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Anxious for news of a possible surgery

About 5.75 years ago, I was intubated after being placed in a medical coma as a result of a suicide attempt. When they thought I was well enough, doctors removed the tube, but I crashed again. This happened three times which caused severe trauma to my trachea. When I awoke, my breathing was fine. It wasn’t until two months later that I began to struggle to breathe because of scar tissue that had developed. This wasn’t discovered for another two months when it was determined that I needed surgery as soon as possible. The surgeons went in, lasered off the scar tissue from my trachea, and expanded a balloon to help open the airway. At this point, my breathing has again become labored and uneven. I have an appointment tomorrow to explore via laryngoscopy to see if another surgery is necessary.

Needless to say, I’m a bit anxious.

The worst part of all of this is that I’ve made a complete 180 since that time in my life. My job still sucks, but I have an amazing husband and a beautiful home. I’m happier than I’ve ever been, yet here I am with a reminder of my misery and darkest struggles. I’m afraid that this surgery will be on repeat every 6 years for the rest of my life, and a constant reminder of the hell that was my life.

#trachea #trachealstenosis #SuicideAttempt #intubation #lifesupport #Surgery #Bipolar #Depression

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