copingstrategies

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Double OCD relationships

I love having someone who understands my brain, but it's so hard sometimes too. I am on hour 5 of resisting compulsively texting her, after receiving a barrage of compulsive texts from her and two compulsive calls. She knew what was happening and was trying really hard to resist, and I think she was eventually successful. But I am still having wave after wave of what-ifs about her safety. Logically I know she's probably asleep, but of course that does nothing for the doubts. For hour one I just handwrote a journal entry to her, and I thought that did it, but the compulsion keeps coming back. I wonder if I should just throw myself fully into an exposure session and try to speed up the process of no longer feeling like trash, but it's so late and I should have been asleep an hour ago (dr appointment, office hours, and lab meeting tomorrow, good lord), so maybe I should just rawdog it until I fall asleep. When the thoughts are so bad that I keep involuntarily hyperventilating for short periods, I don't know if an exposure would help or hurt.

I have however come up with a fun strategy: pretending that her compulsive texts are actually attempts to type out whale vocalizations. It removes the focus from the content of the messages and makes it easier for me to resist reassuring her and instead do/say things that are actually helpful (which is sometimes doing nothing). It's hard when it's relationship OCD-related, like today, because I automatically want to take it seriously and personally, but the silliness of imagining that all those texts are just like OOOOOoooaaauauuuuUu whale noises does kind of help.

#ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #ERP #ROCD #copingstrategies #Sleep #HarmOCD #Relationships #Autism #CheckInWithMe

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Coping Mechanisms, part 14R7@45alpha5 of an ongoing series ;D

Both before and after my various diagnoses, and, really, before I even had an inkling that my brain was wired differently from others, I had to come up with coping mechanisms. We all do, neurospicy or not. The world is not set up to ensure our safety or happiness on a regular basis, so we develop mechanisms for coping with both the good and the bad. (Let's set aside how we cope with good stuff for a moment, but I think it's a really important conversation.)

So, because I just need to share, because I'm an extrovert, and because the BPD "unclear sense of self" means that I am more me when I'm around, or communicating with, others than in a vacuum, I'm going to offer a few of the ways I deal with the difficulties of this condition.

I don't know where number 14R7@45alpha5 originally came from. My partner brought it home with her from work and it sounded silly, but I gave it a go and now it's my first thought. I call it "Tap Tap." You cross your arms in front of your body and start double-tapping each shoulder with the opposite hand. As with any kind of stimming, it may take a while to find the right rhythm, but once I do, and my brain starts concentrating on the rhythm, I break out into a huge grin, if not full-on laughter.

My understanding is that the stimulation of opposite sides by opposite sides helps the two hemispheres of the brain communicate a little better. There's also the mind-clearing effect of focus, much the same as concentrating on one's breathing during meditation.

Admittedly, it doesn't work for everyone. But it works for me, even when I am feeling my lowest. It may not make me smile at that point, but it keeps me from spiraling and ruminating into despair. A good friend pointed out to me about this practice that a lot of the time we're trained not to accept simple explanations. Things that are complex appear to be better-researched and more reliable. Tapping is easy. And it works. We don't need everything to be complicated.

So, "Tap Tap." Give it a go if you're feeling panicked, or teetering on the brink of one of those "everyone I ever loved is a bastard who never loved me" moods.

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #copingstrategies #BPD #Stimming

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Baseball is a Powerful Tool for Positivity guy, to me. (A brief story of how The NY Mets teach me coping in my recovery ).

With my diagnoses, a new job, and a few other things that get in the way of my recovery in full force. I always work as hard as I can, with my own strategies, my support team that is improving all of the time (which is extremely helpful and encouraging), which I am forever grateful for (I know that I can be difficult, but luckily for now I have been a little better).

This is because the game of baseball… just hear me out.

I grew up as a little girl, watching baseball, New York Mets. You can laugh at that if you need to, it’s part of having a team that has been fluctuating lately. It’s sports, competition, which is fun within your limits.

When my family moved to our current state, I was a little girl. But, everywhere you looked baseball was there. I even still have a little Mets bat-shaped keychain that I won in school. It kept my identity from New York close to me. As I grew up, like any game, baseball was able to give me a way to connect with people. It has allowed me to make new friends, enjoy with old friends, and have friendly rivalries with my family.

To me, baseball is beyond a sport, I know that I’m not playing the game in the field with the boys. But, when I hear the music that introduces the game starts, I automatically feel joy, no matter what I’m going through. No matter if they’re not doing well, there’s always hope that they will complete a game that makes you feel something. When they lose, I may feel bummed but I also find a sense of optimism, which is so difficult during certain mood swings, that they will do better next game.

It shows me that I can have a tough time, and while that’s frustrating, I just need to breathe, think about my next strategy to play my own game that comes next. When they win, it’s a huge feeling of elation. As I may watch with the family, there are nothing but cheers as loud as we can. This makes me feel so good. Watching the teams faces, as they jump around, excited about the win, makes you feel like you’re there. It’s like supporting your best friends.
…It’s like supporting myself. I can mirror the hard work ethic, with whatever outcome, breathe, ask for help, whatever it is, and my Mets show me that I can level myself out during the process of recovery, no matter the initial outcome, because there’s another inning waiting for me and that’s okay.

