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Anyone else feel this way? Looking for advice.

Hi there! I am moving into my first apartment with my boyfriend in a couple of weeks and I am so anxious. The thought of moving out of my childhood home and parents just feels so depressing…I am both excited and anxious. #Advice #Anxiety #moving #Leavingchildhoodhome #scared #change #differentroutine

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5 reactions 1 comment
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What am I going to do…? New apartment situation | TW parents, kids, mentions of being threatened from past hotel experience, emotional abuse trauma

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So I’ve finally moved in with my dad to get away from the traumatic experiences from living with my mom, and my sister and my sister’s kids who have moved out already.

One of the reasons I wanted to move out is to get away from the noise my nephews (especially the youngest one) were making which drove me crazy and get very overstimulated often… but here, we live on the first floor and for a while we’ve noticed that our walls suck. And guess what, a kid’s up there, too. Our neighbors upstairs noise is super noticeable, we can hear their footsteps good enough, even in the mornings. It doesn’t matter where we are in the apartment, we can still hear everything pretty well. And it’s annoying, especially when I’m still trying to sleep or even when going to sleep at times. And in the mornings, they’re one of the causes for negative thoughts, whether that’s in general or about my past, and I’m already ticked off for the morning.

I know that this is only temporary and are planning to move into a house next year, but this sucks. We never asked for this. I can’t go back to where I used to be and I refuse, I’m done with dealing with my mom’s overcompensation and just remembering that was where the continuation of emotional and some verbal trauma took place since 2014. I’m also terrified of hotels now because I had a misunderstanding on when to leave and a security guard threatened to call the police on me if I didn’t make it out in time, leaving me in tears and so much anger and felt like this city hated neurodivergent individuals or something!!

I tried noise canceling headphones, I’m trying earplugs (even really good ones!), I tried my white machine, but I’m still too sensitive to the noise and it still leaves me with negative thoughts in the mornings sometimes. And I was hoping to move into a place where I didn’t had to do that anymore!!

My dad said that he’ll try talking to the neighbors upstairs again, but I honestly don’t think there’s much that can be done, and I feel like I’m always talking to him about this every weekend. What if the neighbors upstairs just don’t care? And especially since summer break will be coming up for them, I’m scared… not to mention that I hate summer because of the freaking bugs that tend to overstimulate me as well if I’m outside for too long.

Is asking for peace and quiet so much to ask for?? It’s bringing me in tears.. /rhetorical question

#MyAutismIsNotADisorder #MyAutismIsNotADisability #Anxiety #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #Trauma #emotionaltrauma #overstimulation #overstimulated #apartment #moving #OSTD

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Told my mom about moving in with my dad...it didn't go well | TW parents, guilt-tripping, gaslighting, swearing, one all cap text, suicide ideation

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I've finally told my mom that after considering, I plan to move with my dad, and said that it had nothing against her. She was offended, she even said it, too. Continuously guilt-tripping me with words like "I do everything I can for you, and yet you still chose him over me."

I told her to stop guilt-tripping me and told her numerous times that it had nothing against her. She acted like she wasn't offended and understood my decision, but as someone with autism and whose mother has been mentally abusive for most of my life, I knew she was deep down. She denied that she was guilt-tripping, and has even accused me of guilt-tripping her when I said out loud that I then wanted to kill myself (out of stress, disbelief, and not wanting to deal with the pain anymore). Not to mention that I was just looking for ways to kill myself three days ago because of this stupid society. She even said something like "how can you get mad at me when everyone else in the world does that" when I mentioned that she used to fat-shame me, shame me for not taking showers at times and compared me to others, etc... she even denied that she even MOCKED me because she thought that I was offended, when really I couldn't hear her the first time, and I told her that, too!!

I don't fucking care if she started to talk in a more understanding matter and was no longer offended and acts like she actually cares about me (like she does every fucking time we have start an argument), I'm not forgiving her for saying those things. At this point, she doesn't deserve it. One of my queerplatonic partners (not friends, but not romantic) is now pissed.. well, every one of my partners are now pissed at her at this point, and are very glad that I chose to move in with my dad instead of staying with her. She has never changed when it comes to my dad. I'm honestly very disappointed that she even acted that way. I'm fucking 21 years old, a fucking adult who can make their own fucking decisions, and yet she still hasn't changed. 😞😡

I already don't like my (older) sister very much, either, because I always feel like she gaslights me whenever we get into conflict as well.

#MyAutismIsNotADisorder #Anxiety #Family #FamilyAndFriends #GuiltTrip #SocialAnxiety #moving #SocialAnxietyDisorder #Disappointed #MentalHealth #WOW #Parent #Parents #mentalabuse #Abuse #Siblings #Gaslighting

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I feel emotional tonight,

I wonder if it's cuz #Winter is coming back around. OR if im stressing if the house will sell. I'M praying it will. My prayers haven't been answered yet Have to have a positive mind set #TheMighty #MentalHealth #MightyTogether #Depression #Anxiety #moving #LearningDisabilities #sad

11 reactions 3 comments
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Relocation

As I wrap up my 50th rotation around the planet, I find myself living in my Mum and Dad's spare room, crammed with the few remnants of my former existence that I was able to bring with me.

A decade in Calgary, AB ended with 6 months of unemployment and the concomitant worsening of my mental health struggles. I had support, thank goodness. I had people who made sure that my situation didn't get any worse. And, right close to the end of my time there, I met someone who made me think that the sad times might not actually last.

But now I'm relocated, 3000+ kilometers away from everything that has defined me and that I have defined for myself for 20% of my existence. Back in Ontario, where everything is really, really green and humid, and I am completely freaked out by the density of population. I grew up here, spent a good 25 years of my life in Southern Ontario. My family is here, my dearest of friends too. Ostensibly, this is home, though I wrestle with that term.

It's an odd thing to feel like you've relocated but at the same time feel completely untethered from anything and everything. This move, these 6 months, are vital to my recuperation, transformation. And perhaps finding it a very strange return, climate, landscape, people, etc., will help in this recuperation. But it's weird and uncomfortable and unfamiliar, and I just want to see the smiles on the faces of the people I love that are so far away.

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #moving #Recovery

7 reactions 1 comment
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Onto A New Chapter of Life

Hello all. I have made the hard decision to separate from my husband of 21 years. Thankfully, I will be able to move in with my 70 year old mother as I am unable to work and am disabled (will soon be applying for SSDI).

Although I will have some help, the many tasks (especially packing) and uncertain future feel overwhelming. That's on top of the emotional rollercoaster I'm going through and having to leave my cats with my husband. With my ME/CFS, the emotional aspect is already exhausting me.

Has anyone else, especially those disabled and/or with ME/CFS, gone through this kind of situation? I'm terrified but know it's the right decision as my home life isn't always safe and negatively affects me emotionally, mentally, and physically. I have waited it out as long as I could.

Any words of wisdom or support would be greatly appreciated. #Separation #Divorce #ChronicFatigue #ChronicFatigueSyndrome #Fibromyalgia #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #Grief #moving

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Hi everyone

We will be moving soon to a rental property. A larger house instead of an apartment. It's a great blessing! My mother is very stressed and unfortunately I can't do much to help #CheckInWithMe #moving
#Newhome

8 comments