Repost: I wanted to die
This is a repost of my letter to my twelve year-old self when I was in deep depression and suicidal. I hope this letter can help others. May is mental health awareness month.
#SuicideAwareness #MentalHealth #Depression #Teen
This letter is a long time coming, a long time of struggle and success, of unrequited love and true love. Of discovery and longing and contempt. Of happiness and sadness. But you make it and you overcome all obstacles. And now all that's left is a letter between good friends.
Audrey, I wish I could have been there with you and guided you through it all. I wish I could have been your voice of reason and the hand that stopped you even before that morning dawned. I would have told you about all the wonderful things you are capable of and how many faces smile because of you. I would have shown you that you were not and are not alone. That the sadness subsides, always subsides and happiness is a closer friend. That the bullying wasn't forever and that life gets better. Life has a funny way of laughing when we're down, but we don't give in, we grab it by the scruff of its neck and scream. Because we are worth more.
Little Audrey, this letter comes to you during a strange time when you are experiencing new thoughts and feelings. Everything is twisted and on its head, you are hearing voices, but you can't let the voices win. That's the Bipolar talking and that is one nasty bitch. If it was up to it you'd be dead thinking that you spared your family a burden. When in actuality you would be breaking them.
So stay strong little Audrey, you are destined for great things and no sadness is permanent, no misery worth the power you give it. We are all in this together.
All our love,