Anxiety Attack

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Migraines, Life-Long (Suicidal) Depression, A Real Desire to be with my Lord and Saviour, More Debt than I can afford

Living with Life-Long Suicidal Depression since at least 4-years-old (mid 1970s); and Migraine Headaches that have been regular (at least 1 to 2 times a week [more weeks now are turning in to at least 2 days] since the mid 1990s) and many other health problems that are on and off weekly or monthly; Extra Debt that I was pressed in to; which can cause me to lose the house, SSDI so it is hard to earn extra money to get out of Debt; and with Life-Long Suicidal Depression, in addition to the Major Pains, I really have been desiring more to be able to go Home to be with my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

I would greatly appreciate any feed back.

#MentalHealth #Migraines #Depresion #SuicidalIdeation #Debt #PostTraumaticStressDisorder #BPD #Bipolar1 #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #BipolarDepression #BipolarIDisorder #BipolarDisorder #BipolarI #BipolarType1 #CheerMeOn #Bipolar1Disorder #BipolarDisorders #MigraineHeadaches #AutismSpectrumDisorder #AutismSpectrum #Autistic #SeparationAnxietyDisorder #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #IllnessAnxietyDisorder #SeparationAnxiety #AnxietyAttack #AdrenalInsufficiency #AnkylosingSpondylitis #ChronicFatigueSyndrome #DistractMe #Selfharm #PanicDisorder #PanicAttack #PanicAttacks #worry #highfunctioningautism #AttentionDeficitHyperactivityDisorder #DiabetesType2 #DiabetesII #SuicidalThoughts #SuicideAttemptSurvivors #IfYouFeelHopeless #suicidal

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Welcome to #november 2023

Hey Friends. How are you today?

I am at work at the moment and I'm about to head home soon. However, I wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you. I #Care about you, too. I know that this group is not as large as many others, but I just want you to know that this is a place where you can #Talk and say #Whatever your heart needs to say. Just remember to be loving and kind when you say it.

Sometimes we #struggle to deal with things like #Anxiety disorders, or #panic disorders. For me, I have both. These types of things hit me at night when I least expect it. I want things to get better for my job life, and I feel like it will help me with my #Anxiety and make it so that I feel more #proud of myself or that I can #accomplish something. #MentalHealth is so important to keep on the front of my mind when it comes to working. One of the major things I hope to do in the near future is have my own business, but I need the help, the love, and support of those around me in order for me to do what it is that I need to do and function.

Lets #Pray that tonight I do not have to deal with an #AnxietyAttack and that I can #Sleep peacefully. Please share your thoughts with me!

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The Dueling Mind

I hope you can relate to my PenUp Artwork from my Google tablet. It was a template that I colored to express how I am feeling constantly. It is a struggle to remain stable instead of getting stuck within the "ALL OR NOTHING" mentality. I wonder what on earth 🌎 I can do about it. Medicine 💊 helps, but it is not a cure, but just a treatment. I know many of you can relate to this picture. Surely I cannot be the only one dealing with this. I applied for disability as I keep running into the same issues that I have with every job. I lose myself in the world of depression (reduced energy, emotional mixed struggle) when there is not much to cause it situationally.

#helpme #MentalHealth #bipolarmind #BipolarDisorder #Trying #powerstruggle #Depression #PanicAttack #AnxietyAttack #PanicDisorder #AnxietyDisorder

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I’m done

I’m done with all this 🤬
The whole year since now it’s been the s*** year that I had in the last 7y since I’m in Uk.
All started since I’ve been bullied, I fixed it, I had problems at home, abroad, i fix them (more or less), I find a solution for my health (for my leg ulcer, thank for I don’t have diabetes and still waiting for a referral to hospital) but again I’ve been bullied.
After their marvellous investigation in which they said is no evidence for being offended, threatened and mocked and after offering a mediation as solution (even tho I said clear that the mediation in not the solution for a lad that have 0 respect for me), the lad haven’t went to mediation.
Now because I ve appealed the decision of the grievance, the lad is back at work.
My mental health went out on the drain.
At 4 this morning, after being told my manager that I need to behave to be respectful with that lad and some other things, like being my fault and my blame bcus he don’t behave, I had a very bad reaction: start crying.
I left the office and went somewhere where no one can see how sissy I am, I had a very bad anxiety attack, one of my colleague which is as well junior team leader come and we’ve talked, I felt like I’m suffocating.
Is not my fault that the lad is behaving badly, I always respected my colleagues even if they don’t deserve it.
Now im home, a bit calmer than work time but is i don’t know how to fix it.
For sure I understand that now they’re investigating again or it should be and if they don’t take any kind of disciplinary actions, he’ll do it again and again till I’ll go.

