Lettinggo

I want to highlight the importance of learning the lesson and letting go. I shared this awhile back in the newsletter for 1AND1, a mental health and wellness platform dedicated to making you 1% better daily. And it's a message I'm still thinking about that I'd like to share with you all.

I’m an imperfect human attempting to be perfect. I know it’s not possible, but sometimes, I still get caught up in the cycle of doing everything perfectly and obsessing over doing the right thing. I’ve struggled with this in all areas of my life: work, personal growth, relationships, and more. Although I try to get a lot right, I still make many mistakes and mess up quite a bit. I stumble, get back up, and fall again numerous times. I often overthink about making decisions, only to make the wrong one, and will ruminate on those actions and how I could’ve done better. And all that overthinking and self-criticism have affected my mental health and anxiety.

I spoke to my therapist about this, and one note she told me that was so powerful yet so simple was, "You're not in trouble. You’re only human. You’re doing your best.” That really stuck with me, and she reminded me that mistakes happen and that nobody will ever b##e perfect, no matter how hard we try. She encouraged me to look at these moments as lessons for what not to do again and how to break specific patterns. She also encouraged me to take actionable steps once I’ve become aware of something I need to change about myself instead of wallowing in what happened or engaging in self-deprecation. There’s power in knowing more about myself, and there’s also even more power in knowing what to do to change those things to be a better person for myself and others around me.

If you’re struggling with learning the lesson and letting go, I want to encourage you to take a deep breath. These moments will only teach you and make you grow. This is a part of life. Use these lessons as reflection and embrace change and improvement for what’s to come. There’s so much in store for you, and you have to be ready to receive it, and you can’t do that if you’re focusing on the past. Give yourself the chance to experience more and not be held hostage about what you could’ve done. Those mistakes only need to be a place of reference, not residence.

#1and1 #1and1newsletter #MentalHealth #Lettinggo #acceptingmore

I have a intrusive thoughts which infect my mind and make it difficult to concentrate. They start the minute I wake up and do not cease until I go back to sleep. I have many hobbies and try to keep my mind occupied but the evil thoughts replay over and over.

When I was physically assaulted over ten years ago I never thought that I would continue to experience flashbacks and trauma from the incident. I have been in fights before and thought it would become another distant memory of something unfortunate. My experience has been completely different and I am stuck in a never ending loop of sorrow and pity.

The attack causes me major mental health issues that I can't move on from. I am stuck in a negative cycle of pain and suffering. The image of the attack repeats in my mind. I see the faceless images of multiple attackers and the fear of reliving the incident is ever present. I am afraid of what's in store for me as I battle to focus on what's important.

It is difficult to describe the incident as it involves anger, betrayal and resentment. The only thing I know for sure is that it leaves me empty and insecure. These people purposefully sought to hurt me and they were successful.

I hate to say it but my mental health has deteriorated to the point where I am miserable. I hate my life and I am aware of the holes I keep digging are damaging me further. I blame my mother and father for a lot of my problems whether it is their fault or not. They did their best but had unrealistic expectations and when I was unable to achieve the impossible goals they had set for me I spiralled in to a deep depression.

This depression has followed me for years and the more I let it control my life - the more pain it causes me. I have never dealt with any of the negative emotions that fill my mind. I bottled everything up and pretended I was fine. I am at the point where I don't see anything improving and I want to hurt the few people I have left.

I really wish I could end on something positive but my life has become a merry go round of pain, sorrow and regret. I hate myself in more ways than one and I need help but the road to recovery is fraught with feelings of guilt and resentment.

EDIT: I am fully aware that my posts are very much a pity party. I am hurting inside and just desperately want to feel better.

#Depression #Misery #Sadness #hurt #Pain #TheMighty #MightyTogether #MentalHealth #feelings #unhappy #Relationships #Friendship #Love #Trauma #PTSD #challenges #Life #Death #advertisy #friend #peace #Emotion #flasback #Lettinggo #scar #regret #compassion #Thoughts #Mindfulness #Anxiety #reserved #Respect #peace

I have been in a significant decline over the past two or three years. I am constantly depressed and suffer from anxiety. I also have a limited support network and don't have anyone to confide in. I lost all my friends in such a short space of time; looking back on my life it is very difficult to imagine losing everything in less than two years. I was left with nothing but the support of my parents which I am very grateful for.

I had just turned 20 years old and had my whole life in front me. At that young age, I felt like I had already lived a lifetime. It is very difficult to come to terms with what happened and no matter how much I try to forget I am reminded of my past. I feel as though that short period of my life will haunt me forever and I am always chasing my tail trying to make up for it.

This is an exhausting process and leaves me feeling inadequate and empty. I have never really understood why I was so angry with the world. The only way I can describe how I was feeling at the time was trying to climb out of a bottomless pit and only slipping deeper and deeper until I could no longer see the hole I came in through. I also sought external gratification through any means available.

When I finally hit rock bottom and decided I needed to make a change, it was too late. Nobody was there to greet me or offer me a hand like I had expected. Everybody in my life had abandoned me and I was left to pick up the pieces and reflect on the self inflicted trail of destruction which had turned my life upside down. This period of my life was the most difficult but sub-consciously I told myself it would get better.

I re-assured myself that things could only get better. Things did improve but only ever so slightly. I would never be the optimistic confident and popular kid I once was. Instead I was a broken version of myself both internally and externally. My life was shattered and I was left to pick up the pieces.

One regret that I have was not trying to re-connect with old friends, my ego got in the way of putting my self out there as my reputation was tarnished beyond repair. My old friends no longer wanted to associate with me. I think this is what I struggle with the most not being able to let people in due to my fear of getting hurt.

I have always been a sensitive person and my emotions get the better of me. In my early thirties I seek connection and community with others although I feel there is a piece of me missing and I am forever trying to find it to make myself whole again. I still struggle to connect with people on a personal level as I have reservations and fears from my youth. #PTSD #Anxiety #Depression #Sadness #Guilt #TheMighty #MightyTogether #Shame #failure #redemption #Fear #clarity #Love #peace #Friends #relationship #Lettinggo #reuniting

Two months ago, my partner left me for someone else. Our relationship was toxic and he did cheat on me before, but I still had hope that he would change and we could make it work. You see I have anxious attachment style, so I was needy and always felt like he had one foot out of the door. I know I push people away but I thought he would love me through my hard days like I loved him through his. He was the one person that I truly opened up to in a lot of different ways. I was pushing him away but I never wanted him to leave. I was so lost in my pain. He told me that his new relationship is better than ours. He gets along with her and they communicate better. I’m crushed. I feel so unworthy of understanding and love. It’s been two months. I had to block him today because he writes me every once in awhile. I just can’t talk to him anymore. Every time I do, I get depressed. I’ve decided to be single and date myself for once. I want to break the toxic cycle that keeps replaying in my relationships. I just want to be happy, heal, and forgive myself for my past mistakes. I want to like and love myself. I lost myself in that relationship and allowed the pain that I felt to change me into someone that I am not proud of. I feel like I let myself down. #toxicrelationship #Depression #Lettinggo #SeparationAnxiety #brokenheart #sad