Folks I feel very #Blessed to have made it through another week. A few times I've needed to #Shutdown & #focus on #self #Care but that's #okay . The #Important thing for me is to stay in #Touch with my #body #mind & #soul 💗 & to #nourish my #trinity #PTSD #Autism #MentalHealth
18 reactions •
5 comments
I had an accident on my carpet today. One second I felt fine and then I coughed. I tried to run to the bathroom but I almost didn't make it off my bed. This is the 3rd accident I've had this year. I gotta talk to my doctor about incontinence supplies. I almost cried after it happened. I went and got my caregiver and she was on top of it immediately. She got me a towel and turned on the fan to dry the carpet. I've been very dehydrated since last night. I drank 3 bottles of crystal light. I haven't had coffee since Saturday. I just don't have any spoons to do anything.
I have a #Daydream where I find the right #Job and lose my #unemployment and work 40 hours a week. It sounds like a #nightmare because a 40 hour work week is #scary for me. It takes away so much time from #Selfcare and #Recovery that it brings me to a point of #tears .
I began to do the whole #comparing myself to others and #Wondering why I could not be like another. I truly feel #helpless whenever I become #jobless
It is difficult for me to find a #Job that can work with a #Disability and not feel #stigmitized by my #employer secretly. I feel like I am this cat in the photo, in my own #World where everything around me is just blowing up. It is not that I do not #Care anymore, but it is that there is only so much I can do. I might as well take normal pictures along the way and try to be as #normal in my #Abnormal world possible.
Perhaps a "vocational" center will be #helpfull in finding a #Career rather than just a job... But I do not know how much #Stigma exists. I suppose I am just #afraid and at the same time #Brave for keeping applying and trying.
Wish me #luck !
9 reactions •
1 comment
I recently read a message from a woman admitting her struggle with insecurities. How she degrades herself, judges herself and dislikes herself; seeking advice.
I, unfortunately, don't have any advice on this topic - since I also struggle with my insecurities. I am so overly criticising. One thing I try to remember (not always easy) is something someone once asked me:
"What do you think of that woman standing there?" I looked over to a young woman in her 30s and said she had such a beautiful smile, the perfect portion of curves, sparkling eyes, a beautiful face... She looks happy.
The person asked- "Did you even think of looking at what isn't perfect?" I shook my head. To me, she was beautiful.
The person turned to me and said, "Do you realise that most people truly don't see the negative parts/aspects of others - they don't even notice it. They see what strikes them - what shines from you." I looked at the person, taken aback. "Also, do you realise that your body type or size is exactly as hers. I can tell you wear the same size clothes, I noticed she also has a child - you are so similar."
I returned my gaze to the woman and truly looked at her. We could have been sisters. And I didn't even notice anything that I would describe as ugly, fat or disgusting.
We all have things we want to change - things that most people don't even notice at first glance...
Perhaps, as you wish you looked like someone else, someone is staring at you, loving your eye colour, hair or smile.
I have been told that I am very hard on myself and I know most people would never expect of me what I expect or criticise myself on.
2 reactions 
Hey Friends. How are you today?
I am at work at the moment and I'm about to head home soon. However, I wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you. I #Care about you, too. I know that this group is not as large as many others, but I just want you to know that this is a place where you can #Talk and say #Whatever your heart needs to say. Just remember to be loving and kind when you say it.
Sometimes we #struggle to deal with things like #Anxiety disorders, or #panic disorders. For me, I have both. These types of things hit me at night when I least expect it. I want things to get better for my job life, and I feel like it will help me with my #Anxiety and make it so that I feel more #proud of myself or that I can #accomplish something. #MentalHealth is so important to keep on the front of my mind when it comes to working. One of the major things I hope to do in the near future is have my own business, but I need the help, the love, and support of those around me in order for me to do what it is that I need to do and function.
Lets #Pray that tonight I do not have to deal with an #AnxietyAttack and that I can #Sleep peacefully. Please share your thoughts with me!
8 reactions •
2 comments
The ugliest name and image I can think of is my extended family, as they have let my mother die to abuse, my father be locked in for 2 weeks at a time due to abuse, my life almost be taken due to abuse, my daughter's personality to change due to abuse, and my man to get away with abuse for 15 to 17 years, and especially 8 years since I've seen them, except for 5 minutes at mom's funeral and previously to this post I had no hard feelings, #Abuse , #emotional Abuse Survivors #Suicide #abandonment #Care giving #Parenting #marital abuse #Incarceration #elder abuse #Suicide due to abuse
1 reaction My mother is the only person who cares about me and I treat her very badly. My mum is always pushing me to do better. Make friends and socialise, get a new job and make more money, get a new car, clean the house up and get a girl friend.
I don't know if my mum realises how miserable and sad I am. I blame my mother for all my problems and she blames herself. She is literally the only person who calls me to see how I am and I push her away swearing at her and threatening her. I think she called me "by accident" after our conversation crying and said it was a mistake. I should feel terrible about the way I speak to my mother but somehow it relieves me of a lot of my troubles.
I am putting all my issues on my mother and causing her significant stress. I don't know how she feels because its all about me. Everything is about me and my troubles. I feel bad about how I speak to her but I think it is more about pushing her away and completely isolating myself. Once I am completely isolated is when I really consider whether my life is worth living. Fortunately or unfortunately, (depends on which way you want to look at it) she will never let that happen.
She will call again tomorrow, sometimes I wish she would let me be but I would be no better off. I love my mother more than anything and she knows that. I got clean and straightened my life out for my family with my mums support. No matter how much trouble I caused her she was always there for me. I feel bad treating her so poorly but she brings the worst out in me.
I hope my mum doesn't feel like she has failed as a mother. I think she feels bad because I am not happy, hurting and suffering.
I think she just wants me to be happy. She is not stupid and can see that I am miserable and hates seeing me this way.
#mum #motherslove #NeverGiveUp #Support #alwaysthere #reallove #Family #Truelove #Care #caring #Love #chillout #calmdown #emotional #respectful #Myfault #ownership #notherfault #mystory #Decisions #onlylove #imwrong #help #sheltered #supportive #EverythingWillBeOkay #Hope
1 reaction 
Last week we did a needs check in and the winner of the poll was a hug. So this week I decided to send everyone a virtual hug from me to you if you would like one. I know it isn't quite the same as an actual hug, but wrap your arms around yourself and hold it for at least 20 seconds while thinking about something that makes you happy. Hopefully that'll be just the dose of oxytocin you need to start your weekend off right.
Latest
