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Reaching out.

I'm going through a extremely tough time with my mental health at the moment. I've often had passive #SuicidalThoughts linked to my #Fibromyalgia & #ChronicPain but now I've began to struggle with #SuicidalIdeation too. I'm looking to vent, for some guidance, & support from mighty members with experiences of coping with & learning how to overcome this. #advicewanted

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This is a message I received from my roommates, I feel rather hurt by it but I'm unsure how to respond. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

I've replaced my roommates names and left mine and my friend who was involved.

"I’m saying this here because we don’t want any kind of adverse reaction, and because we’re hoping that being with Pierce will help keep you calm if any of this upsets you.

Look, we aren’t trying to constantly rag on you for stuff. But when you say you’re going to do stuff, we just ask that you try a little harder. Today, for example- you said you’d do a little cleaning and then hang out with Pierce. He came over around 3pm; you could have asked him to help for 20 minutes so confrontations don’t occur.
The simplest way to put (roomate 1) and I’s recent feelings toward you is this: we miss the old Chelsey. The Chelsey I asked to be my bridesmaid. The fun and goofy Chelsey that would randomly start cleaning something while singing and dancing. We get that you have mental health issues; but, and I’m going to be honest, I have never met anyone who relies on their issues as much as you do as (what really feels like) an excuse to not do stuff.
(Roomate1) and I have mental health issues too. He has anger control problems, PTSD, emotional dissociation, social claustrophobia/anxiety, in addition to all his physical problems like Crohn’s, high blood pressure, etc
I have generalized anxiety and major depressive disorder, PTSD, major trust issues and abandonment issues, as well as suicidal ideations. But do you see us ever really say that we can’t do something that NEEDS to be done because of any of that stuff? No. We do what we have to do. We don’t rely on any of our mental health issues to put us down or make us incapable of doing something because that’s a surefire way to fail.
Life is a bitch, Chelsey. You can’t always expect stuff to be handed to you on a silver platter, because (again, honesty) that’s exactly how you act most days.
We still like you, we still want you to live with us, and we still want you in the wedding. But we want the old Chelsey back, because we feel like we can’t help you grow or improve yourself with the way things have been recently. We want you to succeed in life."

This was sent after I had spent most of the day on the couch and then playing scrabble with pierce. I have had multiple panic attacks in the last week and between my #ChronicFatigue and #Anxiety once I sat down and rested I came to the conclusion that that is what my body and mind needed. I had mentioned to roomate 2 when she asked that my plan for the day was maybe a little cleaning, cleaning the litter boxes, and then playing scrabble. I did not get any cleaning done, nor clean the litter boxes.

#advicewanted #FamilyAndFriends #ImposterSyndrome #hurtandangry #Depression

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Yoga mat?

Hello all! I am new to this group as well as to POTS and I was wondering if anyone uses a yoga mat to carry around with you in case you need to lie down. I saw something about this on a POTS fb group and I though it was a great idea so I was wondering if anyone could give a recamendation for a specific mat if you do use one! Thanks for reading! #POTS #Potsie #advicewanted

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Where I am right now #CheckInWithMe

I had a lumbar puncture Friday, and while it was a temporary bandaid, my headaches are getting worse again. My blurring vision has started up again, but I have an appointment with my neuro-ophthalmologist tomorrow, so hopefully that goes well. I also don’t want to jinx it, but I’ve finally got a neurologist appointment next Tuesday with a doctor who treats IIH. We’ve been waiting since March, and I’m very grateful it’s happening.

I think I just feel so lost, and like my treatment plan is so up in the air and wishy-washy that I’m just existing. Everything just takes time, and I hate waiting. I think I could use some words of encouragement, if anyone’s got some to spare.

#CheckInWithMe #wordsofwisdom #encouragement #encouragementiswelcome #IIH #iihwarrior #IH #survivingnotthriving #IdiopathicIntracranialHypertension #IntracranialHypertension #checkin #AdviceWelcome #advicewanted

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After some advice

A couple of weeks ago I restarted trampolining after 15 months off due to covid. The sessions have been FANTASTIC and I am so happy to be back. Unfortunately I believe its having a knock on effect on me and I don't quite know what to do.

