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I can’t do it anymore

I’m so unbelievably tired of forcing my way through this decades long depression. There is no way out. I just want this to end. I’m sitting here crying to my dogs. I have a therapist and a psych doc. I’m on meds.

I can’t do this any longer. What do I do and who can I talk to?

It’s been 30 years and I’m never going to get better. #Depression #End of my rope #I can’t stand this anymore

83 reactions 34 comments
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Anger Problems

I get very angry because I am frustrated at my own decisions. I beat myself up about the friends I kept and how they took advantage of me. I don't know why I am so angry when my mum is just trying to help. I think it's more to do with the fact I don't want these problems and I should never have to deal with them in the first place.

I kept bad company in my late teens and was getting into a lot of trouble. I need to remind myself that none of the decisions I made are my mothers fault - I need to start taking ownership of my own life. I was involved with the wrong crowd and I have to accept that nothing positive comes from that type of existence. I know it is difficult to come to terms with and I am deeply sorry for my decisions.

I want to stop getting angry at my mother and stop blaming her for all the negative events that were inevitably going to occur. I was not cut out for that life and my parents were trying to warn me before anything happened to me. Luckily I managed to survive without any major life changing events but I am left with the mental trauma that I am not equipped to deal with.

I need to stop getting angry and start living life on my terms. My time on this planet is not perfect and the decisions I make merely reflect an imperfect life.

#PTSD #anger #Depression #Sadness #Drugs #Addiction #Guilt #Friends #association #nobody #empty #assualt #Trauma #Pain #hurt #betrayal #lies #Truth #hate #End #time #Life #Happiness #dreams #Love #Positivity #Support #Love #Rage #control

10 reactions 3 comments
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Explanation SB 1338 Care Act in Calif.

CARE Act, which would authorize specified people to petition a civil court to create a CARE plan and implement services, to be provided by county behavioral health agencies, to provide behavioral health care, stabilization medication, and housing support to adults who are suffering from schizophrenia spectrum and psychotic disorders and who lack medical decisionmaking capacity. Rather than involuntary psych ward, conservatorship, and/or prison. #End stigma #MentalHealth

6 comments
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#End of friendships

I had 2 friends that were like family for over 20 years, until a year ago when our friendship ended. It still hurts but it’s also a little frightening to be alone, not lonley but the alone where if the car breaks down you’re stuck. I have to remind myself that there is always help available. I can call a tow, get an Uber, call a help line. No one is ever truly alone. It may not be the help you would have wanted like from family or friends but there is help for what you need..…Is still sucks.

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#End of your arm

the next drink or drug is at the end of your arm I had 20 years plus clean I went out on a pain pill I figured that was less harm than doing something stupid

1 comment
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I'm tired of the nighmare

I feel I can keep fighting. I've been with low mood, sadness, anger against me for years and now I can only think in how bad my past was, all what I have lost and that I can't feel anything good. Although I know there are a lot of good things, I can't have any positive emotion or feeling. I can do anything. Everything scares me or it is too hard like I live in a nightmare. I don't really know what to do and I can find any hope even in my psychologist. I wish I was dead.
#negativity #pessimism #Dead #End #help