Surviving an eating disorder
Did you know that anorexia is one of the deadliest mental illnesses? Eating disorders are serious mental illnesses yet we barely ever hear about them. I don't think there is enough awareness or education surrounding eating disorders which is why I am so thankful for today's podcast guest. Suz Carpenter struggled with Bulimia most of her life. She was so ashamed that she kept it a secret even from her husband. It wasn't until someone asked her a profound question that she knew she needed to get help and change her life.
Listen to today's episode to learn more about eating disorders and Suz's powerful story of courage and hope.
I really wanna binge and purge.
I feel so addicted. Like it’s a drug. I know it’s bad for me, but I want to make myself b/p. #BulimiaNervosa
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I know my wife has relapsed into bulimia, she doesn’t know I...
Hi there 👋.
So I don’t have any professional supports, or even a diagnosed
#EatingDisorder (it’s a long story, including dismissal from professionals, invalidation of my concerns and friends accusing me of ‘wanting to have an ED’ 🙄 so ridiculous I can’t even explain how wrong this is) I’ve long believed I have an #EatingDisorder but because I can’t get help from professionals I’m trying to do this alone.
I don’t fit any of the ‘stereotypical EDs’ such as #AnorexiaNervosa #BulimiaNervosa #BingeEatingDisorder and I don’t count calories (which was the main basis that I was told by my doctors that I ‘don’t have an ED’) and would be closer to either #ednos or #arfid if I was to have a diagnosis. I don’t want another diagnosis, I have PLENTY. It’s not about that. But, at least if I did have a diagnosis, it would be easier to get help. Like I’d be able to say to someone ‘please help me with x’ and even here, I’d be able to use the hashtags most relevant! And this all makes it worse, because then I think ‘well if they say I don’t have a problem, then I mustn’t have a problem so it’s okay to continue what I’m doing’, which is damaging in itself.
So! I have a meal for lunch I have planned I need to eat. I’m doing this by myself, so it’s hard. I know I need to eat this food, I know it’s fuel for my body, I know I deserve to eat and I know that I am worth health and happiness. I know I am worth eating (that sounds weirdly phrased).
The meal only needs to be heated. And it’s been over two hours since I had planned to eat my lunch, and it’s still in the fridge. I don’t know how to get through the barrier of going through the process of having my meal. I don’t know how to get myself to open the fridge, pull out the meal, heat it, and then eat it. And because I’m trying to help myself, I don’t know what strategies would be best to use to help me through.
Does anyone have suggestions?
Thank you ❤️ (and thank you for reading this whole thing!)
Really needing help from people with undiagnosed #EatingDisorders
Need some help. Trying to help myself because no one will. I have tried to get some help, I am certain I have an #EatingDisorder but when I tried to discuss it with my psychologist, it was dismissed based on the fact I ‘don’t count calories’ (which I don’t) and that was it. But that’s not ‘just it’. I don’t fit any of the ‘typical’ forms of #EatingDisorders either, I don’t have #AnorexiaNervosa nor #BulimiaNervosa or #BingeEatingDisorder . I DO NOT need another diagnosis, I have plenty. I just need help. I need help with strategies and tools to help me live a better, happier life. I’m doing well in a lot of ways with my other mental health issues, but this is just getting out of control and I’m getting scared what will happen. Especially with the holiday season.
I’ve tried to open up to a few friends about it, people I thought would understand, and who would understand the hesitantcy I have about talking to people about it, and they accused me of ‘wanting to have an #EatingDisorder ‘ which is absolute rubbish. Who would want one? I have dear friends that struggle terribly and I hate to see their suffering and I have no idea why anyone would think anyone would ‘want’ that. So of course I stopped talking to people about it.
I am currently struggling to finish my dinner. The part that ‘hates the food’ (aka the ED part) wont let me finish it, but the other part says I should. It’s not ‘healthy food’ so there is that explanation for not finishing (because it’s ‘unhealthy food’ so I shouldn’t eat it) but then the other part says ‘fed is best’ as in ‘I struggle to eat anything, so even if it’s ‘unhealthy food’ it’s better than eating nothing at all’.
Here's hoping 🤞