nightterrors

Hi, my name is WhatisHome44. I'm here because I feel like my life is over due to my chronic illness, my childhood/current trauma, and my deteriorating body. Because of this, everything I’ve spent my life working toward has fallen apart. And I have no way to make it any better. I’m 34. I’m losing weight astronomically fast. I have an illness that is exacerbated by stress, and there are people in my life who go out of their way to cause me stress. I don’t have a family physician. I’ve been bounced around from nurse practitioner to nurse practitioner, and am in a horrible situation at a private clinic. I’m losing all of my savings and these private clinics are cleaning me out. I didn’t have much to begin with. I cannot afford food. My wife works every single day and I work 5 days out of the week from home. I’m a musician/composer/audio engineer, but I’ve been struggling to hold my instruments. I’m losing mobility in my arms and legs. My brain is not functioning correctly, and I haven’t slept longer than 4-5 hours in over a year. I’m so tired. It’s so hard to work and even harder to function. I have no pain control. And I’m eligible for M.A.I.D in my country. I am trying to hold on. But am ready to exit. This was quite long but barely scratched the surface. I apologize for the heavy subject matter.

#MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Migraine #Fibromyalgia #PTSD #EatingDisorder #OCD #Grief #RheumatoidArthritis #SystemicLupus #reactivearthritis #NeurologicalDisorder #musician #Burden #PanicDisorder #AnorexiaNervosa #nightterrors #SleepTerrors #ChronicFatigue #ChronicPain #chronicinsomnia #Insomnia

I just woke up from the worst #sleepterror of my life. I am staying at a friends and I must have scared the beans out of her when sge rushed in to find me standing and screaming bloody murder. I screamed so hard and so long that my throat and chest are still burning an hour later. I’ve had night terrors before but never this bad. I recently tapered completely off of Zoloft so I’m wondering if this is another side effect of #ssriwithdrawal
Anyone else experience this? #CheckInWithMe #nightterrors #PTSD #Zoloft

It's 11:34 at night as I'm typing this. I've woken up screaming approximately 5-6 tomes in the last hour due to c-ptsd nightmares. Now I'm just sitting here writing away in my journal and now my phone and trying my hardest not to go into full on panic mode cause I have work at 7am tomorrow. I can't call in "sick" or ask off. They need me that day at that time. I work in childcare so it's a very high stress work environment. I need sleep. My body is exhausted but my brain just won't give me a break 😔 #CPTSD #Nightmares #nightterrors #Insomnia

I have not been sleeping well at all. Thank you insomnia and trauma for that... I get absolutely horrible night terrors. I'm talking waking up in a sweat shaking and screaming. Sleep is scary for me at the moment but I'm trying to change that now. Tonight I'm trying brown noise instead of my music I use to sleep. I read that background noise like that is really good for trauma and anxiety at night. Then I'm also replacing the bright lights on while I sleep to some simple fairy lights above my bed. Nice alternative to the overhead lights when I try to sleep. I'm also implementing a new night routine. Which I will hopefully be able to stick too. Hygiene, comfy clothes, an enjoyable activity that's relaxing, take my night meds, some simple meditation before bed, then it's off to bed. Let's see how this goes. I will be posting an update a few days into it for those who also struggle with trauma and insomnia. Wish me luck! #Trauma #CPTSD #nightterrors #Insomnia #Anxiety #SleepTerrors

I feel the darkness moving in, Stalking me again. It’s coming, coming ... I know from the queasy in the pit of my stomach, my heart beat drumming in my ears, my hairs prickle and stands on end, electrified. He's here. Icy sweat leaks from all my pores. Escape is futile. It senses me as I sense it. It stays just to the fringe of my vision. When I turn to look it’s gone, but not gone. I can feel its cold presence nearby in the heavy darkness that comes to eclipse all my light.

Does anyone else have extreme night terrors. So bad that you have physical affects the next day. As in swelling of a body part, burning, or complete and utterly body exhaustion. I’ve always delt with #nightterrors but this morning was the most intense one in years. I’m afraid my sleep is going to go down the drain now... #ChronicIlless #Sleep #nightmare #MentalHealth

Why? Why does this keep happening? I feel like I'm doing so well and then BAM ! A night terror related to a man that has not been a part of my life for a decade and that I thought I had even forgiven for the things he did to hurt me and forgiven myself for feeling as though I allowed it to happen. Waking up in an #AnxietyAttack is soo hard. Convincing myself that it's a dream, that he can't hurt me and that I'm ok is draining and mind melting. Thanks for letting me vent. Hugs to you all

How many of you act out your nightmares? I’ve been known to scream, kick and punch during night terrors when our bodies should be paralyzed. I recently found out it is REM Sleep Behavior Disorder. I’ve done this since I was a child. I live alone, so I don’t have to worry about hurting a bed partner, but a couple weeks ago I did manage to kick my dog so hard she flew 2 feet off the bed. I felt horrible.

My med doctor just put me on Prazosin to help with this. She said it was from the CPTSD, and the drug would help. The only side effect I notice is that I am tired all day. Anyone else have this? Take medication? What’s your experience? #RBD #CPTSD #nightterrors

Not very much in this world scares me. Maybe because ive been thru, seen, and felt all the scary things i can think of? Most recently, my past is presenting in my dreams... More than ever. I've processed these events and negative emotions over the last 20 years in therapy. However, this week has been rough to say the least. My body hurts from the physical tension and fighting while im at rest. My nerves are shot from trying to process these dreams- reliving the hell i once walked thru. My inner strength is being broken by second guessing my past and my actions. I am tired😣. #CPTSD #Anxiety #nightterrors #ChronicDepression #ChronicPain