My mental health went away since last night when I’ve seen it and in the morning after all that start crying and couldn’t stopped, I really don’t know what I’ll do.
I had a break up from my partner yesterday as well because of this job, we’ve been together for 13y.
Im a mess and I know it but I’ll not quit my job for a jerk
#Depression
#Anxiety
#AnxietyAttack

26 reactions 9 comments
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Hospital

Is it possible to request an overnight stay at a hospital for a mental breakdown? I don’t want to be sent home after a few hours and I don’t want to go to a mental hospital though. I wasn’t sure if it was possible to request something like that. #MentalHealth #OtherMentalHealth #BipolarDisorder #Depression #SuicidalIdeation #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #AnxietyAttack

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#AnxietyAttack and #PanicAttacks

So, today my son and his girlfriend went to Chicago for the day to walk around the shops. I knew about this for 3 days but as soon as I got up I said goodbye and went on my walk. I couldn’t stop crying cause I was thinking every scenario of what was going to happen. My son said he was going to keep me posted. Once I got to the mall o was still crying but talking to my mom helped. I was about to leave then my son texted saying we made it to Chicago. All of a sudden my heart literally dropped. I immediately sat down at Barnes and Noble and started deep breathing. I did not want to draw attention to myself. I’m very proud of myself that I managed this attack on my own. He did text me and FaceTime me when I got home. Now he is on the train heading back home as I’m typing this.

6 reactions 4 comments
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Oh boy

Due to a medication accident, I had a seizure today. This was a crazy and scary experience. Thoughts and prayers for everybody #pills #AnxietyAttack

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I am terrified

I am terrified about what’s going to happen next.

Long story short 2 nights ago I had an hr meeting about my 2 colleagues that had a conflict at the beginning of the month, gave another statement as a witness and I was guaranteed that my name will never surface but I’m simply terrified about what’s going to happen next.
If my name will never surface from that statement it’s going to be good for me but if t my name reaches the surface I’ll go again through a trauma which I don’t think I can relive.
Being a witness in the conflict between the 2 colleagues (Y and X) in which Y bullied me constantly for 9 months, my head can’t go further that the next statement: he’s gonna find out that I give another statement and he’s gonna make my life a living hell.
I am stressed and anxious again, it’s over my understanding l, the worst thing is I can’t ask for help due to the fact that I am alone and I can’t trust anyone, I’m shy af as well 😔
From doing the right thing and as well telling my managers that I will not give another stat because it affects my mental health too bad to talk with hr about it and repeating again in more details it managed to terrify me, to have nigh terror again, to be afraid, to have anxiety attacks.
Beside all the crap is happening rn in my life with my mom, being so judgemental I can’t deal again with work problems.
I am again in a bad situation and I don’t see any escapes 😔
#AnxietyAttack
#Depression
#Fear

25 reactions 11 comments
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Loneliness Panic Attacks#AnxietyAttack

I haven't been on here for so long, it was my solace then I got so bad I forgot it was here. I'm so so lonely, I've tried so many ways to meet people but no one likes me. I've even started taking meds to change my personality but all I have is side effects. The loneliness causes panic attacks if I go out and my Dr stopped my anxiety meds because they're addictive but they were the only thing stopping me completely losing it. I just start crying in the street because I feel so overwhelmed and I don't even think how strange it must seem to others anymore. My family say I seem angry but how else would you feel when everyone dislikes you and you don't know why. I used to tell myself I was fine being alone but I actually think it's caused physical damage to me, the constant upset. We're not meant to be alone. Tomorrow I have to go to a non medical appointment and I can't sleep worrying im going to break down and cry. Drs used to have empathy and give me anxiety meds but the NHS keeps changing its rules with no regard to what it does to people. Their slow turn into privatisation has made me want to kill myself (I'm not going to now, don't report me). No one cares anymore in the NHS, we're just shoved from Dr to Dr with no consistency now, not allowed the same Dr even if you have chronic illnesses. I don't recognise this country anymore, something that made me feel safe is now killing me.#AnxietyAttack

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