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Healer Pains

Healer Pains

Full of Anger and rage
Feeling like I’m a animal locked in a cage
My nature is so misunderstood
Perhaps it’s time to move on from the hood
But I Love my independent city
Even though the committee ain’t take no pity

Isolated and assets frozen
Although they don’t yet know I’m part of God’s chosen
Treated like a hardcore criminal
My poem are definitely subliminal
If you know me, you’ll get it
Ain’t the usual one to quit

I walked away for self protection
So, wouldn’t be forced into flexion
Straight forward as it can be
Though I did flee, At least I’m free
Self love is a priority
Even if I ain’t in the majority

That don’t stop us from doing as we please
Perhaps, why I’m a narcissist that is to be put in a freeze
From trauma and vulnerabilities we came up,
Banged up, beat up - yet we still worked hard and built up
So, why the hate?
And all the jealousy mate?
Took you for free spins and fed you during your worst

You were injured and I was the one to bring you back to health and nursed
And now I’m cursed?
Don’t bite the hand that feeds you
One day, you gotta regret it my boo
True love, acceptance and understanding- heck, gave even my soul
Now, all this hurt masking as anger and making feel like a burning coal

Quite the toll, though I thought your love was free
Then, why the hefty fee?
Anger and rage on the front
Amidst a manhunt
Hurt and grief under the front
Perhaps, nows the time to get blunt

Yes, I am fucked up
And the only one who saved me is my pup
You were right, I was stupid
The only mistake I made was chasing Cupid
Don’t know my story yet think they know all
Destroying me so I forget to walk and can barely even crawl

Malicious prosecution and defamation
Think it’s a game of persuasion
It’s nothing more than a crime
To prevent me from the social and corporate climb
You think I forgot, that’s cute
I never forget a learned friend dispute

You know I’m better than you
And that’s a strong fact that’s more than just true
Don’t let simple nature and humble attitude fool you into arrogance
You caused me to lose my soul and become spiritless
The student is now the master
Now that deserves a round of applause and laughter

Karma is a mogul’s game
And though I don’t care for the fame, it ain’t gonna stop me from bringing the claim
Justice is overdue, stayed quiet for too long
Have come closer to being proven wrong
My only regret, had I spoken earlier
I would be worthier

Money is important but my people are my assets
They are the ones to get my out of bad debts
Got my back because we init for ride or die
They ain’t no supply, they real niggas on which we can rely
Now that’s a fact you cannot deny
My team here for the full and permanent long haul

And although right now, I’m back at the stage of crawl
I got the mindset and approach to stay resilient
Cuz I found out way too late that I’m more than just brilliant
Genius and gifted talent, that’s God’s chosen
So, let me give you a glimpse of my life in slow-motion
Watch out cuz this girl’s a tornado, not to be tamed

She won’t remain for much longer chained
It’s time to break free
And I think that’s something y’all agree #heartbreak #Love #Pain #growth #soulpain #selfhelp #SelfHealing #writings #Journaling #feelings #Emotions #validation #hurt #Grief #Loss #Rejection #abandonment #social isolation #punishment #Karma #sins #good #bad

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Any tips for when you feel like a loser? :(

Sorry if it sounds negative but any tips for when you’re feeling really low about yourself/ your life? Thanks 🙏

Appreciate any little pick me ups or those who can relate to this sometimes :c #lonely #sad #down #Low #hardonmyself #loser #lowselfesteem #Trying # headspace #Depression #Anxiety #Pickmeup #Tips #Selflove #Quotes #bad day #beatingmyselfupemotionally #selfsabotage #wantselflove #wanttoworkonselfcompassion

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Shopping Addiction. When #Shopping is beyond #retailtherapy and Breaks the Bank 👀

This cat in the image gives me the face I make when my husband sees me reaching for something to put in the cart and tells me to put it back. I feel like I am so wrong or about to do something that will #hurt me. When things are #Wrong or #IAmStruggling it doesn't feel like I have #power . I feel #powerless .

#shoppingaddiction is real. My mother has it worse than me right now, whereas I have people telling me "No!" And "Put it Back!" Holding me accountable. It still feels hurtful.

