Last year I was living with an amazing woman who unbeliever was my soul mate. We have been together since mid 2019. I’m 45, it’s the first time I’ve lived with a partner before. She is a life coach, and convinced me to taper off my medication which I take for depression. I was feeling great so thought why not. After Covid hit, I noticed I wasn’t feeling myself. 7 months after I was fully off the meds I was experiencing feelings of depression, stress and anxiety. I quickly spiralled. I was having panic attacks, and feeling burnout when I tried to think. I wasn’t sleeping well, some nights got no sleep. There were relationship stresses too that I was unable to process since I was feeling so unwell.
I decided to lighten the load by stepping away from a leadership position I was enjoying, my pet dog was giving us greif as he bit a few ppl and was becoming hard to manage, so I had to put him down. I was devestated. I was overwhelmed by deep depression, tiredness and anxiety attacks were crippling me. My partner couldn’t understand why I was not being intimate despite knowing the above. Foggy brain meant it was hard to do basic things, she was supportive but continually coaching me made me feel like a client. 3 months on New Year’s Day, she broke up with me, I was feeling like a zombie. Battling dark thoughts, starting to get back on the meds again after a scarey journal entry (which she read) we had to tell my family I was not well.
I moved out and into my sisters house mid Jan. A month later she asked me to move all my stuff out. Then announces she is dating again and has met someone (who I know)
I know it’s hard when your partner gets depression. 5 months later I’m still struggling each day. I can’t work and feel like such disaster. My brain feels like it’s fried. I’ve had to cut all communication after seeing a social media post with the new guy...Just broke my heart. I still love and miss her. Dealing with all these things at once is so hard:(
Living with a life coach can be really hard, I was always feeling like I’m not good enough after countless deep conversations we had. You hear a lot about other peoples stuff which isn’t healthy either. Very confronting and confusing especially when you’re unwell. I was there for her when she needed me but I feel hurt she moved me out and she moved on so quick.
Anyone out there got any advice or experienced something like this? Am I out of line for feeling this way?