I am SO grateful for the New York Mets.

This may have sounded silly to you. Of course I have other things to help me. But for 162 times a year, I can cope in a very easy, safe, effective format for me.

I hope that you have your own baseball. 💚 #Bipolar1Disorder #Bipolar1DisorderPsychoticFeatures
#ADHD
#Anxiety
#RoadToRevovery
#MentalHealthAwareness
#copingstrategies
#Positivity
#HitYourOwnHomeRun
#PitchYourBestPitch

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I know, I know… but here it is. Consider it.

We are two friends both with chronic and mental illness, who decided we wanted to bring to the forefront, and open up real conversations about, how we are coping with our diagnosises. We use humor, personal experiences and scientific studies with what can potentially help; has helped; and what we are willing to try to stay sane in the midst of what we’ve been saddled with by life.
We’re also doing this to try to end stigma, raise awareness as well as discourage toxic positivity and ableism to take more root in society.

We would love your support and also your input on what coping skills you all use- join the conversation! Follow us on instagram @ creative.copes and on your favorite listening platform and comment away! The more we talk, the more mainstream it will become.
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#keeptalking #jointheconversation #jointhefight #RealTalk #EndTheStigma #Raiseawareness #MentalHealth #physicalhealth #Ableism #Toxicpositivity #copingstrategies #CopingTips #beyourownadvocate #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #ChronicMigraines #ChronicVestibularMigraine #Fibromyalgia #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #SocialAnxiety #Agoraphobia #Dysautonomia #CrohnsDisease #Endometriosis #RaynaudsPhenomenon #MyalgicEncephalomyelitis #ChronicFatigue #OccipitalNeuralgia #wecandothis #LetsDoThis

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Creative expression for mental health

I have anxiety and depression. I have found that creativity offers some degree of help. Whether it is photography, drawing, sewing, colouring, or writing, they have all offered some way to move on. It works as a distraction, as well as a mindful flow - almost a meditation. Finding the right type of creative expression at the right time though, that is helpful. This isn’t always going to work, some days are harder than others. For the days that it does work, I am all for it. Anybody else use creative expression as an outlet for their mental health challenges?
#creativity #Mindfulness #Anxiety #Depression #MentalHealth #copingstrategies #creativeflow

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I don't want tobe a trailblazer anymore.

Someone on here said to me the other day, something to the effect of "I hope you find a path,and if you can't, then you make one." I've been thinking about that over and over, along with some things a friend has said about how I've always been ahead of the curve, both in dealing with my autism issues, and my trauma and depression issues.

I just wrote this for some people in my life. Thought I'd post it here too.

One thing I'm realizing more and more, as I think about things, and as I try to discuss them with people, with varying degrees of success, is: I don't want to be the one forging the new trail anymore. I don't want to be the trailblazer anymore. After so many decades of being at the forefront of, so many things, and being the one teaching those around me what I need, and what others like me need, or for that matter, even that we exist, I'm tired of it all! I don't want to be the one fighting the overgrowth/jungle/forest/whatever head on any more. I want to be able to step back a bit and let someone else cut the path. I want someone else to be holding the lamp, saying "go this way." Someone who is also able to understand, and respect that I've been fighting this battle for decades, and that I've learned a number of things along the way. I'm no newbie to handling all the stuff I've been handling. I'm a veteran of this war, and yet, I still need ... stuff. There is still new things to learn, new "methods and technology" if you will.

It was one thing when I was part of a community of trailblazers, who could support, encourage, and educate each other, but when there's just you, it's a whole different story. Especially when you've got decades of experience and energy drain behind you! Battle scars and triumphs.

It's not that I mind the fight, or expect the way to be all paved, or expedient, or anything, but damn! To still having to be the trailblazer after all these years? It's exasperating and exhausting just thinking about it! #Autism #Disability #PTSD #CPTSD #copingstrategies #Support

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A conversation with myself

My coping mechanism is primarily to travel. I usually travel every 2-3 months to reset, reflect and write. But the pandemic prohibited me to do so. This conversation sums up all my bottled up thoughts since my last travel on December 2019. #Depression #BipolarDisorder #keepgoing #UsapTayo #Travel #CopingTips #copingstrategies #CopingMechanism #CopingWithAnxiety #Anxiety

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A balancing act

I have a long history of anxiety and depression and this year was also diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I don’t know how to balance the way I cope mentally and the way I cope physically - exercise and activity and structure helps my anxiety but some days I’m way too exhausted or foggy brained to do the things I normally would. I end up trying to rest but sometimes the anxiety gets too much. It feels an impossible balancing act - trying to care for both mind and body. #Fibromyaliga #Anxiety #copingstrategies

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Reading to cope #copingstrategies

I try to read in order to help with my anxiety about things but have to stop every five seconds for one thing or another. Anyone else have this pestering problem?!

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