/

#ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #axialSpondyloarthritis #Arthritis #Fatigue #Sleep #sleepproblems #Advice #Adviceplease #advicewanted #Exercise #AnkylosingSpondylitis

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Is my mother manipulative? Or am I just anxious? #SocialAnxiety #Anxiety

Recently I have been thinking about this. I know it’s weird because why would a mother want to manipulate her daughter? Hopefully someone experienced in this will be able to give me some advice and hopefully this is not a trigger for anyone. This morning I had some minor dispute with my mother. After that I feel that she avoid talking to me. I still get my meals, but she did not talk to me at all, she wasn’t showing any unhappiness on her face, she was talking to everyone else and enjoying herself. This afternoon I cried while writing my journal. She walked in to ask if I wanted dinner. I shaked my head, I couldn’t speak from the crying. She walked out quickly, took her dinner and started watching a movie on the television. She should have saw me cry. I wonder whether she is trying to tell me that she will show any concern for me even if I am having an anxiety attack if I do anything that upsets her. Not the first time that she made me feel that way, and she react differently everytime I cry, sometimes she would show me concern but sometimes she just do this. She treats other family members the same way too. My father was unhappy that she have not been cooking dinner, and made a remark that she should be free to make dinner since she is a housewife. My mother made him cook dinner on Sundays, he have not cooked for years, and she would not tell him if she realise he is making some mistakes, when his dish turn out badly, she would seem happy and would use the chance to throw sarcasm at him. When my younger sister would not listen to her, she would ignore my younger sister and become friendly with me. Now that I think of it, I wonder whether my social anxiety developed under 26 years of manipulation. Is this manipulation? Or am I just too sensitive because of my social anxiety? What should I do? I feel scared at this thought, scared that I would find out that my mother is manipulative, also scared that I would realise I am just a failed daughter who don’t even trust her mother. Please help me, thank you.
#Depression #GAD #Adviceplease #help #Manipulative #Relationships #mother #MentalHealth

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I suffer from daily chronic headaches and horrible migraines and my neurologist prescribed Migranal, a DHE spray. Has anyone tried this? Side effects?

#Migraines #ChronicMigraines #ChronicPain #ChronicHeadaches #SideEffects #Anxiety #Adviceplease

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Hi #New #BPD #Autism #Adviceplease #Anxiety #Relationships

Hi everyone,

I’m new to The Mighty, but I like what I’ve seen so far. I have Borderline Personality Disorder and Generalised Anxiety Disorder (among others) and the lockdown isolation has been really rough on me.

I have been in isolation since March with my fiancé, that I love immensely. However when it comes to supporting my mental well-being and understanding my emotions etc. He is unable to help me. He has high functioning autism, he is incredibly intelligent and to talk to him briefly you wouldn’t even know. I guess that’s why I sometimes forget when I’m struggling mentally. Yet I feel like I am currently having to look after his emotional and mental well-being above my own and I’m pushing my emotions down to try and stop them from upsetting him because he gets frustrated that he can’t process them and help me. More and more I can see myself taking a carer role, or a counsellor role with him instead of a romantic one.

Any advice on how I can somehow reconcile the two (or three) personalities in this scenario because I was struggling I was just borderline, now I’m borderline and carer and fiancé and then there’s his personality on top. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore :(

I’m not receiving any treatment except medication and haven’t been able to acquire any psychological support in over 2 years.

Anyway, that’s me and my life at the moment...

take care and stay safe.

you are important.

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Advice?

I recently saw some self-inflicted cuts on my 11 y/o cousin which is triggering some old emotions of mine. I don’t know what to do or how to approach it. I’m so worried about her and i’d be devastated if she went down the same painful path I went through...any advice? #Adviceplease #Selfharm

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I'm 22. I've been diagnosed with anxiety and depression for several years but was only diagnosed with bipolar 2 yesterday. I'm not an angry person, I've never done anything dangerous and I've only ever had one manic episode. I didn't realize that it was at the time, but apparently waking up at 4 am and deciding to buy $2,000 worth of new furniture qualifies. (I had a fully furnished home). I never imagined myself as bipolar, even though my biological father had it. I feel like my whole world just shifted a little bit. Now its it's all about medications and therapists and psychiatrists. I haven't been working for about a month because of a depressive episode that resulted in me getting put in a mental hospital. I'm trying to stay positive and remember that this diagnoses does not define me. Any advice or thoughts would be incredible.
#bipolar2 #newdiagnoses #Adviceplease

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#Adviceplease

Feeling extremely nervous because tomorrow I have court for a child support modification hearing. I received a letter from the state saying my son’s father is making more money so they set up the court hearing and everything not me so I don’t know what to expect at all! I haven’t seen my sons father in 9 years, he is not in my son’s life he just pays child support so I feel like it’s going to be very awkward and uncomfortable for me specially with my anxiety I’m so worried.

Does anyone have any advice on how this works?
#Depression #Anxiety #AnxietyAttacks #SocialAnxiety #Worried #scared