I have non-radiographic axial spondyloarthritis, a form of inflammatory arthritis that predominantly affects my spine. I believe trampolining is causing an increase in pain in the days after which is manageable. The bigger problem is my sleep. I feel amazing after training and am buzzing. I get a lot done in the afternoon afterwards because I have energy. (Tramps is 12-2pm on Saturdays). Sundays I've been sleeping in because I've crashed and then having a chilled out day. I then go to bed a little late at 10pm ish (9pm is ideal for work). Monday morning I'm a bit tired but get up OK and have energy like normal. After lunch I get sleepy but push through. Then as soon as work finishes I CRASH. I crash and sleep, like full deep should-be-the-middle-of-the-night sleep. Waking up is hard. Then of course I'm wide awake and buzzing again and can't sleep at night (cue posting this at 1am). Last week this continued for several days. If I try to stay awake in the evening I am a total zombie and can't cook dinner or do anything. It feels like my body clock shifts forwards by a few hours.

Has anyone else experienced this type of reaction to exercise? Did it get better with time? Any tips on managing it?

I'm going to try a lunchtime nap tomorrow to see if that can help reset my sleep schedule. It's sometimes difficult to fit in though as I have a lot of meetings atm, and a 10 or 30 min nap just isn't enough. I need at least 1hr30 to get a full sleep cycle in. I did that last week when I eventually fit it in on Thursday and it helped. It's not a sustainable option long term though :/

#ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #axialSpondyloarthritis #Arthritis #Fatigue #Sleep #sleepproblems #Advice #Adviceplease #advicewanted #Exercise #AnkylosingSpondylitis

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can someone help with my obsessive thoughts?

my mom has been struggling enough with our family of 7 people, 3 dogs, 4 cats, and birds. she’s trying so hard to help me but due to the pandemic she’s been having a hard time finding me a therapist. so anyway here goes. i need to come to people who understand ocd and not just my friends. lately, i’ve been having severe ocd over art. i obsess and i obsess constantly over “what am i gonna draw next?” and i absolutely have to have every detail about what i’m gonna draw next perfect or i stress about it. i lose sleep and i can’t eat or focus anymore because my brain is so focused on art. help. #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #GettingHelp #advicewanted #help

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#Advice #Friendship #Anxiety #SocialMedia #SocialAnxiety

So.... this girl I used to be friends with (we were still friends when I got her a job at my work) long story short she was EXTREMELY rude to me and would literally try to start arguments with me AT WORK about topics that were 1- not work related and 2- none of her business.for example she would very loudly make verbal judgements in front of other coworkers about my mental illness which is something I have tried to avoid advertising at work... I got really sick of how she was treating me not just as a “friend” but as a coworker and so now we no longer speak. She will pass me in the hallway and won’t say a word. This has gone in for a few months now and we haven’t spoken at all. Anyway she just sent me an “event invite” on Facebook for one of our mutual friends birthday parties.... I’m still friends with the girl that the birthday party is for but the girl I work with/am not longer friends with is the one hosting the party.... so.... I’m not really sure what to do.... do I go? Do I not go? Like.... she makes it’s VERY obvious that she avoids me at work, which is super immature and unprofessional 🙄 . I try to be as civil and professional as I can and not cause conflict it she won’t even return an email about work related things. Like.... you can be professional and polite and not like someone or be their friend.... I separated business and pleasure and I really messed up when I gave her resume to my boss 😑🤦🏼‍♀️ never again. ANYWAY.... what do I do?????? Go to the party ? Not go to the party ? So I just not respond to the invite for a few days? - #advicewanted #WritingThroughIt

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Walking the fine line of, reality, psychosis, self harm if I can’t stop the pain and negative thoughts of how suicide is 100% better for world #advicewanted #helpme #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

Unintentionally sent my family running away - please come back - how can you leave me without trying to help me or even understand me- abandoned by all

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How do you cope

I’ve recently lost a friend because of sometbig I did and I don’t think either of us handled the situation well but it triggered my Bpd and depression and I have to keep seeing her at school and I can’t talk to anyone else and I’ve started eating lunch in the toilets and only coming out of the cubicles for classes and I feel totally stuck in a depressive rut. I don’t want her back but I don’t want new friends either becuase I don’t like anyone at my school. Any advice #CheckInWithMe #advicewanted #Depression #Anxiety #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

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I just want the sufferings to stop. Advice about it?

Sometimes I feel like I don't fit this world and I'm really far from myself, from "what" is truly important to be happy.
I don't know what this "what" is, but I feel like I could get it, If only I gave myself the chance to try, without following others' ideas and just chasing my inner and most autentic dreams.

Sometimes I just would like to not exist, to end my sufferings.
In those moments, if someone gave me the chance to end all of this in the fastest and less hurtful way, I would accept without regrets.

Anyone has a piece of advice for a hurtful soul who just want to be okay?
Can we manage to live a happily and worthy life?

#SuicidalThoughts #Depression #advicewanted