unworthy

I dont know whats wrong with me but I always feel so unworthy of anyone loving me I feel noone truly loves me not even my mom I feel nooones feels there life us a Lil bit better cause im part of it im so afraid of losing the people I love yet I feel noone is afraid of losing me .. I posted a post on FB the other day and my mom commented on it just saying I love you..and I burst into tears like it really touched me lime I thought aw she really does love me maybe ..like who gets that emotional over a post that there mom post saying I love you idk I feel I dont deserve my mom at times even tho she is the cause of a lot of my depression and anxiety I still feel I dont deserve her like. Not good enough I feel that way about everyone in my life down to my youngest son I distance myself from him cauwe I feel I dont deserve him that hes just gonna grow up and leave me like my other 2 grown kids did I k ow its wrong but I dont know how to feel otherwise I hate feeling unworthy and not good enough I sabatoge most of my relationships and end up alone cause i feel I dont deserve them ..Anyone know what im talking about??
#Depression #unworthy #BPD # anxiety#MoodDisorders #PanicDisorder

I've attempted suicide 3 times in 3 months. The thoughts keep flooding my mind. Hot tears flow down my cheeks. Instead of making yet another attempt, I reached out 2 The National Suicide Hotline but they were busy with someone having an actual emergency and referred me 2 The National Domestic Abuse Hotline. They gave me resources 4 counseling. So where does that leave me at this hour? #abused #SuicidalIdeation #unworthy #alone

I've lived with a severe back injury since 2003. It has only gotten worse over the years and multiple (8) failed surgeries. My anxiety has gotten much worse over past 3 years as well. No one seems to care or understand how this affects my personality? I've been alone for many years, I find other people intimidating. I stopped dating 10 years ago, choosing to be alone because I feel that I'm not good enough or worthy of being loved. If it wasn't for my 28 year old son, who lives with me, I'd not speak to others for weeks. I've become so accustomed to laying propped up in the bed watching tv all alone, so much that I no longer miss having companionship. My son is verbally abusive but I allow it because I feel like I deserve no better. I can't imagine living without him?

#Disability #celebate #alone #Insecure #unworthy

Its been more than a year and I can't find a job, I've been studying further to improve my chances but nothing. I feel so guilty for leaving my job where I was unhappy. Guilty for not being able to look after myself. Makes me feel useless and I'm just a burden to anyone. I'm not worthy of getting love.

Not getting a job makes it worse.

Then in the other side I'm so scared of getting a new job, scared I won't be good enough and get fired. Scared that I won't be able to cope again.

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #unemployed
#Guilt
#unworthy #JobSearch
#NotGoodEnough

I seem to have a hair trigger to how things are worded and get offended very easily. I am so hypersensitive to words I perceive to be patronizing, disrespectful and hurtful. It happened again this morning in another post.

Then on the other hand I am so tired of feeling like I have to always explain and justify that I do have such real authentic hurt feelings to which I'm constantly being judged, critisized and challenged for. The toxicity in my family really shaped, conditioned, and predisposed me to this.

Recently everytime I feel pushed to defend my feelings, perception of a situation I get so twisted up in side I start second guessing/questioning my reactions and get into what seems like an unending loop in my head. Then I start thinking back to the distorted thoughts of how there must be something fundamentally wrong with me. I'm so tired that no matter how much therapy I've done I can't seem to get control of this so that does not twist me up so much all the time. At times it feels like I'm in this state 24/7.

Am I ever going to get a handle on words/situations that trigger me and make me constantly question my sanity? #unworthy #confused #lowselfesteem #Depression #Anxiety

Hey, everyone. I'm a bisexual woman in a same-sex relationship. I've been dealing with ROCD since me and my girlfriend started dating. At first I thought it could be a lack of chemistry or affection, but then I realized it simply couldn't be normal that anyone suffered that much with intrusive thoughts and guilt. It was clear I didn't want to end the relationship, but those "what if" questions wouldn't leave me alone.

Well, we've been together for 1 year and 8 months, and she's pretty much everything I've always wanted. Still, almost everyday I find a new reason to feel guilty, ashamed or unworthy, usually thoughts. Last weekend I threw my birthday party, which is something that makes me very excited. In these occasions, I like to dance, to sing, to be silly, and I won't deny I love being the center of attention. My gf is the complete opposite: she's shy, calm, not very talkative and gets jealous of me very easily (and here I have to say, so do I). On my party, I danced like crazy, and I obviously felt some eyes on me, especially from men. It made me feel hot, beautiful, and made me wanna dance even more, while my girlfriend was there on the corner and not even trying to participate. When it was over, I felt like shit. Like I had betrayed her, like I was a bad person for liking that attention I got. I didn't do anything disrespectful or explicit, I almost didn't interact with those men tbh, and still I felt like I had done something very wrong. She didn't start a fight, but when I tried to address the subject, it felt like it wasn't enough. Like I needed to be punished for those actions. She's kinda upset, it's very clear, but I guess she's trying to be supportive of my ROCD difficulties, and that's why she didn't react poorly.

Sorry for the huge text, but the point is: do I have any reason to feel ashamed or guilty? Is this ROCD trying to make me believe I don't deserve the relationship I have, trying to make me question everything over and over? Am I trying to achieve a level of perfection that no human being could possibly have?

Thank you all.

#ROCD #Guilty #unworthy #anxious

I don’t deserve to be a lesbian, I’m too fat and ugly. I never deserve to have another girlfriend ever again because who the hell would want me?! I only came to terms with my sexuality 3yrs ago aged 29, partly due to child sex abuse, and this makes me feel less deserving of it. I just want to die, I can’t really be my true self. #LGBT #Lesbian #unworthy #Sexuality #Sexabuse #ChildAbuse