disordered eating

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teeth things & funky food problems (ok I couldn't continue my alliteration lol)

so to add to the mix of my anxiety/phobia-ridden life, presently symptomatic in-part as struggling to eat adequately -- ... we add ...!

BITE! BLOCKS! ... or which I call, teef wedges. 🙃 It's like a doorstopper, for teeth! 🙃 I mean I've heard of them before anecdotally, but I didn't think it would apply to me 🙃 1001% unexpected 🙃 how long do they go in for ... I thought it was 1 adjustment but Google said possibly 6-9mo halp 😑🙃

Apparently it's for bite issues? But my ortho said something about how my gaps are not closing equally so it's disproportionate (by now the lowers are 99% closed, uppers less so and I can't see as clearly but I can def still feel the [albeit smol] gap) .. so we put bite blocks! I have two, one on each side.

... help, it's like spacers (but wedged) all over again. Does the I-feel-it-there -ness ever fade? + with night time elastic wear, I definitely feel the elastic pressure on the side where the bite block's pressure also feels stronger.

This means ... yesterday's lunch was 5 chicken nuggets (omg sounds like a kids' meal don't judge but I really didn't even dare to try a burger) + iced matcha latte. Yesterday's dinner was black beans cooked (soft) to Asian-style soup, with rice - yes I note my no-meat-no-veggies life but HOW? I basically give up on fibrous/leafy veg, & chicken/beef is stringy, help. I usually eat prawns with fried rice now. Not cos I like choosing "expensive" options, but because dang teeth.

Skipped breakfast, had lunch with a friend today - had a ham steak/sourdough toast (2slices, what was I thinking) set with 2 eggs. Ate most of it but couldn't quite finish, partly cos I took so long I got full + the food got cold. I left about 3/4 piece of sourdough toast & half a sunnysideup on my plate. Ate the same dinner as yesterday, minus rice. Managed to *somehow* also eat one slice of apple (I'm legit so proud hahahaha) ... in the same time a regular person might have eaten 2. Or 3. But okay 🙃

... help. Might need to start buying canned cream soup again - life as it is; I bought some when I first started my braces journey last year. Left 2 cans unfinished bc I learned to eat proper food with time (😅), realised one can had a dent the other day - threw away - and I just opened the last one over the weekend. So I have no. more. canned. soup 😑

Soup tomorrow, maybe. I need canned tuna that I can make salad with (for toast? 😋) ... no meat/no veg** life, help 🙃

** I do _try_ my best though. Like if my parents cook or buy back stuff that definitely includes some kind of meat/veg, my current refrain is "will try, but not gonna take a 2nd serve/piece .. "

#CheckInWithMe #MentalHealth #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #Selfesteem [?] #DisorderedEating [?]

2 people are talking about this
Community Voices
Community Voices

🙃 don't judge, but - your thoughts? [potential tw: weight, disordered eating?]

So I've been unemployed for abt 4 months now after my company "downsized to management" (using their exact phrase + clarify I wasn't terminated) and as time goes by, I feel an increasing sense of shame abt it.

Anyway, so initially I think I put on some weight, like x pounds. It FREAKED ME OUT bc if you believe in BMI, let's just say as an Asian that amount pushes my BMI into not-great territory hahaha it made my BMI higher than ideal.

As time went by (I swear I wasn't trying intentionally to lose weight, more like "if I'm not even working do I really need food"), I .. felt less deserving of food 🙃 Not to make things too triggering, but some days I'd only have 2 meals, and I'm not proud to say some days it dwindled to 1. 🙃 It just felt like ... I wasn't sure I deserved food heh.

ANYWAY. So as I said, it would take losing x pounds to put me back to regular BMI. Today I stood on the scale after breakfast(! So its not like first thing in the morn kinda) and realised I only have x-4 pounds to gooo. Like ok I'll be fully upfront and say I don't think the 4 pounds were actual proper healthy loss, so there's that.

That and I havent got my period and I'm definitely not preggo so ... 🙃

Idk, should I be concerned. I'm not sure if like, I'm just late or Aunt Flow skipped the month 🤷‍♀️ IDK ok I sound like an awkward teenager in a weird phase and I'm aware how stupid I sound cos I'm twice that age but uhhhh idkkkkk.

Anyone else relates to any of this?!?! & does this sound like an eating disorder 🙃 or am I just a weirdo heh?

#CheckInWithMe #MentalHealth #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #Selfesteem #DisorderedEating [?]

12 people are talking about this
Community Voices
Kai
Community Voices

How do I stop intentionally triggering myself?

I follow this one girl who used to be underweight and I can’t stop looking at old videos of her and comparing myself to her. It makes me feel awful but I just can’t stop. I also look at content about eating disorders that’s triggering even though I know it will hurt me. I just don’t know how to stop myself.
#EatingDisorders #DisorderedEating

Community Voices

How do I stop compulsively watching triggering things?

