afraid

I have a #Daydream where I find the right #Job and lose my #unemployment and work 40 hours a week. It sounds like a #nightmare because a 40 hour work week is #scary for me. It takes away so much time from #Selfcare and #Recovery that it brings me to a point of #tears .

I began to do the whole #comparing myself to others and #Wondering why I could not be like another. I truly feel #helpless whenever I become #jobless

It is difficult for me to find a #Job that can work with a #Disability and not feel #stigmitized by my #employer secretly. I feel like I am this cat in the photo, in my own #World where everything around me is just blowing up. It is not that I do not #Care anymore, but it is that there is only so much I can do. I might as well take normal pictures along the way and try to be as #normal in my #Abnormal world possible.

Perhaps a "vocational" center will be #helpfull in finding a #Career rather than just a job... But I do not know how much #Stigma exists. I suppose I am just #afraid and at the same time #Brave for keeping applying and trying.

Wish me #luck !

I’ve been waiting to get this off my chest since this past weekend. But have been afraid too.

Once a month I go to these furry meetups with friends and I look forward to these however there is this guy there that usually cosplays which is different than fursuiting. Anyway, I don’t know him and he somehow figured out my full name and address about six months ago and has been writing to me. My parents don’t find anything weird about how he got this information. In fact they think it’s cute. He was filling me around the meet which was annoying and gave me a valentine this past weekend and it’s obvious that he likes me. With the items that were gifted to me.

As I write this out it almost doesn’t sound real. But it is and it’s super frustrating. I’m bummed out because I’ve always wanted a penpal but not like this.

The leader of the furry meetups found out about this guy’s stalker behavior and has officially banned him from coming back to events and if he still attends police will be called. I’ve been contacted by so many of the other furries within this group about what I know and what’s been going on I feel terrible. Like by finally speaking up and out I’m wrong. I’m so lost and confused and feel cause in the middle of this. Because it’s obvious he bothers more than just me.

Anyway thank for listening. Here’s a picture of my cat #CheckInWithMe #ChronicDepression #Depression #Anxiety #AnxietyAttack #afraid

When chronic pain has a person, such as myself, nearly completely homebound & bedridden, living alone can surely be a big issue. #Cats are purrrfect companions, not having to be walked & go in the litter pan. I am holding onto #Hope , using every bit of might I have in me. Hurts trying so hard, for so long, continuously in the face of frustration & disapointment. I #Need to hold on, for I am to the point of extreme & exaggerated #desperation . & this being my first Christmas without her, it's reached its peak today. I'm a little #afraid to #Lose all Hope at this point. Well. Wishing a Happy Merry Christmas for us all. At least May it be the the #best we can make it. #atleast . 🙏
#MightyTogether

#Fear #conqueringfear #faceyourfears #afraid #growth

Some people act like/tell me they love me.. but they really don’t. I feel they only love the idea of me or what I can offer them.. otherwise they’d act like they love me even when they don’t want something… am I crazy for thinking that? Why do I get that vibe?

Every time someone says they love me, I just say… give it time.

#Anxiety #Goodenough #Depression #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #ChronicMigraines #unwell #Music #Therapy #Love #afraid #Worried #HypothyroidismUnderactiveThyroidDisease #Endometriosis #PolycysticOvarySyndrome #Fibromyalgia #ilovethissong #newnormal #painandprayers

Are you afraid that everything that has happened so far in your life isn’t what you will continue to be like/do? Are you afraid of falling in love? Are you afraid of living more than one person? Are you afraid of living? Are you afraid to speak your mind? Are you afraid of anything?

#afraid #Anxiety #Fear #Goodenough #Music #ChronicIllness #ChronicMigraines #Endometriosis #PolycysticOvarySyndrome #HypothyroidismUnderactiveThyroidDisease #Fibromyalgia #Medicine #Hormones #warrior #newnormal