anxious

Please tell me there are more people that have experienced this because I feel like I'm getting insane...

I'm anxiously attached, but living a good life with my boyfriend. 6,5 years relationship, dealing with my anxiety and other issues as well, so no great intimate life - but still happy together, buying a house, talking about the future and kids.

Then I got ill. Burnout - but the kind where both anxiety and physical issues were extreme. And later I got also diagnosed with long covid, ánd I got an ADHD diagnosis.

So it was hard, my boyfriend didn't really know how to cope, but I got better and better because I finally found a therapy that helped - until I had a total relapse due to circumstances. And then he lost faith. He was about to turn 30 when he told me he had serious doubts about our future, if I wouldn't relapse when we had kids, it didn't feel like a love relationship anymore.

My body completely spiraled. I asked him through a letter to either stay, find an emotional outlet, and be a team - or go, because the inbetween made my body feel like it was in mortal danger. He said he stayed.

But his words didn't match his actions. I became hypervigilant, which means completely focused on his mood, and in the meantime he got more depleted, more stressed, more injuries, sick more often, and didn't feel like doing stuff anymore. His words said yes but his body said no and without wanting it, my whole focus shifted from "wanting to get better" to "wanting to get better to not lose him". It was the only thing that drove me, literally. I tried everything I could to learn how to feel safe within myself but my nervous system refused.

And then 8 weeks ago he broke up with me. And I've never felt this awful. Dreadful. Terrified. Unsafe. Overwhelmed. With nothing to live for, because the only thing I lived for - our future together - is gone.

I don't know how to cope. I've learned so much in therapy but I'm só low that I cannot apply anything. After 8 weeks I still feel like I'm dying. Please tell me I'm not the only one dealing with something similar - and please tell me that it actually gets better.

Because I'm exhausted. I fought for my health, my mental state and my relationship every single day for 2,5 years. And it got me rock bottom.

#RockBottom #breakup #Hypervigilance #Anxiety #anxious #relationship #ChronicIllness #longcovid #Burnout #ADHD #illness #Burnout #lowselfesteem

My mom disapproves of my partner. My partner and I's relationship started as a sexual one. Whenever there is a hiccup or an argument between I open up to her about it and she tells me her point of view about the situation. Yes, I know the things I've opened up to my mom about our relationship are not okay and I apologized to him for everything. My mom is very protective of me, she does not want to see me get hurt, which I do get. She was very nice and welcoming to him, but when I told her about our relationship and the things that he was doing to hurt me her perspective of him changed drastically. She thinks that he is using me for sex and that he is not being intentional with what he wants. When I asked him if he was using me for sex, he said no, it's not about the sex. So, now, I don't know how to fix the problem between the two of them. I mean I love my mom so much and I don't want our relationship as mother and daughter to end, but then I love my partner, even though we may not be right for each other. I've asked him so many times if he would want me to talk to my mom and tell her how I feel about him, and he would say, no, it's okay you don't have to, I don't want you guys to have any confrontation, so I just left it alone. So, idk what else to do and I don't want him to feel that I am stringing him along, because I'm not. I told him time and time again if he feels the need that he can't take it anymore he is obligated to leave, I'm not going to hold him back from finding his happiness. Recently, we had a conversation and he said to me he wants us to be in a relationship, I had to pause for a minute to reflect and think about whether I am going into this relationship because of the desperation of wanting to be in love, or if I am going into this relationship with pure intentions and I do sometimes be thinking the same questions for him as well, because when I saw his message saying, “Let's start planning life and sex.”Immediately in my mind, I wanted to say, “I know that we both love each other and want to plan/build a life together, but I don’t want to hop into a relationship blindly because of the sexual chemistry we have. I want a relationship that is genuine and pure.” I never told him this, but it was something I wanted to write down to eventually tell it to him. While I took a step back and analyzed everything that had been going on, one thought came to mind, and it was that one night when we were on FaceTime with each other. It was a couple of weeks after when we had lost our precious angel. We were on the phone talking, he wanted to go downstairs for something, I was still on the phone with him, he sat down at the dining table with his big brother, they were talking about something, then one thing led to another, he asked me how far along was I in the pregnancy, I told him I was 5 weeks and 2 days pregnant, he turned to his brother and said, “Man, she’ll be looking after that baby by her dam self.” I said to myself, wow, did he just say that? And on top of that was laughing about it too. So, I played it off as if I didn’t hear what he just said, I didn’t bring it up to him because I didn’t want any confrontation with him. I was like you think you’re funny, saying that and laughing about it. You don’t understand the trauma, heartbreak, and pain I’ve been through. I don’t know how I should feel about this, to be honest.

I hope this doesn’t come off as rude or anything writing this, I’m very sorry if this does, I’ll delete it if it does. I posted feedback to the app support about changing the tag/group from Autism Spectrum Disorder to just Autism as there are plenty of autistic individuals, including I, who feel uncomfortable with “disorder” or even worse “disability”. I don’t even use the popular Autism tag because of this. It’s been a week and no response, and I can’t help but get very anxious and worry that I’ll never get a response… I know it’s likely because they’re just busy, but my anxiety won’t shut up about this…

Edit: …You know what, I’m probably going to delete this post eventually, this feels so silly (in a bad way).

#Anxiety #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #MyAutismIsNotADisorder #MyAutismIsNotADisability #anxious

Been struggling with it for about a month now and it really sucks :( #OCD #Anxiety #MentalHealth #sucks #cantstop #Awareness #Breathing #MentalHealth #obsessive #horrible #sad #lonely #depressed #anxious #New #newhere #TheMighty #moghtytogether

I don’t have OCD personally but I have Anxiety GAD and I came across this while trying to find why I’m super anxious than normal and obsessed with my breath. I will feel so dump and weak like I can’t control it and it’s taking over my day and making me feel miserable like I can’t take a deep breath in and then I panic and it cycles and I’m constantly monitoring my breath where it doesn’t go automatic like it should :( please help sometimes even after meditation or deep breathing I still don’t feel good. #Anxiety #OCD #help #panic #AnxietyAttacks #PanicAttacks #anxious #sad #Upset #miserable #frustrated #dumb

Any tips :) for when you struggle with mental health and life outlook. #mentality  #posotivity #Happiness #MentalHealth #question #anxious #depressed

I have zero reason for my period not to come. Unless it's just late this month. Well i have been stressed and Overwhelmed with moving and all that #anxious #Anxiety feelings. Just hope there isn't another reason.#MentalHealth #Depression I have been feeling the #winterblues very strong this year to.

Hi I need help. I can't sleep it's 5 AM and I work today. I'm feeling #depressed #anxious and #stressed