I can’t stop looking at this one girls videos. I block her then unblock her hours later. It’s almost a habit at this point. It always makes me feel worse, so I don’t get why I can’t just stop. I compare myself to her which is why it’s harmful.
#DisorderedEating

Community Voices

Bariatric Clinic for RA?
#EatingDisorderRecovery

My rheumatologist wants to refer me to the hospital’s bariatric clinic. I have so many concerns. I understand wanting to get weight off my joints, but there are so many things she seems to not be considering. I have #PolycysticOvarySyndrome which makes it really hard for me to loose weight, not for lack of trying. Alongside that, I have a history of #DisorderedEating and I’m terrified of the roadblocks to my recovery this could cause. My experience with the medical field when it comes to balancing my #ChronicIllness and #MentalHealth has been very negative. Am I overreacting? Has anyone else dealt with this?
#RheumatoidArthritis

4 people are talking about this
Community Voices
Mieke

An Introduction

Hi, my name is Mieke! I am new to The Mighty.
At the moment, my health is making it hard to work. I am a hobbyist artist and occasional writer, though! I recently picked up crochet and while I'm not that good at it yet, I find it very relaxing and fun.
I am a survivor of childhood abuse and SA, as well as narcissistic abuse. It was weird, growing up, because my mother was (and still is) very chronically ill.
I have been diagnosed with ADHD, PTSD (I don't remember which, but I think c-PTSD), Anxiety, and Depression. I also have Asthma and Ehler's Danlos Syndrome (Hypermobility). I am in recovery from an undiagnosed eating disorder and still struggle with body dysmorphia.
I joined The Mighty because I don't have many people to talk to and there are some things I may not be ready to talk about with my husband (that I may need help figuring out how to tell him). I want to share my experiences with other people who may be in the same boat as me as well! #TheMighty #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #Asthma #EhlersDanlosSyndrome #DisorderedEating

5 people are talking about this
Community Voices

🙄 Do I have the right to be annoyed, I kind of am 😬

[potential] content warning: disordered eating x body dysmorphia - though this is tangential for context, & not my main point 🙃

My friend and I were listening to a Zoom webinar (omg it started kinda tangentially, I'm telling you) about mental health & part of the discussion was the facilitator talking about body image & body dysmorphic disorder. & she made this offhand comment abt how most people probably had an eating disorder in high school (wow I'm don't even know what to think) - and she mentioned a few things she remembered doing.

So then I'm like, I don't think I ever did although in my early 20s I definitely had some issues with disordered eating (😳😳😳 I'd like to think I'm at least better now in comparison to then, but uh hey)

Then she asks me if it was with the intention to lose weight (obviously not??? It's never about the food .. I swear ...) or for other reasons. & I'm like, no the only time I was legit body-image-concerned was when I was having to take Mirtazapine (IT WAS LEGIT DISTRESSING OK no clothes could fit. It was probably minor compared to the full extent I've heard of but try realising your entire closet doesn't fit!!!!)

I explained that Mirtazapine was the reason I switched to my current meds (Sertraline btw), and she says "I heard most anti depressants will make you gain weight" & I'm like, it depends. Then she talks about how she got Sertraline off the shelf (I'm not explaining this, but it's possible - just not where I am) & how she takes it, but occasionally, cos "hmm will gain weight"

HELLO I KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE I'VE BEEN THERE & no it really doesn't, not for me at least. Then she shoves me some link to some research paper like, poof, here's the proof.

I'm so pissed cos it's like, so research paper is more valid than a lived experience? & it's like Sertraline isn't even the kind of meds you take on and off (lol it's not a benzo c'monnnn 🙄) - I'd know, cos altho I've been on Sertraline for everrrr, I tried a few things before this.

It makes me so upset to think that people can just get these things off the shelf and use them however they wish, & discredit the views of someone with lived experience to actually do this properly.

& suffice to say, the max dose I've been on Sertraline is 100mg. All that has given me is dry mouth x plenty (ugh, if anything I guess it forces me to keep hydrated? 😂), feeling horribly sick as a combination of dry mouth x reflex (I call it the "morning sickness but I'm not preggers ..." 😬🙃😑), - & yes, in the adjustment phase it made me lose a certain amount of weight, yes. 🙃

I understand that experiences vary, but my gripe is having my lived experience (vs her hypothetical experience) treated like that!! 😠😡😠😡😠😡

IS IT JUST ME.

#CheckInWithMe #MentalHealth #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #Sertraline #Zoloft #SideEffects #Antidepressants #DisorderedEating

6 people are talking about this
Community Voices

Such wise words. I adore this woman 💖

<p>Such wise words. I adore this woman 💖</p>
2 people are talking about this