I no longer go to stores just to "Look." I cannot go to a store just to "Look around." Especially an issue if I see something and cannot buy it. We are all experiencing some kind of #financial issues. #Medicine is so dang expensive, and that often causes us to fall into a pit. I do not know what to do, but I have been trying things other than talk #Therapy .

I decided to click online "Add to Cart" or "Add to Wishlist." This is common for websites like Amazon or Bath & Body Works. Especially now that the Christmas season is here.. I see things I want to #Buy for other people, or things I want for the #home or for #Myself . It feels #bad .

Have you experienced #shoppingaddiction ?

If so, what do you do?
🛒🛍️💳💰💵💸

I need #Advice .

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Nervous

Hey everyone.
I don't feel quite well. I feel like something bad is happening.
What do you do when it is happening to you?

#bad feelings

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Feeling of hurting myself

I don’t know if anyone has experienced this. When I’m driving sometimes I feel like vearing off the road and hitting a tree and getting into an accident. #Anxiety #Depresion #Thinking #bad thoughts

5 comments
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Pain - pain - pain!

Today I’m really surrering. My legs are both swollen. They burn (I think it’s an infection). But both hips and knees are giving me problems. I think I’m gonna ask my Doctor to X-Ray all of them to see which is worse and I’ll get surgery on it. I have an artificial right hip and left knee.I’ve had my right hip replaced; for a second time a few years ago but I don’t think it’s doing good and it can’t be replaced or even corrected a third time. My left knee is long past dule for a second replacement. My right knee feels like it’s bone on bone as does my left hip. So I see my Dr next week and I’ll get him to do those and I’ll bring them all to my surgeon and see what he thinks. I just want the pain gone! NOW!!!!
Sorry about complaining, I try not to but this is ridiculous.

#Christians on the Mighty #type II diabetes #always in bed #chronic pain #fibro #scoliosis #ibs #ocd # Mighty pets #52 small things #mighty minute #mighty bits #gratitude #grace #jesus #bible Study #christian #me/CFS #tmj #myalgic Encephalomyelato ##myofacial pain syndrome #secondary sjögres syndrome #gerd #bad hips #bad knees

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#bad days should be musical

When I have a very bad day, I sing. I’ll try to make a parody song about anger and frustration and tears. A lot of times it helps.

6 comments
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Fibromyalgia pain

This morning the Fibro pain has again reared its ugly head- I hate when it starts my day,instead of ending my day( tho that's not nice to be hurting at bedtime,either!). Guess it's the below freezing temperature that's got it going. Don't you( those with fibro) just hate it when the fibro takes over even Before the day starts? It over comes the arthritis,the swollen feet & lower legs,the fitful sleep from the nite,and tired mind from having to deal with it & everything else on a daily basis. Even the pretty sunrise this morning gets hit. Big Sigh. Oh well,such is life when you are used to hurting All Over from an Invisible Disease. #Fibromyalgia ,#RA ,#oa ,#PTSD ,#GAD ,#Bipolar 2,#GERD ,#Insomnia ,#high Blood Pressure,#Allergies to most Everything,#sinusitis chronic,#Teeth problems( likely from meds been on for so long,acc.to dentist),#"covering" how I really am feeling,#bad dreams that carry over into the day,#restlessness ,#So many Meds,#dry Eye Syndrome,#Dermatitis -chronic,#Headaches ,Short term memory loss left over from ECT treatments,#Fibro Brain Fog,#sad ,#Overeating when illnesses take over too much,##Poor Self-Image,#Stagnant motivation,#chronic Talking to Myself-even Out Loud,#Talking & writing too much,#worry ,#Thinking of others instead of me,#people Pleaser,#Procrastination ,#Poor money management,#Ignoring important signs & Symptoms.

12 comments
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Truly terrible skin HELP 😔

#Fibromyalgia . for the last few years the condition of my skin has become dreadful. I have dry scaly patches that become sore. Spots under my skin. Scars from old spots. Brown Mark's and it feels so thin and easily damaged. I've never had problems with my skin before.
This is really getting me stressed. I'm even on daily antibiotics from the doctor, but no improvement.
Does any have any tread and tested solutions? #bad skin

9 comments