A rarely discussed symptom of sexual abuse yet one of the most common. Sex addiction. I’ve experienced it and I know many girls in worse situations who also came out that way. I think it’s rarely discussed because how do you explain to people an obsession you have related to a trauma? Psychologically it’s perfectly understandable but many people don’t get that because it seems illogical.
You know the stereotype of the stripper with daddy issues? Go to any strip club and you’ll find it’s a stereotype for a reason-it’s a very common out come. Girls get molested, developed a push pull attraction to sex, their identity becomes their sex appeal (for many reasons), they need money…. So that’s where they find themselves working. They also often dabble in prostitution… I’ve considered it… I still do… every day. To get enough money to run away. Or at least to hitch a ride.
I always found it funny when people accused asexuals of being sexually abused for having no interest in sex. I’m over here like, “I’ve yet to meet a child sexual abuse survivor 100% afraid of sex. Adult sexual abuse survivors? Hell yes. Childhood? No. I think it’s more common to be addicted or have no feelings in particular (it’s for someone else never you-I know a learning disabled victim with that response… but she’s really religious so we don’t click)… to nonintimate sex… while simultaneously yes being afraid of it.
Make no sense? Welcome to my life. I can only have sex if I don’t feel it’s sweet or kind or love related. Sweet kind sex makes me freak out. I think it’s about an inability to merge romance with sex. My brain can’t fathom a coexistence between them. Sex for my abuser was about his pleasure so my brain sees sex as dirty. And can’t fathom someone loving me while doing it.
“I’m far more afraid of someone I trust touching me than a stranger,” is a good way to sum it up. These are based on my experiences and may not reflect everyone obviously but I figure I’d spell it out.