Amongst all pains, the pain of betrayal is the most excruciating of all.
People are conditioned to fill up the emptiness of their current with either dreams of the future or memories of the past, and betrayal takes away just that, the hope of togetherness in future and more painfully the ability to extract happiness from the memories of the past.
-DRISHTI BABLANI
Personally, I relate this so much to psychological and emotional abuse in a relationship.
Situations where your partner in your relationship / experience / situationship, etc goes back and forth between being good and bad. The sudden act of withdrawal of affection and emotions, from avoiding you just suddenly to starting to give you attention suddenly too, to not showing compassion or empathy when you plead or cry, all this have been so abusive.
It is scary to be in a position where you wouldn't know what to expect from a person because they keep changing. What mood they will be in today, will it be a good day, will they be nice today, will they reply on time, will they call back, will they be rude, what choice or words will they have today and so on.
To me, lack of empathy in this way is abuse.
It is absolutely an individual's choice about how they use their time and attention, but exploiting someone and depriving them because it doesn't affect you, is abuse especially when they've become vulnerable due to your actions.
I look forward to a future where we speak more and more about this and we find ways to hold people accountable for their actions because we don't really see this as abuse as much as we need to.
#traumabonding #narcissism #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #Codependency
A few weeks ago my fiancé gave me a letter. She had been kind of off and said something has been weighing in her.
In the letter to spoke about my dog. She stated that when we move to the condo next year (my dog, piper) is not welcome. I’ve had Piper for going in 6 years. Her reasoning is because she doesn’t want a dog living in a condo because it’s too small. Yet it’s bigger than our current suite?
My fiancé and I have been together 7.5 years. We moved in together a couple years ago (as she was going to school and living at home). She never once voiced how she didn’t want to live with a dog. Fast forward to now. We’ve all lived together for over 2 years. Her, myself, my dog and her cat.
Yet suddenly its not even a topic of discussion it was an ultimatum.
The kicker she’s known she has felt this way forever; keeping it from me. Piper is my heart and soul. That dog literally saves me from myself everyday. She not just a dog. She my best friend. My companion. And she just uhhhh just wants me to rehome her to my brother for a few years. Then we can get her “back”
The icing: we just resigned another lease at the beginning of September 👏🏻 #manipulation #depressed #traumabonding #myheartsbreaking
Recently I decided to cut ties with my #Narcissticfather and my #Enablermother . As hard as this decision was, I know in my heart it is what is personally best for me and my children.
It has been a week since I made this decision, and at first i was very empowered and determined. I felt a weight lift as I came to peace with what I've chosen to do. Now I'm having second thoughts. I'm constantly anxious, fidgety. Similar to someone going through rehab, I feel myself craving my drug of choice which would be my parents in this case. I keep feeling deep urges to contact them, to apologize and take blame. I feel like I need to fix everything, even though I know for a fact that is not the healthy option.
It is not only a mental feeling but a physical one. I shake, lose my appetite when I think of my parents because I'm reaped with guilt, and I hardly ever sleep now. Is this a withdrawal process from all the #traumabonding formed over my childhood? I want to know there is a logical reason behind my feelings and that I'm not just going insane.
Follow @yourinnersherlock on Instagram for original writing on narcissistic abuse, narcissism, selfcare and healing. I aim to spread awareness on narcissism as much as possible and help others heal from abuse.
#NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #Healing #Abuse #AbuseSurvivors #DomesticAbuse #EmotionalAbuse #narcissist #Trauma #traumabonding #Awareness #Recovery #Narcissiticabuse #writer #shareyourstory #narcissism
I have trauma bonds. They make me feel like I have to stay in relationships that are unhealthy. They make me feel I have to prove myself or that I care even though the relationship has proven sick. Even though I have ended a relationship, it never.fucking.ends. Because it’s my fault. And I have to make it better. I have to prove something. It becomes more sick. I get more sick. And once where I was an advocate for myself I now become the sickest and become resentful, manipulative, dramatic. What do I do???
#CPTSDinrelationships #CPTSD #traumabonding #HelpMePlease #hatingmyself #RuiningEverything
rock bottoms teach us lessons that mountains never will #TraumaticBrainDisorder #MentalHealthAwareness ##traumabonding #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #Speakyourtruth
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