jobless

I have a #Daydream where I find the right #Job and lose my #unemployment and work 40 hours a week. It sounds like a #nightmare because a 40 hour work week is #scary for me. It takes away so much time from #Selfcare and #Recovery that it brings me to a point of #tears .

I began to do the whole #comparing myself to others and #Wondering why I could not be like another. I truly feel #helpless whenever I become #jobless

It is difficult for me to find a #Job that can work with a #Disability and not feel #stigmitized by my #employer secretly. I feel like I am this cat in the photo, in my own #World where everything around me is just blowing up. It is not that I do not #Care anymore, but it is that there is only so much I can do. I might as well take normal pictures along the way and try to be as #normal in my #Abnormal world possible.

Perhaps a "vocational" center will be #helpfull in finding a #Career rather than just a job... But I do not know how much #Stigma exists. I suppose I am just #afraid and at the same time #Brave for keeping applying and trying.

Wish me #luck !

Hello Everyone. The past two jobs I recently had are #gone now. I feel like I cannot keep a #Job more than 6 months to a year these days. I am #embarassed beyond belief. A lot of times these events that lead up to my #termination of employment are because of the stupid events that happen. These past two jobs and why I left were actually not my #fault this time. Well, maybe. One of them said I was unable to #learn the material in such a short amount of time. The other is that I was acting #emotional in the workplace. This time.. I wasn't!

Now... I am #struggling I could really use some #encouragement

Please #help me.

How do I put into words what it is that I am feeling right now? I am confused and wishing I could be just neutral.

I went shopping a little while ago, and on my way home my husband called me. He told me I should not have went shopping and spent money. I bought him some things for father's day and when I mentioned I got him some things, he became upset. It is because I don't have a job. He was upset with me about us having one income and going shopping.

He told me to not put up roadblocks into me finding a job, or doing what it is that I want to do. Professionalism is not something that comes easy for me, and with my mental health issues it's harder than that of a person without them. It is not an excuse to stay where I am, but it does not make it as easy as someone else's level of difficulty. I know everyone experiences difficulties. I swear it will be OK. I just have to find something that I love to do and go for it.

Today is a day of mixed emotions. It's driving me nuts... But it's something that I have to deal with. I am hoping for a better tomorrow since today is a Mix of a Mess and a Blessing.

Take Care.

#Love #Trying #iamhere #sad #happy #MixedMood #Depression #Anxiety #BipolarDisorder #jobless #lonely #notalone #up &Down #PanicAttack #PanicDisorder #Crazy #Wild #calm #confused #shoppingaddiction #Mourning #grieving #Grief #FathersDay #dowhatyoulove #lovewhatyoudo #Loveislove #PrideMonth #Trying #doing

How do I put into words what my thoughts bring to me? There were times were my therapist in the past would tell me that all feelings come from thoughts.

But what if what you're feeling can inspire what you are thinking instead? Humm.

Today I thought about my memorial day weekend. Yesterday was good because I went food shopping. It was amazing because I did not "freak out" at the store. Usually I order my groceries and pick them up, but otherwise when I go with someone to grocery shop I do not feel bad. What did you guys do over the weekend???

#Thoughts #trouble #Thinking #MentalHealth #Laughs #Goodtimes #badtimes #MemorialDay #Anxiety #BipolarDisorder #AnxietyDisorder #PanicDisorder #jobless #emotional