traumasurviviors

I just want the abilities I had ten years ago back. It gives me so much anxiety for the future watching my health and body decline so quickly. I can only do about a few hours of good work, with lots of breaks in between and then I pay for it for a day or two. I'm 42 years old, recently unemployed, and I'm not sure where I am going to fit in the working world with all of the health issues I'm battling. I don't think disability would support the very basic lifestyle I have.....help, I need someone who relates to this.

Hi! Not trying to get someone angry, but these mask mandates around certain areas for trauma survivors like me with anxiety are getting depressing. I’m sorry to anyone who got sick or died, but do people really sanitize those cloths properly... I tend to absorb a lot of people’s hostility towards one another, and i know ppl can stay home etc, but that’s very lonely and depressing and makes life hopeless sometimes. I’m all for people choosing to do as they wish, however being violent towards people with asthma or autism etc is really sad, and those people lack empathy!! The virus is going to spread regardless if we want it to or not... I wish people would be nicer and more understanding. If you’re afraid, do you really think a cloth is going to protect someone. People at airports stand apart while waiting, yet pack planes. It’s really ridiculous. If I offended anyone, I’m sorry, but I feel I wanted to share my truth. Love and light.

Doesn’t grieving abuse parents seem counterintuitive? What most people don’t realize (and what I didn’t know myself) was that you don’t just grieve your abusive parents. You grieve what you didn’t have, what you deserved to have. You grieve what you thought you had (though trauma bonds are toxic). You grieve the loss of safety, innocence, love. You grieve the losses that are yet to come (such as a parent going to jail). So as you can see, you grieve the few goods times you did have with them. Abusers don’t abuse all the time, they have days where they say the right things, do the right things. But it’s important to remember that they are still an abuser on all the other days. Yet, it is this conflicting information that causes the most pain and confusion. And it the processing of this pain and confusion that helps us to heal as painful as it might be. The only way out is through. #PTSD #traumasurviviors #ChildAbuse #SexualAbuse #abusiveparents #healingmyinnerchild

She told me she would be my friend,
That she’d make me whole.
She whispered sweet lullaby lies to me at night to send me to sleep,
And in the day she’d ward off anyone who could hurt me; I thought she was protecting me.
Slowly, she drove away the people I loved, she told me they didn’t love us, they wanted to do harm to us.
Slowly, she wormed her way into my every waking minute, now screaming in my ears.
She kept snatching back my hands whenever I strayed, she helped me deceive, lie, manipulate. We were winning together at one point, so close to the end goal; little did I know how close that end goal was to death.
We were walking on a tightrope over a deadly ravine, we were living off of the thrill. Then they separated us, they tried to turn us against each other; they threatened her, told me she wasn’t my friend; but she was all I had left in the world.
She never left my side through it all, but she’s been watching from the sidelines. She’s been holding my hand through the hard times. She doesn’t like change.
Now she wants our relationship to be a secret, she hides from the people I love because they tried to hurt her, hurt ‘us’ she says. But now she’s hurting me. She holds my head above the toilet, she pushes my hands down my throat, she’s choking me. She shelters me from those I love; she pushes in between the cracks, filling them with hatred, guilt and shame. She lets me think I’m in control before she grabs the reins and sends us charging off into the distance, alone. I want to be free of her, send her away to a safe place where there is no pain, for she has been through enough. I cling to her as an identity, for she is me and I am her; she has helped me survive. But I don’t need her to survive anymore, I now know what safety is, what belonging can look like. I love her, and that’s why I have to let her go. #AnorexiaNervosa #BulimiaNervosa #EatingDisorders #TraumaRecovery #traumasurviviors #WhereHopeGrows #Selfcompassion #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #PersonalityDisorders #MentalHealth

Curious! If you could ask ANYTHING?
www.taratalks.net/post/all-the-questions-you-secretly-want-t...
#MentalHealth #Anxiety #Trauma #WritingThroughIt #Blog #writer #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #traumasurviviors #PTSD #SexualTrauma  If they could honestly express their feelings to you (no judgement?)