I guess this is Bipolar depression. I can't do anything but sleep, eat (alot) and go to the bathroom since November 3rd. This is awful. I have been disconnected from everyone but my wife. She is supporting me while I have waited almost a year for SSDI to come in. My lawyer since I have a paper file and that is what is taking so long. Anyway, I am actually rambling. The first time in over 2 months. However, I am not moving my mouth. I have gained 22 lbs. from eating, Christmas and my Birthday were awful and I had the flu even though I had the shot, now my wife has it. I have been in this downward spiral since I stopped geodon. I am now on lamictal and abilify. Not working. I changed psychiatrists and have done Genesight. I get the results back on Thursday the 9th of January. I just don't want to talk or do anything at all. I have not looked at this site in 2 months. I have gotten off of fb. I have stopped my dieting. I can't pay my Bill's let alone my medical Bill's. I have cirrhosis so my doctor wants me to lose weight. It is hard to lose weight because of the bipolar depression, poly cystic ovary syndrome, and all the other MIs compounding it. I am also wondering if I have other Illnesses other than what I am diagnosed with. I am diagnosed with PTSD, GAD, OCD, and bipolar I with psychosis. I wonder if I have histrionic or some other personality disorder. I have been very confident in my diagnoses as I have worked for 12 years until Match if 2019 as a Certified peer specialist helping others with mental illness in a crisis stabilization unit. I got to the point were at home I was triggered all the time with my ex boyfriend that I had 28 years ago, guns going off during hunting season, tv and movies, all sorts of stuff. I became numb as fuck after blowing up and crying due to these triggers. I am obsessed off and on with my ex. I have been with my wife for 27 years and married to her for 4. i know I have produced alot from my mind but all this is going through my head even though I feel numb as fuck on the outside. What do I need to do? Help